


The Unsung Losers

by Ctrvpani



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: F/M, It’s a fix it in regards to the losers club, M/M, Story focuses on Original characters, With appearances from the losers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-04-11 02:47:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 68,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21517039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ctrvpani/pseuds/Ctrvpani
Summary: The Losers Club were not the only ones to suffer the terrifying clutches of Pennywise the Clown. Story follows four others during the summer of 1989 who all suffered terrifying experiences. 27 years later they feel this weird strong urge to go and visit Derry, little do they know they will be fighting to conquer their fears.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Original Character/Original Character, Stanley Uris/Original Male Character
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter One - Bella

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Bella’s Summer and the first of the four to leave Derry.

Here she was quietly walking home with Eddie Kaspbrak as he walked alongside her holding onto his bike, the silence between them was incredibly awkward. They were neighbours and her mom always insisted that she should hang out with Eddie more. If she was honest she thinks her mom was trying to get her a little boyfriend and Eddie seemed the right pick especially because of what happened all those years ago.

She still remembers it very clearly and how terrified she felt. She was at the backstage of the school stage, getting ready to go on, it was the school play and her mom had come to see her, her dad was stuck in work but he had wished her the best of luck promising that she is going to be amazing. She wasn’t the lead part of the play, no that was given to Beverly Marsh but she had gotten a pretty good part and it seemed like Greta Bowie was not happy about it. She noticed the death stares Greta gave her while she patiently waited to go on, it made her feel anxious but she earned this part, she had every right to be excited and confident.

When she had gone on stage she was all confident and smiles especially when she saw her mom in the front row next to Eddie’s mom. This was her moment to shine and she did. As her part was done and she left the stage she was all smiles and a sense of pride in herself, that’s when the uncomfortable feeling of Greta’s death stare stabbed away at all of her confidence. Her smile dropped and she went somewhere else away from her while she waited for the play to finish.

She sat down on a chair while she watched some of the boys get ready to go on stage. Seemed Richie Tozier was playing with Eddie’s props while an angry Eddie was trying to get them off him, it was pretty funny to watch. Her legs swung on the chair as she watched the teacher go over and take it off Richie and give it back, watching as Eddie stuck his tongue out at him causing her to giggle. “Bella sweetie? Could you put these away in the closest for me?” Her teacher had asked her as she now held various props in her hands. She was always happy to help her teacher, Bella smiled, jumping off her chair as she took the props from her teacher’s hands and made her way to the small walk in closest. 

The props needed to go right to the back of the closest, walking right into it as she put the props away in the boxes a sudden darkness took over and the sound of the click of the lock. Panic began to wash over her as she made her way to the door. “Hello?” She called out as she tried to open the door, it was locked.

She could hear the sound of giggles before a rush of footsteps began to grow quiet. She’s locked in, she’s locked in! Bella began to bang on the door, stopping to look through the key hole, no one was around, they’re all hanging out by the stage.  
“I’m locked in! Someone help!” She called out, banging on the door.

She began to panic it felt like the walls of the closest were beginning to close in on her and she couldn’t breathe. Her throat grew weak whether it was because she could feel herself beginning to cry or because she felt like she couldn’t breathe she didn’t know. What if they never find her? What if she’s locked here forever? Bella yelled out, frantically banging on the door and sobbing in a panicked state.

She begged outloud hoping that someone would walk past and let her out. She continued to bang on the door until she heard another voice “hello?” He called out, by the sounds of the voice it was Eddie Kaspbrak.  
“Hello?! I can’t get out!” She sobbed as she heard the sound of footsteps making their way closer to the door and the sound of the lock being pulled.

Poor little Eddie got the fight of his life the moment he opened the closest as Bella Morgan threw herself into his arms and began to sob, clutching hard onto him. His hand awkwardly reaching up to pat her back in an attempt to comfort her. Everyone started to come over as they heard the commotion going on.  
“Bella sweetie what’s happened?” Asked her class teacher as she rushed over to them both.  
“She was locked in Miss” Responded Eddie.

The play continued on and Bella spent the rest of it sitting on a chair next to Eddie who had offered to stay with her. It was silent between the two apart from the sound of her sniffles and hiccups as she began to calm down. 

When both Bella and Eddie’s moms found out what had happened, since then they were set up on awkward “play dates” which usually consisted of them awkwardly sitting in silence, her wearing some stupid dress her mom brought her and awkward smiles at each other. 

“You should play with Eddie more, he’s such a sweet boy” her mom would say to her, sure he’s really sweet and has a cute smile but her mom was really not helping. Now it’s become a thing where Eddie’s mom would tell him that Bella is walking home with him after school since they’re neighbours. The walks home were usually a little awkward, saying a few little things here and there before it becomes a silence again. Bella can’t lie, she does have a little crush on Eddie.

But Bella had also noticed how Richie always had this almost annoyed look on his face whenever she came over to Eddie, she couldn’t understand why because she had never really even spoken to him. When she’s partnered up with Richie in class he was always fine with her but it’s a different story whenever she’s near Eddie. Did he know that she liked him? Did he think she was going to get in the middle of their friendship?

They gave each other quiet goodbyes before splitting off to go into their homes. She entered the house saying a quick I’m home to her mom before going up the stairs to her bedroom. It was the day before the last day of school and she’d be finished for the summer, in a way she was relieved, this year had been too stressful for a thirteen year old. 

She hung her bag up on her door before she fell back onto her bed. Closing her eyes for a little bit before the sound of the static on her walkie talkie started to go off. “Bells! Come in Bells! You there?” It was her other neighbour Marcus, also only friend in school.

She opened her eyes again, reaching forward for the walkie talkie “Bells here you there mucus?” She asked.  
“Why is my code name Mucus again?”  
“The only thing I could think of similar to Marcus”  
“I could have just been codenamed Mark” he exclaimed  
“Mark is boring” she smirked.  
“Anyway! You up for going to the movie theatre tonight?” Asked Marcus.  
“We have school tomorrow”  
“So?! It will be the last day before summer! We should go! Unless you’re scared that is?” Teased Marcus, she could hear his smirk.

She thought about it, one late school night wouldn’t be too bad, she doubts many people will be in school tomorrow due to it being the last day before summer anyway.  
“Of course I’m not scared! Okay I’ll be there” she sighed.  
“Awesome! Hit my window when you’re ready Bells!” He said before he was gone.

Bella sighed, putting the walkie talkie to the side before getting up to find something new to wear. She went with a simple pink dress with a denim jacket to go over. She quickly grabbed her bag before rushing down stairs calling out that she’s going to the movies with Marcus before she left the house.

Making her way over to Marcus’ house she picked up a rock she found on the ground before throwing it at his window a loud clang as it did. She watched as Marcus opened his window, a smile on his face as he looked down at her “I’m impressed! I’ll just be a second” he said as he complimented her rock throwing skills before he disappeared and the window was shut again.

She walked over to sit on his front porch as she sat and waited for her friend to come down. Elbows on her knees as she rested her head in her hands as she waited, He seems to take an awfully long time to get ready for a boy.

She finally heard the sound of the front door being opened as Marcus finally arrived. “You took your time” she said as she turned to look at him “curl your hair?” She asked as she stood up with a smirk on his face.  
“Oh shut up Bells” he scoffed as he playfully shoved her. 

For a walk that is usually long to the Derry movie theatre it felt awfully quick, probably because with Marcus she can laugh and joke with him and time flies by. It’s usually awkward and quiet with Eddie and she’s always fixated on his sweet brown eyes that make her heart do little flips, after what happened with the whole closest thing she’s always felt like Eddie was her little knight in shining armour. Marcus is just her friend, her mom has questioned before if something was going on because it was rare for girls to just hang out with boys in Derry but he was just a friend, the one to always make her laugh and smile when she was down. 

They arrived at the movie theatre and payed for their tickets, tonight some sort of warewolf movie was showing and it seems a lot of kids from school had come here tonight. Bella brought the candy and Marcus brought the root beers and popcorn, that’s always how it went down.

He came rushing over to her with smiles and his hands incredibly full as Bella took her stuff, offering a sweet thanks as they made their way in to find a seat. It was busy in the movie theatre tonight as the seats began to fill up both finding seats at the back before Marcus put his feet up. 

Bella slapped his arm as she told him it’s rude to put his feet up “okay mom” he muttered as he rubbed his arm. Bella watched as all the people arrived all in groups as they found places to sit, She noticed Eddie walk in with his other friends, Richie, Stan and Bill. He gave her a small smile and a wave and Bella gave a little wave back. “You’re so obvious” Muttered Marcus through the popcorn currently in his mouth.  
“What?”  
“You obviously have a thing for Eddie” he responded causing Bella to flop back in her chair and roll her eyes. 

As she continued to watch people come in that’s when she noticed one boy, anxiously pulling on his jacket sleeves as he looked around for a place to sit. He looked pretty familiar, he looked her age so maybe he was in her classes.

“Poor kid” said Marcus  
“Who is he?” She asked as she turned to face her friend  
“That’s Ethan Davis...he doesn’t have any friends but I think it’s because he’s quiet, he’s in my math class...just keeps to himself but it seems he’s been a target by the Bowers gang” he explained.  
“Who hasn’t?” She responded, she’s pretty sure Patrick the fucking creep had wolf whistled at her once.

She felt bad for this Ethan kid as she watched him looking to try to find a seat but others clearly didn’t want to know.  
“You think we should invite him to sit with us?” She asked as Marcus shrugged his shoulders in response  
“Sure”  
“Ethan!” She called out causing the boy to jump a little and look up at her, furrowing his eyebrows and pointing at himself.

“Yeah!” She said as she waved her hand as an indication for him to come over. He nervously pulled on his sleeves as he made his way up the steps towards her and Marcus.  
As Ethan came closer she was able to get a better look at him he was about her height maybe slightly taller, brown hair that looked a little fluffed and soft brown eyes just like Eddie. 

He had a nervous smile as he stood in front of her “You alone?” She asked.  
Ethan swallowed before pulling on his sleeves “um...yeah but it’s fine!” He nervously said before Bella quickly responded back.  
“Do you want to sit with us?” She asked causing Ethan’s eyes to almost light up, Bella thought it was cute.  
“Y-you sure? I mean I-“ he started stuttering a little before Bella smiled back at him.  
“Yeah I’m sure” she said with a soft smile.  
“Take a seat bud” joined in Marcus before Ethan smiled back, slowly sitting down in the chair next to her.

It went silent in the room as the lights when out, reaching out she held Marcus’ hand tightly as his breath hitched, Marcus is scared of the dark and Bella was aware, she always held his hand to reassure him that she was there but the fear usually goes away once the screen turns on, giving light to the room.

The movie went on for a while, all looking incredibly ridiculous and fake and Bella grew bored. That’s when she noticed something, something red in the corner of her eye. As she looked there it was a red balloon, floating in the room, was no one else noticing this? She felt this urge to go after it, like the balloon was drawing her towards it.

She excused herself, telling the boys that she needed the bathroom as she shuffled past Ethan before she went to follow the balloon. She walked down the steps, quickly moving out the way of people in front before leaving the room. There was the balloon again slowly going down a corridor in the movie theatre. She felt like she hand no control of her feet as she followed the balloon down the corridor getting closer and closer to another door.

Slowly opening the door leading to another corridor she continued walking and walking, following the balloon until she got to the back of the room. As she grabbed the balloon she felt the presence of someone there, as she slowly looked forward she noticed something hidden in the darkness. Her eyes narrowed as she tried to get a better look, that’s when she noticed the figure of someone, face slowly emerging out of the darkness....a clown.

“Bella isn’t it?” The clown said with a toothy smile. Bella nodded her head but something felt wrong, really wrong.  
“You lost Bella?” It said next but something about the question sent shivers down her spine.  
She nervously swallowed before speaking up “I should go” she muttered as she stepped back, letting go of the balloon.

“What’s the rush Bells?” The clown said, the nickname rolling off it’s tongue causing Bella’s heart to begin to pound. This was wrong, she was abandoned in the theatre, away from everyone else, children had been reported missing all year, none of them found, she needed to run.

She turned around and began to run but it felt like the corridor was getting longer and longer. She picked up the pace and suddenly it felt like the corridor was getting smaller and smaller. She felt like she couldn’t breathe, she was getting flashbacks to all those years with the closet, the fear she felt that day. The walls felt like they were getting smaller and smaller as she continued to run. It felt like a nightmare only this time it was real. She could hear the clown laughing in her ears and she began to scream as she continued to run, screaming until her throat hurt. She needed out, the walls were closing in on her.

She tripped over her feet, falling to the floor before she slowly curled up in a ball. The walls still feeling like they’re closing in on her as she began to sob and scream, the laughter of the clown still in her ears. This was it, whatever it was she was going to die, she was either going to suffocate or get crushed to death. 

She screamed and sobbed and the next minute there was a brightness and the force of someone grabbing her arm and forcefully pulling her out. The clown? She began to scream about to kick the clown away “Bella! Bella it’s okay!” A boy’s voice said, suddenly she felt two hands at her cheeks, forcing her to look up at the source of the voice and that’s when she was met with a pair brown eyes. It was Ethan, he had a look of worry and concern on his face as he held hers. 

“Hey you’re okay, I promise you you’re okay” he said softly as Bella’s breathing began to calm down and the sobs began, she was shaking but Ethan pulled her closer into a hug. Her hand clutched his jacket as she buried her face into his shirt, she could sense Marcus was standing there too unsure of what to do because his best friend was crying and clearly terrified. Most likely people will be coming out to see what the commotion was but she didn’t care, she nearly died back there and Ethan came to her rescue. 

...................

She didn’t talk about that happened when she came into school the next day and Marcus didn’t ask, he probably thought it was best not to and she didn’t blame him. She didn’t see Ethan the next day but she wanted to thank him for looking out for her, she had never even noticed or spoken to him before but there he was as her knight in shining armour saving her. 

They walked outside during lunch and went to sit under a tree. It had been a little quiet between the two after what had happened the day before, she wasn’t sure if they had taken someone’s seat because there was a small red book on the floor. She turned to look at Marcus who raised an eyebrow at her.  
“We can’t look it’s rude!” She said  
“They won’t know!” He responded as he reached forward to snatch the book from her hands.

She shook her head as she turned away, she’s not going to invade someone’s privacy like that, Marcus may be able to live with that guilt but she couldn’t.  
“Man some asshole really did a number on this guys drawings, scribbled black shit all over them....Bells?” his tone of voice suddenly changing.  
“You need to look at this” he said as Bella curiously turned her head, god she feels so bad for looking at someone else’s stuff. Her heartbeat picked up once she sees what’s on the page, it was a drawing....of her? 

Under the scribbles she could see the different shades of brown in her hair, her smile and the freckles across her nose, the drawing looked incredibly realistic and soft looking. It was making her heart race, someone had took the time to draw her and she didn’t even know who, it can’t be Eddie as much as she’d want it to be, she’s never seen that boy draw, Bill Denbrough draws that she knows but she’s sure she’s seen him with a black book instead of a red one.

“Is that me?” She said  
“Either that or a strong look alike, Bella Morgan has a secret admirer” he smirked as he put the book down and Bella felt a smile forming on her own face.  
She felt guilty for being just as bad as Marcus and sneaking at this persons notepad but someone had took the time to draw her, some asshole had scribbled all over it but it didn’t change that fact that someone drew her, she couldn’t help but smile. It was all she could think about for the rest of the school day.

...........

“Can we talk about what happened yesterday? At the movie theatre” spoke up Marcus as they sat on his front porch. Bella sighed, feeling her heart rate beginning to pick up at the mention of what happened at that movie theatre. Her hands began to shake a little so she clenched them tightly.

“I saw a balloon in the movie theatre...I followed it and it led me to the corridor that you and Ethan found me in...there was a clown...everything felt wrong and scary and I just ran, the corridor grew longer and longer and the walls began to close it on me, and I thought I was going to die” she explained before growing silent maybe Marcus was quiet because he was shocked. Next minute she heard him laughing, she felt this anger begin to boil inside her at the sound of his laughter.

His smile dropped when he noticed how angry she looked “you’re serious?” He said with amusement in his voice.  
“Of course I’m serious!”  
“Oh come on Bells do you expect me to believe that?!”  
“Yes because you’re my friend! You saw how scared I was!”  
“You sure it’s not because you were scared of the movie?” He said with a smirk.  
Bella bit her tongue before she shook her head as she got up “I know it sounds crazy but I hoped you of all people would believe me” she said as she stood up to face him.  
“I’m sorry Bells but-“  
“Don’t call me that!....don’t talk to me and don’t be asking me to hang out” she said quietly as she turned towards her house. Marcus called after her as she entered the house but she ignored him, what an asshole, she thought him of all people would believe her. 

She felt humiliated all over again like back in the closest all those years ago and last night, she went to her room, throwing herself onto her bed before she hugged her pillow and began to cry.

....................  
That summer went by slow without speaking to Marcus, she didn’t want to know and she didn’t care....that was a lie of course she cared, he was her best friend and that clown had broke them apart, she knows what she saw, what she experienced. 

Her mom had sent her to go and get some milk from the grocery store since she had spent all summer in her home. I mean once or twice her mom had sent her round to Eddie’s home which she always looked forward too even if it was a little awkward at times, she’d always put on her best dress and be full of smiles. The talking was starting to become a little less awkward but it was still awkward. 

As she was leaving the store she noticed someone leaning against the wall at the back of the store, panting for breath...Ethan?  
“Ethan?” She called out as she made her way over, that’s when she noticed his bloody knee “oh my god what happened?” She said with worry.  
“It’s um nothing?”  
“Doesn’t look like nothing! What happened? Was it Bowers?” She asked as Ethan shook his head.  
“It’s okay, I just fell” he said in response as Bella put the milk down and reached for her backpack.

She pulled out a pack of tissues as she kneeled down in front of him. Ethan jumped back a little as the tissue touched the cut “sorry, it might sting a little” she said as she began to wipe some of the blood away. She could feel Ethan looking down at her but she continued cleaning the cut on his knee, once it seemed like the cut was clean enough she pulled out a bandaid from her bag before putting it over his cut.

“There! all done!” She exclaimed as she looked up at him with a smile before standing up. Ethan smiled back at her “t-thanks” he said, words stuttering a little.  
“It’s okay....I um I’ve been looking for you actually...I just wanted to say thank you...for the whole movie theatre thing” she said, already feeling the embarrassment after what happened with Marcus.

“It’s no problem...are you okay now?” He asked her.  
“Uh yeah...just got a bit of a scare that’s all, just glad you where there to protect me” she said with a smile before she picked up her milk as she went to turn around and leave.

“I’d do it again!” He called out as she paused in her steps.  
“Sorry?” She asked as she turned back around, watching as he nervously played with his sleeves.  
“I said I’d d-do it again...if you needed protecting” he said with a nervous smile.  
“See ya around Ethan” she said with a soft smile before she walked away.  
She heard a faint “You too Bella” something about it make a smile appear on her face. 

........

She was surprised when she woke up to the sound of the static of her walkie talkie. “B-Bella are you there?” She sat up as she turned to look at her clock it was 3am. She didn’t respond, maybe if she ignored him he’d get the message.

“I’m sorry Bella...I-I should have listened to you, y-you where right! You where so fucking right!” Sobbed Marcus, Marcus was crying? And what did he mean she was right.  
“I heard a voice and S-something grabbed me in the dark under my bed, my lamp is broken and I-I I’m scared Bella!” He sobbed, Bella rushed out of her bed to grab for the walkie talkie.

“Hey Marcus it’s okay, hey it’s okay! I’ll be there!” She said before throwing her walkie talkie somewhere and reaching for her dressing gown. She opened her bedside draw and began to rummage through her stuff until she finally found what she was looking for, a small little nightlight in the shape of a moon. Putting it into her pocket she quickly left her bedroom, down the stairs trying not to wake her mom and dad before slowly but quietly leaving the house.

She quickly rushed to the front of Marcus’ house as she figured out how to get up. She’s watched Richie Tozier climb up to Eddie’s window some nights so it can’t be too hard right? Grabbing onto a part of it she began to climb up, she didn’t realise how scary and how high up it actually was but she forced herself not to look down as she continued to climb up as she got closer and closer to Marcus’ window. 

She felt relief as she reached the window, a shakey arm reaching forward to knock on the window before she saw Marcus make his way over to open the window. His usually dark slick back hair as now a mess and he had tears coming down his face “h-how?” He muttered as he stared at Bella clutching a part of the roof.

He reached forward and helped to pull her in through his window before shutting it behind him. “Tell me what happened” she said first as Marcus began to pace the room.

“The bulb has gone in my lamp and I heard this voice...like-like a clown laughing and then it-it grabbed me from under my bed and started to pull at me...B-Bells I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for not believing you I-“ Marcus was tripping over his words, as he started to sob, hands covering his eyes as his body shook a little.

Bella rushed over to him as she pulled him into a hug, his arms quickly reaching out to wrap around her as he kept sobbing his apologies to her. “It’s okay, it doesn’t matter, you’re okay that’s the only thing that matters right now” she reassured him.

They stayed like that for a while as Marcus began to slowly calm down before pulling away from Bella and wiping his eyes. “I brought something” she said with a soft smile as she searched for the plug sockets in his room, as she found one right by his bed she pulled the little nightlight out of her pocket and plugged it in. 

“Now you’ll always have a light even when your lamp is broken” she said as Marcus gave a sad smile. She spent the rest of the night at his, they didn’t really sleep but they stayed up most of the night and talked, they had missed speaking to each other so to finally be able to speak again felt like a wash of relief, summer had really sucked without each other.

They stayed together until the sun came up and Marcus had let Bella out through the front door so that she could go back home, their friendship after that felt like it always had been. The only difference was that they were ready to fight the clown if the fucker ever came back to hurt either of them.

.........

After Summer was over things became a little interesting. Somehow Bella was able to build up the courage after a little of encouragement from her mom she was able to ask if Eddie wanted to go to the movies with her. After that they basically became boyfriend and girlfriend, Marcus thought it was ridiculous and so did Richie too by the looks of things. They would hold hands and give kisses on the cheek and nothing else really, quite innocent and sweet in a way but Marcus did not think they were compatible, fuck what he know about relationships anyway?

Richie came across as a little cold towards her every time she came over to see Eddie, almost like he’d give these evil looks or have a strong look of what she could only describe as jealousy? She wouldn’t get in the way of their friendship if that’s what’s going through his head. 

They talked a little more but there was still this awkwardness, maybe because they’re neighbours and they’re now boyfriend and girlfriend who knows! Maybe it’s because he’s her first boyfriend and doesn’t really know how relationships work.

It didn’t last very long because half a year later her dad got a job somewhere else which meant she had to move out of Derry with her family. She had to say goodbye to Eddie which she did with a kiss on the cheek, the worst was saying goodbye to Marcus, god knows if she’d ever see her best friend again, the thought was enough to make her cry. 

As she looked in the back window of the car she noticed someone else watching...Ethan? She watched as he gave her a small smile and reached his hand up to wave a goodbye, she gave a sad smile back as she waved.

She continued to look out the back window as they drove away from Derry but even then an unsettling presence was telling her that this would not be the last time she’d see this place.


	2. Chapter Two - Ethan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter follows Ethan’s summer leading up to him leaving Derry.

Sitting at his table he had his notebook out, finishing off the final touches of his drawing. His pencil gracefully sliding on the paper as he finished the eyelashes before adding more to the faint freckles across her nose. He looked up from his book, watching as she sat at the side of the classroom, writing on her paper, the look of concentration on her face as she pressed her pencil against her lips, thinking about her answer. 

Sitting next to the window meant the sunlight shun bright through the windows and across her face, her brown eyes looking like honey in the light. The little smile on her face as she finally figured out the answer before writing again. Her smile was enough to make his heart race. He looked back at his drawing of Bella on his page and closed it, slipping the book into his bag to avoid the prying eyes of others in his class. 

Bella would never notice him, he was just someone in the shadows, someone that everyone forgets, even the teachers do...even his dad. As the bell rang he quickly grabbed his bag and books before rushing out of school to head home. He’d rather not bump into Henry Bowers and his goons, quiet people like him were always a target to them.

He walked home alone like every other day and quietly let himself into the house. When he entered the house he looked to see his dad at the table, beer in one hand while working on something, he didn’t even acknowledge that he was home. It was always the same, since the passing of his mom he became cold, distant...almost like he forgot about his own son. It breaks Ethan’s heart because all he wants to do is make his dad proud but he fears that he’s just a disappointment. 

He walked into the living room to put his bag away and take his drawing book out.  
“What you got there?” Called out his dad which actually make Ethan jump a little with surprise, his dad actually wanted to know? Never mind that his dad was actually talking to him?  
“I um...my drawing book” Responded Ethan.

“You didn’t tell me you could draw” his dad responded, amusement in his voice. Of course he doesn’t know he can draw, because he never wants to know what he’s up to. It was silent again between the two before what his dad said next surprised him.  
“Can I see?” He asked and Ethan felt his own eyes light up, his dad actually wanted to see his work? Oh wow his dad actually wanted to see his work?!

Ethan felt a smile of his face as he walked over to his dad and handed the book over for him to look. He watched as his dad let go of his beer bottle of took the book. As he opened the book Ethan was sure he saw his dad’s eyes light up at the drawings.  
“You trace these?” He asked, Ethan shook his head.  
“Oh wow” he muttered as he continued to scan the pages. 

He turned to his latest drawing and raised his eyebrow as he looked up at Ethan. “This someone you know?” He asked and Ethan could feel himself now feeling a little flustered on the face.  
“Um...it’s just a girl in my class...Bella” he said quietly.  
“Ah Bella...do you like this Bella?” He asked with a smirk but Ethan didn’t say anything, biting his lip a little in response.  
“Well maybe Bella would like this drawing” he said as he closed the book and passed it back to Ethan.

“So” started his dad as he leaned forward a little.  
“You wanna be an artist when you grow up?” He asked.  
“Maybe, I don’t know yet...I mean I really like to draw, maybe I could sell my art and get us enough money to move out of Derry and get a big house” Exclaimed Ethan as his dad raised his eyebrows with amusement.  
“Is that right?” He said with a smile.

“Yeah the house would be hu-“ as Ethan expanded his arms out he knocked the beer bottle on the table, spilling all over his dad’s paper work. Silence filled the room as they both looked at the papers.

“D-dad I’m sorry” he stuttered, he’s fucked everything up.  
His dad closed his eyes, loudly exhaling “go to your room” he said quietly but he could see that familiar cold expression on his face.  
“I’m really s-“  
“-now Ethan!” He said louder, Ethan clutched his book before quietly walking out of the living room and up the stairs to his bedroom.

As he entered his bedroom he climbed onto his bed and grabbed his pillow. He fucked up, for the first time in years his dad actually wanted to know what he was up to, he was making conversation with him and almost a sense of pride in him...now he’s ruined it, his dad will never want to bother again. He clutched onto his pillow and began to sob.

Seems he cried himself to sleep because he woke up an hour or two later, hands still clutching the pillow, his eyes feeling a little sore and his face now feeling sticky from dried tears. 

He swallowed as his throat felt dry before he sat up. There was a movie playing at the Derry movie theatre tonight, maybe he should go, give himself time away from the house for a bit. He bit his lip as he thought about it before quietly leaving his room. He slowly walked down the stairs, pausing to see his dad back at the table working, feeling the heartbreak and pain of what happened hours before still in his mind. He shook his head before slowly and quietly making his way out the door. 

When he arrived he brought one ticket for himself and a bag of candy, shoving it into his pocket before going to find a seat. It did hurt him seeing all these people here in groups, he had no one. No friends and no family by the looks of things...he had no one. He could feel eyes on him, scanning him up and down, their judgemental eyes. He started pulling on his sleeves, feeling his anxiety beginning to build, feeling like he wanted the world to swallow him whole.

The seats were continuing to fill up which made him more anxious as he looked around.  
“Ethan!” Called out a voice causing him to jump a little. As he looked around to the source of the voice his heartbeat almost felt like it was about to pound through his chest as he saw it was Bella Morgan, sitting on the back row of the movie theatre, she called his name?

Ethan looked around before he pointed at himself.  
“Yeah!” She responded as she waved her hand, indicating for him to come over. Ethan nervously swallowed as he made his way up the steps towards Bella. She almost took his breath away as he was now standing in front of her she was so beautiful up close, he felt like his heart was doing flips, the way she softly smiled at him and her eyes lit up as he came over.

“You alone?” She asked.  
Ethan swallowed before pulling on his sleeves again “um...yeah but it’s fine!” He nervously said before Bella quickly responded back.  
“Do you want to sit with us?” She asked causing Ethan’s eyes to almost light up, she’s asking him to sit with her?  
“Y-you sure? I mean I-“ he started stuttering a little before Bella smiled back at him.  
“Yeah I’m sure” she said with a soft smile.  
“Take a seat bud” joined in the boy next to her, Marcus he thinks is his name, a boy in his class who seems to be close friends with Bella. Ethan smiled back, slowly sitting down in the chair next to her. He was sitting with Bella Morgan! The girl he’s had a crush on for god knows how long and she was really sweet too, smiling back at him before she turned to look at the screen.

Slowly the lights went out as the film began, he couldn’t really focus on the movie because the only thing on his mind was the fact that he was sitting next to Bella and she wanted him to sit with her. As the movie continued on Bella whispered that she needed the bathroom before Ethan moved back a little in his seat so that she could get past him, watching as she walked down the steps and out the room.

As time went on there was no sign of Bella coming back, was she okay? Something didn’t feel right and he was starting to feel anxious “She’s still not back?” Whispered Marcus who had moved to Bella’s seat causing Ethan to jump a little.  
“No...should we go and find her?” Responded Ethan as he turned to look at Marcus is the darkness, only the light of the screen bringing some light to his face.  
Marcus was quiet for a minute before he looked at the screen, watching as the werewolf started tearing someone to shreds. Ethan looked at Marcus’ face of disgust which was enough to make him chuckle before Marcus quickly turned back to look at him “Yeah let’s go find her” 

They both got out of their seats and began to head down the stairs and out the screen room. It was empty out in the front entrance of the movie theatre but the first thing Ethan heard was screams. Both of them turned to look at a door at the end of the corridor before Ethan ran as fast as he could towards the door. 

He didn’t even think about what could be happening on the other side, he pulled open the door and yanked a curled up Bella out of the room. Bella went to scream and kick while Ethan called out “Bella! Bella it’s okay!” As he grabbed her face, one hand on each of her cheeks as he forced her to look at him. Her eyes, glistening with tears and wide with fear as she looked at him.  
“Hey you’re okay, I promise you you’re okay” he said softly as he watched her beginning to calm down, her bottom lip trembling before she started to sob. Ethan wrapped his arms around her as he pulled her close, he felt her smaller hands clutching onto his jacket as she continued to cry. Nothing else mattered around him right now as he held her close, promising that she’s okay and that he’s here to protect her. 

That evening he walked back home with her and Marcus, it was quiet as no one really knew what to say after what had happened. Both Ethan and Marcus couldn’t understand what had happened, she refused to talk about it. 

As they got to Bella’s door, Marcus turned to Ethan “I’ll take it from here...thank you for tonight” he said as Ethan gave a soft smile back “it’s okay” he responded before turning away to leave.

................  
How could he have been so stupid?! Who would leave their notebook out on the desk for any asshole to look at?

He was only gone for a minute but when he came back he noticed his book was open. As he sat down the first thing he noticed was black, black scribbles all over the pages. He began to flick through, all his drawings ruined, all this work he had spent so much time on for nothing, only for it to be destroyed. The moment he saw his drawing of Bella covered in black scribbles of ink he wanted to cry. 

Looking up he searched for any sign of who could have done it, not that he would confront them anyway because he knows he wouldn’t win. That’s when he noticed Henry Bowers looking right at him, smirk on his face as he spun his pen in his fingers, blowing on it as if his work was done. 

He wanted to cry, he felt his hands clutching the book hard before he grabbed his things and left. He could hear the teacher calling out for him but he didn’t listen, he just continued to walk. He continued walking until he found a shaded area outside near the courtyard away from everyone else before he sat down.

He looked down at his now destroyed drawings before he could feel the tears beginning to build up and his body beginning to shake a little with sobs. All his work, all his emotions, all his time and dedication all destroyed, why? Ethan has never done anything to Bowers, hell he won’t even look in his direction but still he chose to ruin something he spent so much work on, how could someone be so mean? 

He had his hands over his face as he sobbed. “Hey you okay?” Asked a voice causing Ethan to jump a little as he moved his hands away from his face, as looked up through tear filled eyes he saw a boy in front of him he was pretty sure it was Ben also known as the ‘new kid’. He watched as Ben reached into his pocket and pulled out a tissue before passing it to Ethan.

Ethan gave a soft thanks as he took the tissue and wiped his eyes “Can I sit here?” He asked and Ethan nodded his head, watching as Ben moved to sit down next to him.  
“Bowers do that?” He asked as he watched Ethan clutching the book.  
“Y-yeah”  
“Can I see?” Ben asked as Ethan hesitantly looked at his own book, he’s never heard anything bad about new kid so he doubts he’s here to make fun of him.  
Hesitantly Ethan handed Ben the notebook, watching as he gently took hold of it like the book was made of glass and looked through the pages. 

Although the drawings were now covered in pen scribbles Ben had a look of amazement in his eyes as the slowly turned the pages.  
“That’s Bella Morgan right?” He asked as he looked at his latest drawing.  
Ethan felt his cheeks heating up and a flush of embarrassment as he’s now basically exposing himself because why else would you saw a girl in your class.  
“It’s really good” he said as Ethan look back with surprise  
“You think so?”  
“Yeah! I mean it looks exactly like her, she’s in a few of my classes so....” he said before going a little quiet again. It made Ethan feel a little better, to hear someone else compliment his drawings and not judge him for drawing a girl he clearly has a crush on.

“Thanks” He said softly as Ben handed the book back to him.  
“I’m Ben-“  
“-I know, the new kid....I’m Ethan” he said before Ben gave a soft smile. 

The bell rang causing both boys to look towards the sound, that’s when Ben got up, clutching onto his bag “I have to get to class but...don’t let Bowers upset you, he’s just jealous that you’re talented” he said as Ethan gave a sad smile back.  
“If you need anyone you can always come and find me” suggested Ben.  
“Thanks” said Ethan softly  
“See you around Ethan” was the last thing Ben said before he walked off to head to class.

He must admit Ben made him feel a little better, from what he’s aware Henry Bowers and his gang are not really liked by people in the school, maybe he is jealous but he doubts it. 

He looked back at his notebook, it not longer felt of use to him anymore it had been ruined and if he continues to use it, it will just remind him of Bowers’ smug face, making him want to punch the smugness off it. He shook his head, leaving the notebook on the ground under the tree as he got up. He breathed out and wiped his eyes, he’s strong, he can go back in with a brave face, fuck Bowers!

......

Ethan got himself a new notebook over the summer, starting fresh with his work. Things were still rough with his dad, he never really spoke to him after the beer incident, things had gone back to how they use to be. A shadow and nuisance in his dad’s life. All he wants to do is make his dad proud but he’s so cold and distant with him that it feels like he’s a failure.

He was walking alone, trying to find some inspiration to draw something in his book. Maybe the creepy house in Derry that everyone always seems to avoid could be an idea, he noticed he had been heading that way without even realising until he was standing right outside it. He tapped his pencil against his lips as he thought about it.

He opened his notebook before hesitantly putting the pencil on the paper.  
“Ethan” a whisper, so faint but the sound of it made him go cold. He looked up to see the door of the house open but no one was on the other side.  
He stood there staring at the door that’s when he noticed something, a red balloon slowly floating across the front of the house.

Hearing the sound of scribbles, Ethan looked down at his notepad as words began to magically appear on the paper ‘failure’ ‘freak’ ‘ugly’ ‘loser’ ‘weirdo’ ‘coward’ all these insults began to appear on the page causing him to panic before Ethan quickly closed the book gasping for air. He closed his eyes, slowly inhaling before he slowly exhaled. He’s imagining things, he’s going crazy, he must be.

He could feel a presence near him as he kept his eyes closed. As he opened them the first thing he saw was a clown standing right in front of him, it wore a big puffy dirty white outfit and had bright orange hair and had a toothy smile on its face, something about the smile brought shivers down his spine.

“Hello Ethan” the clown said and Ethan felt his breath catch in his throat. He gasped falling back as he looked up at the clown.  
“What’s the matter Ethan? Don’t you want to draw?” The clown teased as Ethan began to shuffle back, the clown stepping forward each time, there was an evil presence about the clown and he needed to get away. 

He somehow found the courage from his state of shock to scramble onto his feet as he started to run. He started to run, screaming out for help in hopes that someone would help him “THATS IT RUN LIKE THE COWARD THAT YOU ARE!” Shouted the clown but the voice sounded like it was in his head. Ethan didn’t look back as he continued to run, screaming out for someone to find him “WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I’D CARE ETHAN?!” It was his dad’s voice now filling his head.  
“You should float with the clown Ethan, I wouldn’t miss you, you’re a failure, you’re an embarrassment” his dad’s voice had never sounded so much like venom in his head.  
“You’re no son of mine” the voices continued as Ethan ran, he was growing tried.

That’s when he tripped on his feet, landing on the floor and feeling a sudden sting on his knee. He quickly got up and continued to run, he could feel the blood trickling down his leg but he ignored it as he ran. He was pretty sure the clown was gone, the voices had stopped but he was too scared to stop.

Eventually he grew tired and ended up stopping by the local store as he caught his breath. He leaned against the wall, panting for breath out of exhaustion and fear, his heart pounding in his chest and his pulse beating loudly in his ears. 

“Ethan?” He opened his eyes at the familiar voice of Bella Morgan, he turned to look as he saw her holding a bottle of milk.  
“my god what happened?” She said with worry as she rushed over towards him.  
“It’s um nothing-“  
“-Doesn’t look like nothing! What happened? Was it Bowers?” She asked, looking down at his bleeding leg as Ethan shook his head.  
“It’s okay, I just fell” he said in response as Bella put the milk down and reached for her backpack. Ethan watched with confusion as she began to rummage through her bag.

She pulled out a pack of tissues as she kneeled down in front of him. Ethan jumped back a little as the tissue touched the cut, feeling it sting at the feeling of it being touched.  
“sorry, it might sting a little” she said as she began to wipe some of the blood away. 

He looked down at her, looking at the concentrated look on her face as she cleaned his cut. The cute look on her face was enough to distract him from the sting of the cut. She dropped the tissues on the floor before she reached back into her bag, this time pulling out a bandaid and placing it over his cut.

“There all done!” She exclaimed as she looked up at him with the most sweetest smile he had ever seen before she stood up. Ethan smiled back at her “t-thanks” he said, words stuttering a little.  
“It’s okay....I um I’ve been looking for you actually...I just wanted to say thank you...for the whole movie theatre thing” she said, she didn’t need to thank him for that, the only thing that mattered to him was that she was okay and safe. 

“It’s no problem...are you okay now?” He asked her.  
“Uh yeah...just got a bit of a scare that’s all, just glad you where there to protect me” she said with a smile before she picked up her milk as she went to turn around and leave.

He didn’t even think about his words before speaking out  
“I’d do it again!” He called out as she paused in her steps.  
“Sorry?” She asked as she turned back around, Ethan instantly felt the embarrassment and began to play with the sleeves of his jacket.  
“I said I’d d-do it again...if you needed protecting” he said with a nervous smile.  
“See ya around Ethan” she said with a soft smile before she walked away.  
“You too Bella” He said quietly, he should have felt embarrassed for saying those things but her smile made it all okay, even if a part of him tells him that he’d never have a chance with her.

That night he came back home to his dad watching the tv, he closed the door loud enough for his dad to hear but he showed no acknowledgement of his appearance. As he entered his bedroom he curled up in a ball on his bed, thinking about all those things the clown had said in his dad’s voice.

His father had never said any of those things but now he wonders if that’s what he thinks of him? Is he really a failure? 

......

Ethan sat on his porch as he looked out into space, he was bored, incredibly bored. He didn’t want to go in the house and feel the tension between him and his dad but he didn’t have anyone else to play with.

It suddenly went a little shaded as someone now stood in front of him, as he looked up he saw a boy similar to his height. He’s pretty sure that it was his neighbour, he’s never spoken to him but he’s aware that the kid is related to Vic Criss, cousins he thinks they are.

“My mom said I have to play with you” Oh, he cant say he was expecting that. He looked up at the boy surprised but the kid had no expression.  
“O-okay” Responded Ethan as the boy moved to sit next to him on the front porch.

This was a little awkward Ethan must admit. “I’m Seb”  
“E-Ethan” they both awkwardly reached out and shook hands before it was quiet again.  
“Soooo” started Seb as he slowly leaned back a little.  
“You like comics?” He asked as he looked at his own hands.  
“Y-yeah they’re cool” Muttered Ethan.  
“Cool....wanna hit the comic book store?” He asked next as he turned to look at him.  
Ethan shrugged his shoulders “sure” he responded quietly as they both got up and walked to the comic book store together.

Turns out that visit to the comic book store was what they needed to break the ice between them. They started talking and begining to learn more about each other and suddenly Ethan didn’t feel so lonely anymore. Everyday that summer Seb would either be at his door or Ethan would be knock on his door, asking Seb’s mom if he can come and hang out with him. 

They’d get ice cream, visit the arcade and just talk. They were in a field, some random ass field in Derry which was close to the kissing bridge. Both lying on the grass and looking up at the clouds in the sky.  
“Can I tell you something...but you have to promise not to laugh” started Seb as he turned his head to look at Ethan, Ethan turned his head back.  
“Okay” He said before they both turned to look at the clouds again.

“Few days before I met you I was chased by a clown....it was really scary but it was like it was something else, it transformed into a zombie...I hate zombies” he confessed and Ethan felt like he was going to be sick, he thought he was the only one who was tormented. After his experience he even questioned if it was some fucking weird hallucination that he had because no one has said about a clown tormenting children in Derry. He also thought about Bella, her screaming and crying in his arms at the movie theatre...maybe it was the clown? 

“I’m surprised you’re not laughing” said Seb as the silence broke between them. Ethan nervously swallowed, trying to bring the nausea down as he spoke “t-that’s because I believe you” he responded back causing Seb to lift himself up on his elbows as he turned to look at Ethan.

“I um...I saw the clown too, it chased after me and said some really mean things, even scribbled mean things in my notebook” he explained.  
“What did IT say?”  
“I don’t really wanna talk about it” he said quietly, the painful things the clown said in his dad’s voice.

“I’m scared Ethan...it’s like it was feeding from my fear, I don’t want IT to feed on anymore of my fears...which is why I’m about to tell you this” he explained, tell him what? Ethan sat up now and so did Seb. They now sat side by side next to each other in the field.

“Recently I’ve been confused, like I’ve been questioning things about myself that I’ve never thought about before...I um...I like girls, I’ve had a crush on girls in my classes before but” he started, Ethan could feel the nerves and fear in his voice as he tired to get to the point of what he wanted to tell him. Ethan kept silent, looking back at him with encouragement and reassurance.

“I’ve um met someone I’ve started crushing on...I....I like Stanley Uris” he confessed.  
“Okay” Responded Ethan.  
“No I really, REALLY like Stanley Uris” he said, emphasising the word really.  
“And that’s okay” Responded Ethan, a smile began to form on Seb’s face.  
“Really?”  
“Really” that’s when Seb pulled Ethan into a hug, he must have felt so scared to tell him and how he relaxed in Ethan’s arms as he felt the relief wash over Seb.  
“I really like Bella Morgan” confessed Ethan causing Seb to chuckle.  
“Thats pretty obvious” he responded with a smirk.

Ethan pulled away from the hug as he looked at him. “What?” Thats when a smile spread on Seb’s face.  
“Before we started speaking in school I could see how you looked at her, you’re not very subtle Ethan” 

....  
Ethan woke up in the afternoon from a nap as he heard something hit the window, as he looked over at the window there was Seb standing in the front yard. Ethan tried to look at his face as something didn’t look right with him. Ethan held up his finger to indicate that he would be a second before he rushed down the stairs to answer the door.

As he did there was Seb standing there, tears in his eyes and sobbing heavily. “H-Henry B-Bowers has been a-arrested....h-he killed V-Vic” he said, voice jumpy and uncontrollable with sobs. He had heard about Henry’s arrest apparently he had murdered his father and people were starting to pin the missing children on Henry but something was telling him that the missing children had something to do with that clown. What he didn’t know was that Henry had killed Vic and Belch.

Ethan pulled Seb into a hug as the boy collapsed in his arms and began to sob harder, gripping onto his shirt. Bowers has killed Seb’s cousin and now Seb was in a state of pain and grief, the only thing Ethan could do was be there for him.

Seb ended up sleeping over at Ethan’s that night, sharing the bed but they didn’t sleep that night. They lay there for hours just talking about anything and everything, Seb cried a few more times and Ethan was there to listen and comfort him.

.....

When Ethan came back to school after the summer the last thing he thought he’d be feeling was heartbreak. He had spent the rest of the summer trying to find a way to build up the courage to tell Bella that he liked her even with the encouragement of Seb. He hoped to tell her on the first day back at school.

All of that came to a halt when he saw her, she was holding hands with Eddie Kaspbrak. Holding hands! He shouldn’t over think it, maybe they’re just friends, some friends hold hands right? That was until she leaned over and kissed his cheek. He was pretty sure he just felt his heart smash into a thousand pieces. 

He swallowed as his throat felt like it was growing weak and tears threatened to spill. This hurt, like really hurt, having a crush sucks because now he’s pretty sure this is how heartbreak feels. He clutched his backpack and ran to the bathroom, he couldn’t think of anywhere else to go. As he headed to the bathroom he wasn’t sure if anyone was in the stalls but he didn’t care. He entered one of the stalls, closing it behind him as he began to silently cry. He was stupid to think that someone like Bella would be interested in him, he was stupid to think that anyone would care or even be interested in him.

“Ethan? Ethan you in here?” It was Seb.  
“I’m okay! I’m fine! I just need a minute” Called out Ethan as he quickly wiped his eyes.  
“No you’re not, I just saw Bella and Eddie” he said as Ethan listened to what sounded like him sitting on the bathroom floor next to the stall, talk about gross.  
“Look...if Bella can’t see you for the kind and caring person that you are that I have grown to know, the one that accepted me for liking both girls and boys and the one who didn’t make fun of me over the clown situation...then she’s not worth it Ethan” explained Seb as Ethan shook his head, he gets that Seb is trying to cheer him up but he was wrong...Bella would always be worth it to him.

“She’ll always be worth it...it doesn’t matter if she’s with Eddie...I’d still look out for her, I’d still protect her even if she doesn’t feel the same way as I do about her” he said as Seb sighed and it went quiet again. 

“Listen...lets just skip school today”  
Suggested Seb.  
“But we have class-“  
“-so? Do you wanna wanna go through today feeling like this? I know I wouldn’t”  
“But its a school year, it’s the first day of class”  
“Then let’s make your first day tomorrow, use today to collect yourself and come back tomorrow as the better person, the strong one” said Seb as Ethan went silent again. 

“What about you? H-how are you holding up?” Asked Ethan, it hadn’t been that long since Seb lost his cousin.  
He was pretty sure Seb shrug his shoulders as he heard them brush against the stall.  
“I’m okay....I guess, but it’s just one of those things were I need to continue on, I can’t let the world stop around me because my cousin is gone” he said muttering a little at the last part.  
“I guess we both could use one more day away from school...so what do you say? You up for skipping school today?” Seb asked.

Ethan sniffled as he wiped his eyes with his sleeve before he nodded his yeah and whispering a “Okay”.  
He got up and unlocked the door as Seb stood up to face him as he opened his arms for Ethan.

Ethan accepted the embrace, resting his head on Seb’s shoulder as he felt his arms wrap around him. The hug was only brief and quick before they pulled away and Seb placed an arm over his shoulder before they walked out of the bathroom and out of school.

......  
Ethan’s second heartbreak was when he found out Bella was leaving Derry. He shouldn’t be surprised because everyone wants out of this shitty place, he knows he does. He took the time to make his way to her home, he arrive as she climbed into the car. He watched as she sat in the back of the car and looked out the window back window towards Eddie and Marcus.

That’s when he noticed her turn to look at him through the window and he felt like his heart was doing flips. He reached his hand up and waved goodbye to her before she softly smiled and waved back as the car drove away. He sighed, maybe he was just never meant to be with her but it doesn’t mean that he’ll stop thinking about her. 

He’s already planned that he’s going to college and study to become a teacher, if his father is not going to give a shit about him then he’s going to focus on himself. He didn’t leave Derry until he received a letter stating that he got a place in the college of his choice. 

“Dad! Dad I got in!” He said gleefully but his dad brushed it off as he watched the Tv. Ethan still felt the hurt but now as he got older he felt this anger inside him. He’s kept quiet for too long about the emotional pain his father has given him all these years and now he’s done.

“You know what Steven?” the sound of his dad’s first name spitting out of Ethan’s mouth, causing him to stop looking at the tv and turn to look at him.  
“You may not give a shit about me and what I do but now I’m happy! Because I’m going somewhere, I’m getting out of this shitty town and making something of myself! I guess what I’m trying to say is that this is goodbye because you’re never going to see me again, I’m going to get a career and live my life...not that you’d care anyway” he spat as he headed up the stairs to pack his things. He’s going to move out until the college year starts, thinking about the look of shock on his dad’s face was enough to bring a smirk to Ethan’s. He was finally moving on.


	3. Chapter Three - Sebastian

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Sebastian’s summer leading up to him leaving Derry.

Seb really has no choice in who he hangs out with, no one really wants to talk to him because of who he’s related to and because who he hangs out with. Although when he says hang out it really means he stands in the background and says nothing while his cousin Vic and his friends bully some poor kid in their sight. 

Because you’re related to someone in the Bowers gang it seems everyone thinks you behave like them. He doesn’t beat up and target poor innocent people trying to go about their day. But maybe he’s just as bad as them because although he doesn’t bully their poor victims he doesn’t seem to say anything to stop them, he has no courage to speak up and tell them it’s wrong what they’re doing...he just lets it happen. 

They don’t really speak to him, they just let him string along because he’s Vic’s cousin, they’d probably rather not have some puny little kid hang out with them but what can they do? They have no choice otherwise Vic would get shit from his parents. 

The Bowers gang usually targeted anyone who was quiet or seen as dorky (so him if he wasn’t related to Vic) a small group seemed to be their main target Bill Denbrough also known as stuttering Bill, Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie Tozier and Stanley Uris. They seemed like nice people so it was unfair that they were a constant target, although it seemed Henry was giving Bill a free pass due to his little brother going missing. 

One day Seb sat on a wall while the group were doing usual stupid shit, at the moment it seemed they had a lighter and were setting their farts on fire, disgusting. He was looking over his maths homework which he knew he would have to do later once he gets home as he let them do their stupid shit. 

“Hey flamer where do you think you’re going?!” Called out Patrick, as Seb looked up from his book he looked to see Stanley Uris clutching onto his backpack and rushing to quickly get past the group. As Stan went to quickly get past, Vic put his leg out and the poor boy tripped, landing face first into the ground.

He tried to scramble onto his feet in a panic as Belch and Patrick grabbed hold of Stan before Henry made his way over to him. He watched as him and Vic looked at each other before turning to look at him “Hey Seb wanna be useful for once?” Called out Henry as he looked at him with a smirk.

Seb stayed where he was “did you not hear me? Get your ass up and hit him!” Now barked Henry as Seb hesitantly got off the wall and made his way over, he really didn’t want to do this and he was pretty sure Stan didn’t deserve this. He looked at the group who had smirks on their faces as they held Stan in place for him before he looked over at Stan. His eyes were wide and terrified like he was begging him to please not hurt him. 

He can’t do this, he’s not a violent person and he’s not going to hurt someone who doesn’t deserve it just because they want some entertainment. “No” said Seb quietly. They all stopped, looking at him with surprise that Seb was actually speaking up for once and was going against Henry’s orders...you never go against Henry.  
“What did you say?” He said, his voice lowered which almost made Seb tremble a little with fear.

‘Be brave Seb’ he thought to himself as he clenched his fist. “I said no!” He spat next as without even thinking he shoved Belch and Patrick off Stan which took them all by surprise. Stan quickly got up, scrambling to his feet and ran for his life down the street while the gang stood in shock.

“Why did you do that?!” Barked Vic as he turned to his cousin.  
“H-he doesn’t deserve it!” Responded Seb as the fear now began to kick in, this can’t be good.  
Next thing he knew Henry shoved him onto the floor causing him to fall back, he curled up into a ball as he prepared to get the shit beaten out of him “fucking pussy!” He spat before they all turned to walk away. Seb curled out of his ball as the looked at the group walking away.

Probably if he wasn’t Vic’s cousin that would have ended differently, he watched as they walked away before Vic quickly turned to look back at him, shaking his head is disappointment before he joined the group.

He now has no one, he’s got no one to look out for him and no friends. 

..........

Few hours later Seb decided to go to the diner alone, there was a movie playing tonight at the Derry movie theatre but he didn’t want to go. It was some sort of werewolf movie but he wasn’t into those kinds of things especially after his fear of zombies developed when one time the Bowers gang put on this really disgusting zombie movie, the thought of it now gives him shivers. 

He hadn’t ordered anything yet, he just decided to sit there. After today and the realisation that he now has no one he wanted to cry, what if he becomes a target to the Bowers gang too? What if school now becomes a nightmare because no one will want to talk to him knowing that he was a background in the Bowers gang.

“Hey um...” started a voice causing Seb to look up with surprise, it was Stan.  
“I just wanted to say thanks...for back there, no one has ever helped me out before” he said nervously, giving an awkward smile.  
“It’s okay” Responded Seb.  
He watched as Stan looked back at the empty booth he was sitting in before looking back at him.  
“Can I sit here?” He asked which took Seb by surprise, he was technically part of the Bowers gang so why would he want to sit with him?

“Um, Y-yeah” Responded Seb nervously as Stan entered the booth with a soft smile on his face. “I’m Stan” he said as he held his hand out for him to shake  
“S-Sebastian but most call be Seb” he responded as he took Stan’s hand, his hand felt soft in his and he felt like he felt some sort of electricity travel through him.

They pulled away from the hand shake and Stan gave him another soft smile “Sebastian’s a nice name” he said causing Seb to smile back, feeling his cheeks begin to feel a little warm. Now he was able to get a better look at Stan’s face, his brown eyes, soft brown curls of his hair and his cute little smile...did he really just think cute smile? 

They ended up ordering an ice cream to share at they sat in the booth. Watching as Stan’s spoon would leave his mouth and go back into the bowl, they were practically kissing...just without their lips touching. He shouldn’t be thinking these things, Stan could possibly become a friend or just someone he can talk to when he doesn’t have anyone. 

Even after the ice cream they talked for a while, he found out that Stan had went to the movie theatre today with Eddie, Bill and Richie but decided to go into the diner afterwards when he saw him through the window while the others headed home. He found out a few things about him too such as Stan really likes birds, has two of his own and likes to bird watch in his spare time, it’s sweet. Seb told him a few things about himself such as comics he likes to read and stuff like that, Stan likes comics too but he said it mostly Richie and Eddie’s thing.

Seb ended up walking Stan home that night as it turned out he didn’t live too far from him, just a street away from his home apparently. He stood at the front porch as Stan gave a soft smile and waved goodbye before entering his home. Seb loudly exhaled, he felt like his heart was doing little flips right now and he couldn’t explain it.

When he arrived back at home that night so many thoughts were going through his head. He likes girls, he’s crushed on girls in his class...so why is he suddenly feeling these feelings for a boy, a very cute boy for that matter. He kept thinking about Stan’s curls on his head, him eating the ice cream and the cute little smiles he gave him.

He paced up and down his room a little, he was so confused with how he was feeling and he now felt like he was questioning things about himself he’s never questioned before. He stopped his pacing and decided he should probably get some sleep, he can think about this tomorrow.

......  
The last day before they finish for summer was pretty quiet, he did everything he could to avoid the Bowers gang that day. He’d rather not confront them especially after yesterday stunt with them even if it is for the best that he no longer hangs out with them.

He never wanted to hang out with them in the first place, he was just so desperate not to be alone in school that he took the opportunity and it seemed better to have the Bowers gang on your side than to be a target to them. If he was honest he was like everyone else, downright scared of them he’s heard rumours about messed up shit they’ve done and he honestly believes the rumours.

In class today he witnessed Henry Bowers go over to Ethan Davis’ notebook and scribble all over it, flicking over the pages and digging the pen into the paper as he scribbled. It was mean, he always saw that boy walking around clutching that red book in his hands, it’s private. 

The look on Ethan’s face when he came back to his table was heartbreaking if he was honest. Flicking through the pages and looking on the verge of tears as he looked around the class. He ended up taking his things and leaving the class, the teacher calling out for him and Henry laughing the fucking shitbag. 

Part of him wanted to follow Ethan but he didn’t know him, he’s never spoken to him so who’s to say he’d be able to make the kid feel better? He continued on with his work but he felt this anger inside him, in a way with all the children going missing he wishes Bowers was one of them.

At the end of the day it was finally summer and in a way Seb was relieved, finally he could have time to himself where he didn’t have to think about school and the stupid dramas of it, he can just relax.

As he walked out of school he noticed the Bowers gang harassing Bill, Eddie, Richie and Stan again but it was quickly put to a stop because Henry’s dad was there. Betty Ripsom’s mom was standing outside the school too with the police obviously hoping that Betty would come out of school but no one had heard from her, no one had seen her. 

Seb sighed before clutching his backpack and walking back home. 

........

At one point in the summer his mom asked him to go out and get some air because she was sick and tired of him sitting in the house all day. She suggested going to hang out with Vic but Seb downright refused, never again will he hang out with those people. From what he had heard Patrick Hockstetter had gone missing, if he was honest he’s probably more of a psychopath than Henry from what he had seen and heard...has he gone missing because he wished it on Henry? 

He was currently sitting in the park, on the bench alone.  
“Sebastian” he heard a whisper, he thought he was hearing things at first as he looked around, for a park that’s in the summer it was strangely empty. “Find us Sebastian” he definitely heard it that time. Find who? It sounded like a child’s voice, a whisper.

He got up off the bench and started to look around for the source of the voice as he continued walking it sounded like it was coming from below him. “Sebastian” the whisper said coming out louder. That’s when he noticed the ground below him start to break, parts of it opening up as a rotted hand rose up out of the ground and reached up to grab his leg.

A loud gasp left him as he fell onto his back, more parts of the ground breaking apart as more rotted, zombified hands grabbed at him. The feel of the rotten flesh touching him was enough to make him want to throw up, he tried to scream out but it felt like his screams where stuck in his throat.

He tried to wriggle out of the grab, feeling the feeling skin of the rotten hands drag against his skin, he wanted to cry at the feeling. He kicked and kicked until he had the courage to stomp on one of the hands causing it to let go. He continued moving until the hands let go of him and he quickly got to his feet.

As he got up he stopped mid tracks as he saw a Red balloon, a singular red balloon floating but someone was behind it. Slowly the balloon rose up into the sky to reveal a clown with bright orange hair and a big toothy grin.

“It seems you found them Sebastian” The clown said as Seb stared back with wide eyes, a shakey breath leaving his throat.  
“Come join the clown Seb! You’ll float down there, we all float down there!” It said before it started to laugh hysterically and Seb felt like he could finally scream as he started to run as fast as he could. 

Seb continued to run and scream and he’s sure he screamed at one point “there’s a fucking clown chasing me!” But he’s not so sure, he did get some funny looks though. He ended up running into the door of the diner, his face slamming into it causing him to stop in his tracks, that fucking hurt.

He rubbed his nose before with a shakey hand grabbed for the door and pulled it open, moving to sit at one of the booths at the back away from prying eyes that just watched that embarrassing moment. 

As he sat down one of the waitress made their way over to them with a little notepad “Can I get you anything kid?” She asked as she looked back at the door he slammed into.  
“Um just a water please” he said as he felt his cheeks heat up with embarrassment. The waitress nodded before walking away to get his glass of water.

He still felt like he was shaking after what happened, what the fuck was that? What was with the zombie hands? And what was with the clown? That couldn’t have been real right? Everyone was looking at him like he was crazy so no one else must have seen it.

The waitress came back with his glass of water and Seb gave a quiet thanks before looking at the group of boys entering the diner. It was a whole group of them Bill, Richie, Eddie, the new kid, Ben he thinks his name is and Stan. He watched as they climbed into one of the booths and Stan sat now facing him from his booth.

Stan looked up at him before giving a little shy smile and lifting his hand a little to wave at him. Seb waved back in return before Stan smiled again and turned to talk to his friends. Seb suddenly felt calm after what happened back there, he still felt nauseous at the feel of the rotten flesh touching him but now he felt calm the moment Stan had came into the diner.

Fuck, he has a crush

......  
“Sebastian get down here!” Called his mom. Seb sighed, climbing off his bed before making his way down the stairs to his mom in the living room.

“Look at that boy” she said as she pointed out the window. It was Ethan Davis from next door, sitting on his porch, staring into space. “That poor boy looks bored out of his mind! He looks your age go and play with him!” She suggested.  
“But mom I’ve never spoken to him?”  
“-well bows your chance! I’m sick and tired of walking past your bedroom and seeing you doing nothing all day! Go out and play with that boy!” She ordered as she turned him around and practically pushed him out the door.

How the fuck is he supposed to introduce himself to a boy in his class he’s never even spoken to? although come to think of it...has anyone actually ever spoken to Ethan? 

He made his way to Ethan’s house before standing right in front of him. The boy looked up at him confused, maybe he should introduce himself?  
“My mom said I have to play with you” nice work Seb. The boy looked back at him surprised before he stuttered an awkward “o-okay”.

Seb moved to sit next to Ethan on his porch, this was awkward.  
“I’m Seb”  
“E-Ethan” they both awkwardly reached out and shook hands before it was quiet again. He never thought talking to new people would be so hard.  
“Soooo” started Seb as he slowly leaned back a little.  
“You like comics?” He asked as he looked at his own hands.  
“Y-yeah they’re cool” Muttered Ethan.  
“Cool....wanna hit the comic book store?” He asked next as he turned to look at Ethan.  
Ethan shrugged his shoulders “sure” he responded quietly as they both got up and walked to the comic book store together.

They spent a while in the comic book store, talking about the comics they have read and their favourite heroes before they explored Derry. It became a lot less awkward very quickly, they laughed and joked and Seb couldn’t remember the last time he enjoyed being in someone else’s company (apart from Stan). 

Turns out his mom forcing him to talk to Ethan was a great idea because he really enjoyed hanging out with him. As summer continued Seb would knock on Ethan’s door and Ethan would knock on his, he had never seen his mom so happy that he had a friend to hang out with. 

One time they were in a field close to the kissing bridge. They both lay on the grass as they looked up at the sky, pointing out clouds and the objects they looked similar too. Friends tell each other everything right? They don’t keep secrets?

“Can I tell you something...but you have to promise not to laugh” started Seb as he turned his head to look at Ethan, Ethan turned his head back.  
“Okay” He responded before they both turned to look at the clouds again. Okay here goes nothing he thought as he nervously swallowed.  
“Few days before I met you I was chased by a clown....it was really scary but it was like it was something else, it transformed into a zombie...I hate zombies” he confessed, it went awfully silent between them both but there was no sigh of Ethan laughing or any sigh that he was about to burst out laughing.

“I’m surprised you’re not laughing” said Seb as the silence broke between them.  
“t-that’s because I believe you” he responded back causing Seb to lift himself up on his elbows as he turned to look at Ethan, what? He actually believes him? Well that’s a surprise because if he was Ethan he’d think it’s complete bullshit or some sort of joke.  
“I um...I saw the clown too, it chased after me and said some really mean things, even scribbled mean things in my notebook” he explained.  
“What did IT say?”  
“I don’t really wanna talk about it” he said quietly. Holy shit, Ethan was chased by this clown too? In a way he thought he might have been imagining things because of how everyone was looking at him when he was basically sprinting across Derry before he embarrassingly slammed face first into the diner door. If he was honest he was scared, it was like it was feeding off his fear...what if it comes back? What if it torments him for something else? Like his crush on Stan? Maybe if he tells Ethan then he won’t be so scared anymore about his feelings and whatever this is.

“I’m scared Ethan...it’s like it was feeding from my fear, I don’t want IT to feed on anymore of my fears...which is why I’m about to tell you this” he explained, Ethan sat up now and so did Seb. They now sat side by side next to each other in the field.

He nervously swallowed as he spoke up again.  
“Recently I’ve been confused, like I’ve been questioning things about myself that I’ve never thought about before...I um...I like girls, I’ve had a crush on girls in my classes before but” he started. Ethan kept silent, looking back at him with encouragement and reassurance, it made him feel a little at ease.

“I’ve um met someone I’ve started crushing on...I....I like Stanley Uris” he confessed.  
“Okay” Responded Ethan.  
“No I really, REALLY like Stanley Uris” he said, emphasising the word really.  
“And that’s okay” Responded Ethan, a smile began to form on Seb’s face...he’s okay with this? He’s not going to laugh or judge him?  
“Really?”  
“Really” that’s when Seb pulled Ethan into a hug, he was so scared to tell him but now he’s never felt so relieved.  
“I really like Bella Morgan” confessed Ethan, obviously trying to make him feel better about having a crush but it made Seb chuckle.  
“Thats pretty obvious” he responded with a smirk.  
Ethan pulled away from the hug as he looked at him. “What?” Thats when a smile spread on Seb’s face.  
“Before we started speaking in school I could see how you looked at her, you’re not very subtle Ethan”

........

He was currently in his room, looking through a comic Ethan had let him borrow before he heard a knock on his bedroom door.  
“Yeah!” He called out as his mom entered, she was awfully quiet as she came to sit down on his bed.  
“Sebastian...there’s something I need to tell you, could you close the comic please?” She said, her voice was very quiet and Seb knew that something was up.

Seb closed the comic book before looking up at his mom. “Um...I don’t really know how to tell you this but...Henry Bowers has been arrested...he’s murdered his father and they think he has been involved in the disappearance of the other children in Derry” she started, oh wow, Seb can’t say that he’s surprised that Henry has been arrested for murder but he’s pretty sure Henry doesn’t have anything to do with the missing children...he thinks that was the clown.

“T-there’s more.....Reginald and Vic...were found dead in his car” she said and Seb felt like the whole world stopped, Henry murdered his cousin? His cousin is dead? Seb felt this sickness and sudden pain inside him. His cousin his dead, the last time he properly saw his cousin he had shook his head at him in disappointment for defending Stan.

Seb didn’t say anything, he climbed off his bed and headed down the stairs. He’s pretty sure his mom was watching him wondering where he was going but he paid no attention. He opened the front door he didn’t think as made his way to Ethan’s front garden, he wanted to see Ethan, he wanted his friend. 

He found a rock on the ground before he picked it up and threw it at his window. He looked up as Ethan poked his head at the window and put a finger up to indicate he’ll be just a second before he was gone. Seb made his way to the door, now feeling the sobs beginning to kick in and make his body feel heavy as he dragged his feet to the door.

As the door opened Ethan’s smile dropped as he looked back at him.  
“H-Henry B-Bowers has been a-arrested....h-he killed V-Vic” he said, voice jumpy and uncontrollable with sobs, he had no control of his voice anymore.  
Ethan looked back at him, eyes wide before he pulled him into a hug. He collapsed into Ethan’s arms, sobbing loudly and heavily as he clutched onto Ethan’s shirt.

He stayed at Ethan’s that night, he gave him some of his own pjs and he was pretty sure his mom came to the door at one point before Ethan explained that Seb wants to stay the night. His mom likes Ethan, always telling him how she thinks he’s such a sweet boy and a perfect example of someone he should be friends with. Well she was right because Ethan now climbed onto the bed with him, facing each other. His brown eyes looking back at him as he took Seb’s hand and held it tightly.

“What’s going through your mind?” He asked. Seb swallowed as he looked at Ethan’s hand holding his before he looked back up at him “that could have been me too...I was hanging out with them at one point...he could have killed me too”  
“But he didn’t” said Ethan softly as it went quiet again.

“God he was such an asshole to people including me but....but I miss him” he said as he felt this throat grow weak and tears begin to build up again.  
“I know...it’s okay to miss him, he’s still your family” Responded Ethan before Seb began to cry again. Ethan shuffled closer, wrapping his arms around Seb as he cried his heart out. Ethan kept hold of him, rubbing his shoulder as he comforted him.

They spent the rest of the time talking about anything and everything, he thinks it was Ethan’s idea to try and distract him from the news of his cousin. For that night it helped but now it’s always going to be with him, knowing that Bowers killed Vic. He can’t remember if he slept that night but he knows that Ethan stayed with him the whole time and that’s all he needed.

........

The first day back at school was pretty hard. When he entered all he could hear was people talking about Henry Bowers and what he did, he’s not surprised because of course it’s going to be the talk of the school he murdered his father and two others and now they’re pinning the missing children on him too, although him and Ethan know that the missing children is something completely different.

As he got further into school he wondered if this was such a good idea and maybe he should just turn back around and skip school for the day. That’s when he noticed Ethan rushing to the bathroom, clutching onto his backpack tightly and looking on the verge of tears. 

Seb looked around and that’s when he saw it, Bella Morgan and Eddie Kaspbrak by her locker, holding hands. Oh no....poor Ethan, Seb followed Ethan into the bathroom.

“Ethan? Ethan you in here?” He called out, he could hear little sniffles coming from one of the stalls.  
“I’m okay! I’m fine! I just need a minute” Called out Ethan in response, that was clearly a lie he’s just had his heart broken.  
“No you’re not, I just saw Bella and Eddie” he said as he leaned against the stall and slid down to sit on the floor.  
“Look...if Bella can’t see you for the kind and caring person that you are that I have grown to know, the one that accepted me for liking both girls and boys and the one who didn’t make fun of me over the clown situation...then she’s not worth it Ethan” explained Seb, he got to know Ethan over the summer and he is one of the sweetest people he’s ever met, who was there for him at a really tough time. If Bella couldn’t see that then it’s her loss.

“She’ll always be worth it...it doesn’t matter if she’s with Eddie...I’d still look out for her, I’d still protect her even if she doesn’t feel the same as I do about her” he said as Seb sighed and it went quiet again. Of course he’d be like that about her, anyone could fucking see the way he feels about her and even though she’s broke his heart he’s still head over heels for her.  
“Listen...lets just skip school today”  
Suggested Seb.  
“But we have class-“  
“-so? Do you wanna wanna go through today feeling like this? I know I wouldn’t”  
“But its a school year, it’s the first day of class”  
“Then let’s make your first day tomorrow, use today to collect yourself and come back tomorrow as the better person, the strong one” said Seb as Ethan went silent again.  
“What about you? H-how are you holding up?” Asked Ethan, it hadn’t been that long since Seb lost his cousin. He sighed before shrugging his shoulders  
“I’m okay....I guess, but it’s just one of those things were I need to continue on, I can’t let the world stop around me because my cousin is gone” he said muttering a little at the last part.  
“I guess we both could use one more day away from school...so what do you say? You up for skipping school today?” Seb asked.

He heard Ethan sniffling before whispering a “Okay”.  
He got up as he heard Ethan unlocking the door, as he turned to face him Ethan’s eyes were a little red and puffy from crying so he pulled him into a hug. Ethan rested his head on Seb’s shoulder as he wrapped his arms around him. 

The hug was only brief and quick before they pulled away and Seb placed an arm over his shoulder as they walked out of the bathroom and out of school.

........

Sebastian didn’t leave Derry until he got a letter in the mail that he got into the college of his choice.  
His mom suggested that they move of out Derry before the semester starts, the place held too many bad memories and it seemed like a chance to start over.

It was a different college to Ethan’s choice so it seemed that they’d be going their separate ways which hurt he must admit but he hopes that they’d meet again one day. Turns out Ethan was also packing his backs as he was packing his.


	4. Chapter Four - Marcus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Marcus’ summer leading up to him leaving Derry.

Marcus couldn’t really understand what had happened. There he was standing in the main entrance of the movie theatre watching his best friend scream and cry in fear while Ethan Davis held her and promised her that she’s okay and that she’s safe. 

A lot of things were going through his mind first of all Bella, of course Bella is the first thing going through his head. What happened? Why was she in a closed off room? And what had made her scream and panic so much? He felt useless as he stood there watching her cry her eyes out. 

The second thing that was going through his mind was quiet boy Ethan Davis. He had only spoke to them today because Bella offered him a seat but the way he held her, the way he caresses her cheeks so that she could look into his eyes, the way he was so protective of her. Hell, even him running to the door to grab her the moment he heard her screaming without even thinking about what’s on the other side. He doesn’t know why the way Ethan held Bella played on his mind so much.

“Hey lets get out of here Yeah? Before assholes start coming out” spoke up Marcus as he walked over to help pull Bella up onto her feet.   
They all walked to Bella’s home together, Ethan had walked them both up to the door before Marcus said he’d take over. He offered Ethan and thank you before the boy gave a soft smile and walked back home. Marcus couldn’t help but watch the boy walk away, something about him playing in his mind.

Marcus helped Bella to her room because she was still in a state of shock as he made his way over to her dresser and began to search for some pjs for her, she took the pjs before quietly making her way to her bathroom to get changed as Marcus sat on her bed waiting.

It was quiet as Bella came back in the room, walking over to join Marcus on the bed.  
“What happened?” Started Marcus because he felt like he had a right to know, he had never seen his best friend so terrified. Bella went to open her mouth before closing it again. Marcus raised his eyebrows at her as he waited for a response from her.

“I’m...I’m not ready to talk about it” she said as she began to play with the sleeves of her pj shirt. Marcus sighed as he leaned forward a little “I’m sorry I didn’t do a lot to help” he apologised as Bella looked back at him.  
“Well you’re here now?”  
“But Ethan was the one who saved you” he said as Bella looked back down at her sleeves.  
“If anything seems quiet Ethan Davis was your knight in shining armour Bells” he said as he saw a small smile appear on her face.  
“I guess he was” she whispered.

Marcus ended up staying the night at Bella’s and they shared the bed like they always do, Bella put her old night light on for Marcus but he wonders if it was for her too after whatever had happened back at the movie theatre. Whatever reason he always appreciates Bells looking out for him.

“Goodnight Bells”  
“Goodnight Mucus” Marcus scoffed at the nickname as he snuggled up into bed.

Marcus woke up the next day to a pillow smacking him in the face “you have to go! I need to get ready for school!” Called out Bella as she opened her dresser draws to look for something to wear.  
“Okay, okay I’ll go! See ya later Bells!” He said as he climbed off the bed and left the bedroom, still in last nights clothes. Although his tired dumbass didn’t seem to notice the first step as he tripped, grabbing the banister before he could fall down. 

“What was that?!” Called out Bella’s mom as he paused and looked towards the kitchen.  
“Hi Mrs Morgan!” He said as he finally came down the stairs to Bella’s mom raising her eyebrows at him he didn’t wait for her to question why he stayed the night.  
“I’ll be out of your hair Mrs Morgan” he said as he made his way out the door to get ready for school.

School was a little awkward today, because their was tension between them after what happened yesterday. Bella didn’t want to talk about it and Marcus was still completely clueless about what happened to his friend.

They spent lunch outside seeing as the weather was nice and it was the last day before summer. Although he didn’t notice the red book next to Bella until he turned to look at her holding it. Bella turned to look at Marcus as he raised an eyebrow at her.  
“We can’t look it’s rude!” She said  
“They won’t know!” He responded as he reached forward to snatch the book from her hands.  
She shook her head as she turned away. Well Marcus was going to have a look and didn’t care if it was rude or nosy. As he did he was welcomed by drawings that has been scribbled all over, under the scribbles they were pretty good drawings. Either this kid has some anger issues or someone else did this if that was the case it was most likely one of the Bowers gang members to scribble on the pages.

“Man some asshole really did a number on this guys drawings, scribbled black shit all over them....Bells?” The last drawing in the book made him pause, he was one faced with an incredibly realistic drawing of Bella.   
“You need to look at this” he said as Bella curiously turned her head, before her eyes went wide. He watched as her eyes examined the drawing, he could see the a look of amazement in her eyes and her cheeks going a little pink.

“Is that me?” She said  
“Either that or a strong look alike, Bella Morgan has a secret admirer” he smirked as he put the book down. People who he suspected to have drawn the picture started to cross his mind but he had a feeling he knew exactly who had drawn it.

........

“Can we talk about what happened yesterday? At the movie theatre” spoke up Marcus as they sat on his front porch. He watched as Bella sighed, holding her now shaking hands together as she spoke up.

“I saw a balloon in the movie theatre...I followed it and it led me to the corridor that you and Ethan found me in...there was a clown...everything felt wrong and scary and I just ran, the corridor grew longer and longer and the walls began to close it on me, and I thought I was going to die” she explained before growing silent, what? Clowns? Balloons? Walls closing in? She had a strange sense of humour he’ll give her that. Marcus started to laugh at her ridiculous story as she turned to look at him.

His smile dropped when he noticed how angry she looked “you’re serious?” He said with amusement in his voice.  
“Of course I’m serious!”  
“Oh come on Bells do you expect me to believe that?!”  
“Yes because you’re my friend! You saw how scared I was!”  
“You sure it’s not because you were scared of the movie?” He said with a smirk.  
Bella bit her tongue before she shook her head as she got up “I know it sounds crazy but I hoped you of all people would believe me” she said as she stood up to face him.  
“I’m sorry Bells but-“  
“Don’t call me that!....don’t talk to me and don’t be asking me to hang out” she said quietly as she turned towards her house, stomping away with her fists clenched at her sides. Marcus called after her as she entered the house but she showed no signs of listening to him.

Marcus sighed as he closed his eyes...he’s fucked up. It sounds ridiculous her story, does she really expect him to believe that? It sounds crazy. Is it some sort of killer clown? He’s not heard anything about a clown terrorising people in Derry. He saw how terrified she was as Ethan tried to calm her down but a clown terrorising her and closing the walls in on her can’t be right, this is like something you’d hear in a nightmare and nightmares aren’t real. 

He turned around as he slowly entered his house, his chest feeling heavy with guilt...he could have dealt with it a lot better and now he’s lost a friend.

........

His mom had told him to get his ass out of bed and get some stuff from the store for her because apparently she was sick and tired of walking past his bedroom to see him in bed. Fuck he missed Bells, the missed how they’d hang out and laugh and joke, he missed her calling him Mucus over the walkie talkie. He missed everything about his best friend and it was his fault.

He hates going to the store, he hates how incredibly bright it is in there, the idea of bumping into someone he knows and the stupid fucking music that plays through the speakers. On his list was bread, milk and a few other things. He grabbed his basket and made his way around the store, collecting things before he noticed something red at the corner of his eye. As he peaked into one of the next isles he noticed a red balloon...Bella mentioned something about a balloon back at the movie theatre but a parade had been going on in Derry, the balloon was probably from there right? 

He shook his head as he continued on with his mom’s shopping before going to pay for the things. As he went to leave the store, bags in his hands he saw the balloon again, slowly making its way to the back door of the store. Now Marcus was intrigued, the back door was open and the balloon was slowly making its way there.

He started to follow the balloon, going to the back of the store before the balloon began to slowly go down the steps behind the door. He stopped as he saw how dark it was behind the door and down the stairs, almost like it led to a dark abyss.  
“Fuck that” Muttered Marcus as he turned back around and left the store.

As he walked away he looked back as he felt a strange uneasy feeling inside, he felt like his heart was racing as he walked away but he couldn’t explain why.

...... 

When he thinks about what had just happened this was definitely not what he had planned when he forced himself out of bed this morning. 

He was on his way back home as he spent the day wondering around Derry bored out of his mind before he saw Henry Bowers and his fucking goons, well two of them anyway. They were standing around talking before their eyes clocked the sight of Marcus walking alone.

“Where’s your girlfriend? Kind of hoping she’d be around!” Called out Bowers as Marcus scoffed and shook his head. Him and Bella still hadn’t spoke since Marcus basically laughed in her face, he still feels shitty about it but he doesn’t know how to go about apologising to her. 

“She’s not my girlfriend” Responded Marcus as he walked past them.  
“Sounds about right...the way she had her hands all over me” said Bowers causing Marcus to stop in his tracks. He could hear the other two snickering and three sets of eyes looking at him, feeling like they were burning into the back of his head.

“Yeah...I saw the way she looked at me in school, once school was over she couldn’t help herself” Marcus clenched his fist as he heard Henry start to walk over to him. He’s bullshitting, Bella isn’t like that...how dare he speak about her that way.   
“You’re full of shit” spat Marcus, back still turned, causing Belch and Vic to start laughing.  
“Am I? Or are you just jealous she hasn’t had a turn on you? I bet I’m not the only one” Marcus could feel the anger inside him, he refuses to have Bella’s life made a living hell over lies and poison Henry Bowers and his goons spread...like Beverly Marsh. 

“She’ll do you, all you have to do is ask....that’s what I did” Marcus could hear his fucking smirk as Bowers now stood right behind him. That was it, without thinking Marcus turned around and swung his fist, hitting Bowers directly in the face causing him to fall back. 

He watched as Bowers stood up, complete shock on his face which amused him, he made Henry Bowers shocked but his actions. He watched as Bowers spat out blood from his mouth, fucking piece of shit deserved it. 

“Piece of shit!” Spat Henry as he shoved Marcus onto the floor.   
Stepping back as Vic and Belch watched in the back, seems this was just for Henry, now that Marcus really has made an enemy.  
“You wanna fight?” He said as Marcus turned to look up at him.  
“Don’t be a little fucking bitch, get up and fight me!” He spat as Marcus got up onto his feet.

As he was about to swing for him again a fist collided with his face causing Marcus to fall back onto the ground. Next he felt Henry Bowers on top of him, grabbing him by the shirt before he started repetitively punching him. Marcus tried to fight back but every punch was causing more pain making him feel weaker. 

He tried to push Bowers back but he was too weak, smaller compared to him.  
“Leave him alone!” Called out a girl’s voice. Both turned to look in the direction of the voice. Three people stood there Beverly Marsh, Richie Tozier and Eddie Kaspbrak.

He looked back at Marcus before looking over at the group, seems he was not in the mood to fight them as he let go of his shirt, shoving Marcus to the ground as he called him a fucking loser before him, Vic and Belch walked away.

Marcus groaned as he closed his eyes, listening to the sound of footsteps making their way over to him. “Holy shit dude you punched Henry Bowers in the face!” Exclaimed Richie as Marcus opened his eyes again. As he did he saw three people looking down at him “You okay?” Asked Beverly before she held out her hand for him.

“Face hurts” Muttered Marcus as he accepted her hand before she pulled him up and they took him aside to find somewhere to sit.  
Beverly held both sides of his face as she examined the damage “his nose is bleeding” she said.

“Well this calls for the treatment of the one and only Doctor Ed’s get in there boy!” Said Richie in the most terrible cockney accent he has ever heard.   
“Shut up” Responded Eddie as he unzipped his fanny pack as he searched around for things.  
“I need tissues” he muttered.  
“What for?”  
“His nose! It’s bleeding!”

“Tip your head back” Said Richie before Marcus tipped it back a little.  
“No don’t do that!” Responded Eddie as he pushed Marcus’ head back down.  
“You’re supposed to tip your head back to stop the blood from dripping out-“  
“-then you’ll be swallowing the blood!” Argues Eddie.  
“Tip it back it’s fine-“  
“- no you don’t tip it back or you’ll swallow the blood! Blood doesn’t agree with the stomach”  
“He’ll be fine”  
“- I know what I’m talking about genius!”   
“Why what happens?”  
“It makes you throw up dumbass!”  
“Have you ever thrown up from swallowing blood?”  
“No because I don’t tip my head back like you asshole!” Spat Eddie, doing this little hand thing as he argued with Richie.  
He watched as they bickered and argued while he pinched his nose before turning to look at Beverly who looked completely fed up with them before she pulled a tissue out of her pocket and handing it over to him.

Marcus gave a muffled thanks and he took the tissue and placed it over his nose. The two had finally stopped bickering as Eddie went back over to Marcus, face close as he pinched just below the bridge of Marcus’ nose.

“You sure you’re doing it right?” Said Richie  
“Of course I’m doing it right! You pinch just below the bridge of the nose because it helps to stop the bleeding!” He Responded back before Eddie looked back at Marcus. If he’s honest he understands why Bella is attracted to him as Eddie’s big brown eyes looked back at him.

Seeing him close up he can see that Eddie does have a cute little face he thinks to himself as Eddie’s eyes scanned his face for any other damage. “Is he gonna be okay?” Asked Beverly as Eddie’s eyes looked at his “he’s got a black eye but he should be okay we just need ice” Explained Eddie as he kept his eyes on him before moving the tissue away once he was sure the bleeding had stopped. His face looked grossed out as he took the tissue before running to the nearby bin to throw the tissue away.

“Think my mom has ice in her freezer” Said Richie as they all stood up. They decided to head to Richie’s, Bev and Eddie got on their bikes while Marcus sat on the back of Richie’s. Some reason he could feel himself blushing a little as he wrapped his arms around Richie, holding on tight as they made their way to his house. 

Once they had arrived they all sat on Richie’s pouch while Richie ran in to get some ice. “So what happened?” asked Beverly.  
“He was saying things....disgusting things that aren’t true about Bella” explained Marcus.  
“Bella Morgan?” Asked Eddie, now sounding concerned.  
“Yeah he said sexual things about her and I guess I just snapped” he continued as he looked at his fist, if he’s honest it actually hurts a little after punching Bowers.  
“Tried to spread rumours?” Asked Beverly as Marcus nodded his head.  
“I know how that feels” Muttered Beverly, Marcus never believed the rumours about Beverly where as a lot of people did, he always suspected it had something to do with Bowers. 

“Your ice had arrived Mr Hayes!” Exclaimed Richie in some stupid posh accent as he jumped out his door, holding a bag filled with ice causing Marcus to chuckle, Beverly to roll her eyes while Eddie shook his head.

Richie walked over before kneeling in front of Marcus and placing the ice bag over his eye. “Sorry that you’re not getting full view of all of this!” Smirked Richie as he indicated towards his own face causing Marcus to chuckle a little and his cheeks to warm up. He reached his hand up to now take hold of the bag, brushing against Richie’s hand for a second causing his face to now feel warmer. What is wrong with him? Why is fucking Richie Tozier making him feel like this?

Richie moved to sit next to Marcus on the step.  
“Bowers was talking bad about Bella Morgan” started Beverly  
“Oh Eddie’s play date?”  
“Shut up Richie!”  
Richie shrugged his shoulders “anyway it’s about time someone hit him, you’ve got balls” he said causing Marcus to smile a little as he muttered a little thanks. 

Eddie moved back to face Marcus again as he pulled the bag a little away from his face to examine the eye. “Swelling has gone down but your eye will be bruised for a while” he said before taking the bag of ice away that was now beginning to melt. 

“Does she know what’s been said?” Asked Beverly as Marcus shook his head.  
“Are you gonna tell her?” Asked Eddie.  
“I don’t know, me and Bella...we’ve kind of fell out” he sighed as he looked at his bruised fist.  
“You should talk to her, try and work things out, he might have been doing it to get a reaction from you but if Henry does say things she gonna need you on her side” said Beverly as Marcus gave a sad smile.  
“She’s got us too” joined in Eddie as he gave a smile back.  
“Yeah” Muttered Richie.  
“Thanks guys...and for helping me out, you didn’t need to”   
“Hey you punched Henry Bowers you deserve all the awards!” Exclaimed Richie causing everyone to start laughing, maybe he’ll go down in history for being the first one to give Henry a taste of his own medicine...even if he did lose. He’s now also questioning why he feels an attraction to Richie Tozier, maybe it’s his sense of humour.

......

“Mom my lamps not working” Called out Marcus as he flicked the switch on and off. This could not be happening, he needs his lamp, of course it would decide to break on him.  
“You’ll just have to sleep without it tonight!” Responded his mom  
“I can’t!”   
“Marcus I don’t have any other lamps, I’ll look for one tomorrow” 

Fuck it he’s sleeping with the bedroom light on by the looks of things. He lay back in bed while he waited for his mom to come in, shaking her head as she saw the bedroom light on “oh come on Marcus, you’re thirteen, you’re too old to be scared of the dark it’s silly” she said as she turned the light off and shut his door. 

He would have got up and turned it back on but now he was too scared to climb off his bed. He lay down in the darkness as he stared up at the ceiling, trying to think of something, anything to distract him from the darkness around him. 

“Marcus” said a faint whisper causing his eyes to widen, he was hearing things right?   
“Marcus” there it was again.   
“Come float with us” the voices whispered and he felt himself go short of breath, he must be hallucinating. 

He swallowed as he closed his eyes, slowly counting to five to himself before slowly opening his eyes. The voice is in his head, he’s just paranoid because he’s in the dark. As he opened his eyes something reached up and grabbed him, causing him to yell out. He went to move before he felt something else grab him, it felt like multiple sets of sharp hands grabbing at his arms, legs, torso. 

“Help! Help!” He yelled out but he got no response, the claws began to dig into his body causing him to cry out as he tried to move away and pull out their grasp. That’s when he noticed a dark shadow, the sound of movement from under his bed. He began to whimper as he saw the shadow get bigger and bigger, he could feel warm blood beginning to drip from the claws digging into his body along with sharp stings.

As he finally saw what the shadow was and he felt like his screams were trapped in his throat. A clown...it’s a clown, a clown like Bella has said, it laughed and yelled out as it grabbed Marcus, pinning him down on his bed. “Believe her now Marcus?” It grinned causing Marcus to cry out.   
“Such beautiful fear, you’ll do just fine” it said, voice so dark and sinister as it drooled, the saliva dripping down on him. The multiple sets of claws now scratching down his body, dragging down along with the clowns. He began to scream out in pain and sob for his mom as he closed his eyes. There was nothing, why wasn’t his mom coming to help him? 

“Oh mommy! Mommy” mimicked the clown causing Marcus to cry harder, tears streaming down his face while he cried out in fear and pain. He was going to die, maybe it’s what he deserves for not believing Bella....he tried to move but now he felt the sets of claws now pulling him down.

He wriggled and moved away from the hands, trying to fight back as he fell off the bed as the clown laughed at his weak attempt to get away. The clown now clawed at his ankles as he tried to reach for the door. He continued to cry out for his mom in hopes that his mom would hear him as he kicked and screamed in an attempt to get away from the clown.  
“Come float with us Marcus....we all float down here” it chuckled. 

Marcus know reached for the bedroom door and grabbed the door handle, as the clown’s arm was about to expend and grab him he got the door open. It seems his mom left the landing light on because now brightness entered his room and the clown was gone. 

Marcus collapsed onto the floor, shuffling into a corner in his bedroom, body shaking as he continued to sob. His whole body shaking and bleeding. Bella, he needs Bella...he was so sorry for not believing her, maybe he deserved what had just happened.

He stumbled onto his feet as he grabbed for the walkie talkie at his bedside before retreating back to the corner of the bedroom.  
“B-Bella are you there? I’m sorry Bella...I-I should have listened to you, y-you where right! You where so fucking right!” His words were babbled and came out his mouth fast as he called out for her. He didn’t know if she was listening but he continued “I heard a voice and S-something grabbed me in the dark under my bed, my lamp is broken and I-I I’m scared Bella!”

He had never felt so relieved to hear the sound of the static of the walkie talkie as Bella spoke “Hey Marcus it’s okay, hey it’s okay! I’ll be there!” she was gone again. Marcus looked at the blood now drying up on his pjs, he can’t let her see him like this. He walked over to his dresser draws and pulled out a fresh pair of pjs as he got dressed, getting a small glimpse at the scratches on his body. He stayed by his bedroom door as he waited for Bella, he assumed she’d knock at his front door, what he didn’t expect was to see her at his window, clutching the roof.

Marcus quickly made his way over to open the window for her “h-how?” He muttered as he stared at Bella clutching a part of the roof. He’s surprised, maybe she is more daring than he thought. He reached forward and helped to pull her in through his window before shutting it behind him. “Tell me what happened” she said first as Marcus began to pace the room.

“The bulb has gone in my lamp and I heard this voice...like-like a clown laughing and then it-it grabbed me from under my bed and started to pull at me...B-Bells I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for not believing you I-“ Marcus was tripping over his words, as he started to sob, hands covering his eyes as his body shook a little.

Bella rushed over to him as she pulled him into a hug, his arms quickly reaching out to wrap around her as he kept sobbing his apologies to her. “It’s okay, it doesn’t matter, you’re okay that’s the only thing that matters right now” she reassured him.

They stayed like that for a while as Marcus began to slowly calm down before pulling away from Bella and wiping his eyes. He couldn’t tell her the full extent of what happened, he couldn’t scare her like that. “What happened to your eye?” She asked as she pointed at the black eye.  
“Bowers” was all he said, again he couldn’t break it to her what had really happened.

“I brought something” she said with a soft smile as she searched for the plug sockets in his room, as she found one right by his bed she pulled a little nightlight out of her pocket and plugged it in.  
“Now you’ll always have a light even when your lamp is broken” she said as Marcus gave a sad smile, there she was, always looking out for him.

She spent the rest of the night at his, they didn’t really sleep but they stayed up most of the night and talked, they had missed speaking to each other so to finally be able to speak again felt like a wash of relief, summer had really sucked without each other. 

Bella had pulled him close while gently caressing his face “You okay?” She asked as Marcus nodded his head. She gave a sad smile while pulling him closer.  
“It’s a coward, to come after us in the dark...next time we’ll be ready to kick its ass” she said causing Marcus to laugh a little.  
“Bells and Mucus...we make quite a team” he said as she laughed back.  
“Yes we do”

They stayed together until the sun came up and Marcus had let Bella out through the front door so that she could go back home, their friendship after that felt like it always had been. The only difference was that ‘Bells and Mucus’ were ready to fight the clown if the fucker ever came back to hurt either of them.

.....

First day back at school was definitely interesting. Bells was now dating none other that little Eddie Kaspbrak, sure Eddie was sweet and really cute but something about them together just did not work out. It looked odd, they held hands and gave cheek kisses but it looked so fucking awkward.

All this relationship crap was making him sick, he headed into the bathroom and went to the last cubicle at the end of the bathroom. He was debating if to just stay in the cubicle and skip class, he didn’t really have the energy to go to class, that’s when he heard the sound of fast little feet entering and closing the one of the doors before the sound of sniffles filled the room. 

He was about to speak up and ask whoever it was if they were okay until he heard another pair of feet enter the bathroom.  
“Ethan? Ethan you in here?” It was Sebastian Miller. So Ethan is crying in the toilets?  
“I’m okay! I’m fine! I just need a minute” Called out Ethan.  
“No you’re not, I just saw Bella and Eddie” said Sebastian in response...Bella and Eddie? Ethan is upset about Bella and Eddie?

“Look...if Bella can’t see you for the kind and caring person that you are that I have grown to know, the one that accepted me for liking both girls and boys and the one who didn’t make fun of me over the clown situation...then she’s not worth it Ethan” oh my god...it’s so obvious now that he looks back, that’s why he couldn’t stop thinking about Ethan at the movie theatre, the way he was with Bella played on his mind. Ethan has a thing for her....was the drawing his? It would make sense. Also the fact that Sebastian had also been attacked by the clown? The thought was enough to make his hands tremble a little.

“She’ll always be worth it...it doesn’t matter if she’s with Eddie...I’d still look out for her, I’d still protect her even if she doesn’t feel the same way as I do about her” oh wow...Marcus actually felt his heart swell listening to this, this sounded like more than a crush and if he’s honest he couldn’t see Eddie being this protective over Bella.

“Listen...lets just skip school today”  
Suggested Seb.  
“But we have class-“  
“-so? Do you wanna wanna go through today feeling like this? I know I wouldn’t”   
“But its a school year, it’s the first day of class”  
“Then let’s make your first day tomorrow, use today to collect yourself and come back tomorrow as the better person, the strong one” said Seb as Ethan went silent again.  
“What about you? H-how are you holding up?” Asked Ethan, oh shit yeah, he heard what Bowers did the whole school is talking about it, he can’t be surprised.  
“I’m okay....I guess, but it’s just one of those things were I need to continue on, I can’t let the world stop around me because my cousin is gone” he said muttering a little at the last part.   
“I guess we both could use one more day away from school...so what do you say? You up for skipping school today?” Seb asked.  
He heard a sniffle before a cubicle door was unlocked and then the sound of footsteps leaving the bathroom.

Marcus exhaled as he fall back a little into the seat, that was a fucking lot to take in.

As it got to lunch he saw Richie at a table by himself with the most sour look on his face, it was cute to be honest, as he looked in Richie’s eye direction there was Bella and Eddie sitting at a table together. If anything he’d think Richie had a thing for Eddie.

Marcus didn’t even ask before he sat next to Richie “I know right? They look so awkward” Said Marcus as Richie turned to look at him.  
“He’s been holding her hand for ten fucking minutes but I don’t think they’ve said a fucking word!” Exclaimed Richie as he gestured in their direction.  
“What’s your reason for not liking them together anyway?” Asked Marcus and that’s when he noticed Richie stutter a little “I-I just think they’re not meant to be, they’re so fucking awkward they always have been!...what about you?” Asked Richie as Marcus shrugged his shoulders.  
“Same I just don’t think they’re meant to be...I know someone better suited to her” he muttered at the last part as then he thought about Ethan again. He thought about the way he held her close at the movie theatre, the drawing and how heartbroken he sounded back in the bathroom and even though Bella had basically broke his heart he still said he’d always look out for her. It’s a shame because now that he thinks about it they’d be really cute together.

“What who?” Richie’s eyes widened, eyes looking even bigger because of his glasses.   
“It’s not for me to say”   
“Oh come on! I don’t like them together, you don’t like them together so maybe...we could find a way to split them? And then you can set her up with the other guy?” Suggested Richie, a little mischievous smirk at the last part. He couldn’t do that to Bella, if she’s happy then he needs to accept that she’s happy, she’s had a thing for Eddie for as long as he has known her and now she’s finally with him so maybe he should just accept it.

“I....I can’t do that”  
“-why not?! Like you said they just don’t match!” Responded Richie as he looked back at them.  
“But they’re happy though right?” He said as they both looked back at the table, watching as Eddie leaned forward and kissed Bella’s cheek, the smile on her face as he did.  
“We can’t do that to them, maybe we just need to accept that they’re happy” Said Marcus as he watched what looked almost like heartbreak on Richie’s face as he looked at the couple.

He sighed “you’re right, if Ed’s is happy then I need to be happy” he muttered, Marcus sadly smiled back at him.   
He could be wrong but maybe Marcus is right about Richie.

.......

When he found out Bella was leaving Derry he debated if to climb into one of her suitcases and go with her. He’s rather spend he rest of his life with Bells than rot here in Derry, especially after everything that happened...that night. 

He almost cried as he watched Bella pass her suitcase to her dad to put in the car. He watched as she said her goodbyes to Eddie before making her way over to him “gonna miss me Mucus?” She asked with a smirk.  
“Of course Bells” he said as he pulled her into a hug.  
“We’ll always be best friends” he whispered in her ear before she pulled away. Bella gave him a sad smile and he could see the tears beginning to form in her eyes “I’ll miss you” she whispered, okay now Marcus was pretty sure he was tearing up. 

She gave a sad smile before making her way to the car to climb in. He made his way over to Eddie who looked close to tearing up too, poor guy had basically been dumped by his first girlfriend. He sighed before he slung his arm over Eddie’s shoulders. 

When the car was about to drive away he noticed Bella in the window look in a different direction as she waved at someone. He turned to look to see Ethan Davis standing far away, waving to her. Marcus felt his heart go heavy at the sight...she should have been with Ethan.

It was not long after when Marcus’ mom had gotten a job offer out of Derry so it meant they were packing their bags and leaving too and Marcus couldn’t be more relieved. He hated this place and he couldn’t wait to start fresh. 

The only problem was while everyone else forgot about what happened that summer, in a way Marcus did not forget like everyone else. He was haunted at night by vicious, terrifying nightmares that felt more like memories. They continued on into his twenties and he would wake up crying because they haunted him, he was so terrified and confused because he felt like he had lived that moment but he couldn’t remember, he tried to remember god he tried but nothing. His body was painted with scars that made him cry because he couldn’t remember how he got them, he couldn’t remember why he had so many scars.

He did the only thing he could do to try and forget or even help him ignore the nightmares for a while...he turned to the bottle.


	5. 27 Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 27 years later the group have grown up and now they are all being pulled back to Derry.

27 Years Later

“I don’t want to have to warn you again Mrs Flowers but you need to take your medication to avoid your symptoms flaring up, I’m sure you’d rather not be back here” Said Bella as she removed her surgical gloves and collected her things together.  
“I told her it was best she took them but did she listen? no!” Exclaimed Mr Flowers  
“Oh Shut up Harold” she argued back as Bella watched the elderly couple argue, it was amusing to watch. She seems to get elderly patients on a daily basis with their partners and she often wonders if that will ever be her? Will she find someone to love and grow old with?

“My husband is a pain in my ass” said Mrs Flowers causing Bella to raise her eyebrows with surprise and her husband to scoff and shake his head. Seems she’s all love there.

“What about you dear? You have a husband?” She asked which took her by surprise, no she was very much single, some reason she struggled to hold down relationships with guys. In a way she always felt like they just weren’t right for her and she’d end up breaking it off...she hopes the right one is out there somewhere.  
“Who me? Oh no! no I’m very much single” she responded as the elderly woman nodded her head.  
“Ah something tells me you’ll be meeting Mr right very soon” she said with a smirk as she shuffled back to her comfort in the bed.  
“She says that to every single woman-“  
“-oh shut up Harold I’m always right about these things!” She snapped back.

“I’m telling you dear, any day now!” She said as she pointed at her causing Bella to chuckle.  
“Well I appreciate you thinking about me Mrs Flowers, I’ll keep that in mind” she said as she walked over to the end of the bed to fill out her information on the clipboard before slipping it back into the pouch attached to the bed.

“I have to go and see some other patients but if you need anything do not hesitate to call me or another nurse over” she said softly before Harold gave her a nod as she opened the curtain to leave before closing it again.

She felt exhausted, working at the hospital really brings it out of her. It’s a job she absolutely loves, she’s always liked the idea of helping others even if you do come across some assholes or difficult people in the line of work. 

As it got towards the end of her shift she headed to the staff room. It was empty she began to collect her things in the staff room, it was empty as others had left or no one was on break yet.

The tv was on as she got her things together, but something on the small tv in the corner caught her eye. As she continued to watch on the screen there was something about a brutal attack in Derry, two men found dead it was described as an animalistic attack. Something about it made her continue to stare at the screen, her eyes felt locked and she couldn’t look away. She could feel her heart pounding and suddenly she felt like her hands were trembling.

Once she moved her eyes away from the tv screen the place began to cross her mind. Derry? why does that place sound so familiar to her? She quickly grabbed her things and signed out before leaving the hospital and rushing to make her way to her car. 

As she climbed in she sat there for a while, hands were still trembling as they gripped the stirring wheel. She couldn’t explain it but something was telling her to go to Derry. She closed her eyes to give herself time to breathe and think and the second she did she saw a flash of something, like an imagine, it was too quick to see but it was like a flash of Red and orange...like it was something or someone standing there. She gasped as she opened her eyes again, jumping back a little in her seat. She didn’t know why but she needed to go to Derry.

She drove to the radio station as she promised she’d give her little sister a visit at her work, Molly has been wanting to show Bella the studio for a while but she was always caught up in work all the time. She still had time before her show ends for the night and they close up.

She arrived at the radio station, identifying who she was to security before they let her up to where her sister was currently wrapping up the show. The building was big and modern so Bella must admit she’s jealous that her sister is working in such a fancy looking place, no wonder she’s been wanted to show her around as she clearly wants to show off.

“Well that’s all for tonight, thank you to all the lovely people who listened in! I’m Molly Morgan and you’ve been listening to Molly’s hour, goodnight!” She exclaimed before pressing the button for the music and removing her headphones. Bella watched Molly’s eyes light up as she caught sight of her on the other side, quickly rushing out the room to greet her sister.

“You’re here!” She exclaimed as she pulled Bella into a tight hug, almost wheezing at the the feel of her sister’s tight arms wrapped around her “um yeah I had some time” she almost wheezed before Molly pulled away.  
“So I thought I’d pay a little visit” she finished before giving her sister a smile.  
“So? What do you think?” Said Molly with a smirk as she leaned against one of the tables behind her, crossing her arms.  
“Very nice place” said Bella as she looked around.

“That’s all you have to say? Oh come on please tell me you’re jealous! I need to hear my big sister is jealous that I’m working in a big ass fancy studio!” She said as she got up, hands clapped together as she walked over to Bella.  
Bella rolled her eyes “Okay Molly I’m so jealous! I’m so jealous of your fancy building and your fancy studio” exaggerates Bella as Molly grinned at her. 

“Oh yeah guess who just cancelled on me?! Fucking Richie Tozier! He called this morning saying he’s gotta he somewhere and can’t make the interview! Like I’m so pissed! I thought I was finally gonna meet THE Richie Tozier!” Ranted Molly as she threw her hands up in the air. Bella sighed as she placed both of her hands on each of her sister’s shoulders “look I’m sure he’ll reschedule when he can” she said as Molly sighed “he better” she muttered.

Derry came up in her mind again, this weird feeling telling her to go there and still she couldn’t think of the reason why. “What’s wrong” said Molly as she noticed a strange look in Bella’s eyes.  
“Hey listen um....I’m going away for a few days” she started as she moved her hands off her sister’s shoulders.  
“Since when?”  
“It’s kind of a last minute thing” she explained as Molly narrowed her eyebrows together.  
“Where you going?”  
“Derry?”  
“What the fuck is in Derry?”  
“I just have to go”  
“Is it a guy?”  
“What?!”  
“Is there a guy in Derry?”  
“What no!” She said as Molly shrugged her shoulders.  
“Yeah seems about right, you can’t seem to keep a guy” she responded causing Bella’s eyes to widen, wow little uncalled for Molly Morgan.  
“I’m just saying! They never last very long but anyway never mind that! Why are you going to Derry?!” She said as she waved her hand a little to bring it back to the subject. 

“I just...I just have to go” Molly started to look concerned, something wasn’t right, why was she going to Derry? And whatever reason her sister was looking uneasy, she began to feel frustrated as she wasn’t getting an answer.  
“Why won’t you tell me why you’re going to Derry?...what are you hiding Bella?” If Bella was honest she couldn’t give Molly an answer even if she wanted to because the truth is she didn’t know herself. 

She looked at Molly with an apologetic look “I just have to go, it will only be a few days and then I’ll be back” she said before she pulled her sister in for a hug “I’ll see you in a few days” she said before pressing a quick kiss to her sister’s cheek and leaving.

Molly felt really uneasy as she watched her sister leave. She was hiding something, she didn’t know what but whatever it was it didn’t sound good and it left her with a really sickly, uneasy feeling in her stomach. She continued to look at where her sister was standing before, her hand now reaching for the phone in her pocket.

As she pulled it out her thumb hesitantly hovered over the keypad, debating if to dial for a cab. Something about Bella was not sitting right with her and she needed to find out what it was, she dialled the number before bringing the phone to her ear.  
“Hello? Could I have a cab take me to Derry please?” 

................

It was a bit of a dull day today, Ethan thought as he watched his class on the playground through the classroom window.

Ethan stayed in the classroom most lunch breaks, in a way he feels out of place in the staff room. He watches as all the other teachers talk and make plans with each other while Ethan is left out of them, like the brush him off like he doesn’t exist, the worst feeling about it was that he had gotten used to it. All his childhood seems like a blur but he feels like he had been feeling like this all his life...lonely and just a shadow.

Being in the classroom gives him time to catch up on marking work or even silently drawing some things in his notebook. He would draw random things, at the moment he had been drawing colourful flowers on his most recent page. It’s always been his little thing to draw, although he can’t really remember his childhood he was pretty sure that he has always drawn, it was just his little thing. He had hold of a blue pencil, gently gliding it across the paper as he added more detail to the petals of the flower.

As he was scribbling down on the paper his classroom door opened. There stood two girls from his class, Abi and Daisy. Abi stood at the door, crying and sniffling with her knees scraped while Daisy held onto her to give Abi support.  
“Oh no Abi what’s happened!” Exclaimed Ethan softly, turning around to face them as they both came over to his desk.  
“She fell over Mr Ethan” said Daisy as Abi began to rub her eyes from the tears.  
“Oh sweetheart, come and sit in Mr Ethan’s big chair and I’ll get the first aid box” he said as he got out the chair and Daisy helped Abi to climb up onto it. It was always an honour to sit in Mr Ethan’s big chair, the children always liked the big chair.

Daisy stayed at Abi’s side, rubbing her shoulder as Ethan grabbed the first aid box from the back of the classroom. As he came back over he opened up the box and put on some rubber gloves before kneeling in front of her to take a look at the scrapes on her knees.  
“Does she need surgery Mr Ethan?” Asked Daisy causing Abi’s eyes to go wide.  
“Nah! She’ll be just fine, won’t you Abi?” He said before giving Abi a soft smile as she nodded her head.

He reached for the antiseptic wipes before taking it out the packet. “This might sting a little” he said before he gently cleaned her knees up.  
“Daisy could you pass me the bin sweetheart?” He asked, continuing to clean her knees as Daisy brought the bin over so that he could throw the now dirty wipes in.  
“Okay that’s the hard part done! Does your mommy or daddy put band aids on you?” He Asked as he looked up at her, Abi nodded in response as he looked in the box to see what he had.  
“Okay there’s two choices! I have hello kitty or Spiderman, which one?” He asked as Abi had a little think about what she wanted.

“Um...could I have a Spiderman one on this knee and a hello kitty one on the other knee?” She asked as Ethan chuckled.  
“Okay, one of each it is” He said as he reached to grab for the band aids.  
Sitting at Mr Ethan’s table, Abi was able to get a look at his drawings “you’ve been drawing again Mr Ethan?” Asked Abi as Daisy moved to get a closer look at his notebook.  
“So pretty!” Exclaimed Daisy as she looked at the flowers on the paper. The children always loved Ethan’s drawings, sometimes they would ask if he could draw them a picture, that always goes down well.

Ethan smiled as he stood back up and grabbed his notebook, ripping the page out of the book before splitting the paper in half so there was a flower on each side seeing as he drew more than one on the paper. The girls had a look of excitement on their faces as he gave both girls a drawing. “Since you’ve been so brave Abi and you’ve been a good friend helping her out Daisy” he said before giving them a wink and the girls smiled, holding the drawings as they looked at them. 

That’s when the bell went for end of lunch and Abi climbed off the big chair to go over to her own and Daisy followed. One by one all the children came into the classroom as Ethan greeted them all with smiles.  
“Good afternoon everyone!”  
“Good Afternoon Mr Ethan!” The children called out in response once the class had finally sat down at their desks.  
“Did you all have a good lunch!”  
“Yeah!” They all said while nodding their heads.  
“Good!” Exclaimed Ethan before the opened the classroom closest and began to get the supplies “now this afternoon we’re going to be doing my favourite subject, Art!” 

He had let the children get on with their art to themselves as Ethan sketched in his own book. He didn’t think about what he was drawing he just let his mind take over. He used Red’s and oranges as he sketched on the paper but as he stopped to look at what he drew he felt like his guts were in his mouth. He drew a clown...an awfully familiar clown, it had bright orange hair and a big toothy grin while holding a red balloon and something about it made him feel a cold shiver down him. He felt a sweat building up as he continued to look at the drawing right in front of him before he closed the book, he didn’t want to look at it. Maybe it was best he spent the rest of the lesson walking around the classroom to view the children’s art. 

Ethan lay in bed awake that night as he continued to think about the clown he drew, something wasn’t sitting right with him and he couldn’t explain it. He just felt like something was wrong and everything felt strange. 

He lay awake most nights if he was honest, thinking about how he wishes his life was like, don’t get him wrong he loves his job but he just feels so...lonely. No one looks his way and something tells him he doesn’t want them too anyway because for twenty seven years he feels like he’s been missing someone, missing someone he loved but he doesn’t know who.

He jumped a little as he heard his phone ring, knocking him out of his thoughts. He sat up in bed to see it was a withheld number as he looked at the caller ID.  
“Hello?”  
“Hello is this Ethan Davis?”  
“Um yes speaking”  
“Hello this is Paul from the Derry retirement home, we’re calling about your father Steven Davis, you’re the only family member we could get hold of” his father? He doesn’t remember much about his father but he was pretty sure that they did not have a good relationship.  
“Sorry um, what about my father?”  
“Mr Davis we’re very sorry to tell you but your father is very sick...seems like it will be any day now and he’s requested to see you” he explained over the phone, his father was dying? He still couldn’t get his head around the situation.  
“Right um...thank you for letting me know”  
“Looking forward to seeing you Ethan, I’ve missed you” just as Ethan was about to question what the hell he meant the phone line went dead. That was weird...he missed him? He’s never met this man before? Has he? Something about it “I’ve missed you” sounded really dark and sinister and it was making him feel uneasy.

..........

“Hate to break it to ya but your wife’s cheating” said Seb as he threw the pictures on the desk for his client. He watched as his client grabbed the pictures, looking through them of his wife in various positions with another man. He watched as the client clenched his fist around the pictures before he huffed.

“Sorry but now you know” Muttered Seb as he spun a little in his chair.  
“Fuck you!” Spat the man.  
“Woah I didn’t sleep with your wife what are you saying fuck you to me for?” He responded as he held his hands up in surrender.  
“Because this is all a big joke to you isn’t it? I’ve basically lost my wife and now you want money!”

“Listen! I couldn’t give a shit who you, your wife or Jerry next door was fucking! I’m just doing my job, you asked me to investigate your wife, I did and that’s what I found so you can have your little bitch fit but don’t take it out on me!” Exclaimed Seb which seemed to anger the guy more. He grabbed his phone as he noticed the clients fist tightening, why can’t people accept that their wife is cheating and go and confront them instead of getting aggressive with him? 

“Better watch your anger pal or I’ll dial some special little numbers that bring the police here or I’ll get Jerry from next door I’m telling ya, you don’t want to mess with that guy” he said with a shit eating smirk as he held his phone in his hands. The client looked at the phone before back at him as Seb raised his eyebrows.

The client huffed before taking money out of his pocket and throwing it on the desk “don’t you want the pictures? They’re no use to me, I mean....not gonna lie they both look pretty hot” he admits he just said that to piss off the guy, but he wasn’t wrong about the people in the pictures. The man huffed again before he left the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

He sighed as he threw himself back into the chair, that was a tough one. Why do people feel the need to try and shoot the messenger that they’ve literally paid for to deliver the message? He shuffled the papers and shoved them into a messy pile on the desk before he sat in silence. 

He’s so good at finding out shit about others but he can’t find out shit about himself apparently. His whole childhood feels like this empty hole, he can’t remember anything but he feels it...he feels this pain that he could only describe as grief but he can’t understand why. He always feels this anxious feeling inside himself and for some fucking reason he hates Red balloons, he doesn’t want to be near one of those fuckers and he couldn’t explain why.

Speaking of red balloons, fucking Jerry from next door was knocking on his door while holding one of those fuckers.  
“Oh woah, woah, woah you’re not coming in here with that thing!” Called out Seb as Jerry opened his door.  
“But it came with the letter for you-“  
“-I don’t give a fuck! Get that fucking thing out of here!” He called out, pointing at the door as Jerry opened his own door to shove the balloon in while shaking his head.  
“Fucking red balloons” he muttered to himself as Jerry entered the apartment now balloon-less.

Jerry threw the letter onto the table before sitting down as Seb picked up the letter.  
“So who was the guy that just left your apartment? Boyfriend?” Asked Jerry causing Seb to laugh.  
“Oh definitely not, too rough for my taste...nah I exposed his wife, she was cheating on him and he just couldn’t take the heat” he explained as he began to open the letter.  
“Maybe it’s because you behave like such a little shit to your clients” said Jerry.  
“Okay dad!” Responded Seb as he rolled his eyes and began to read the letter.

It was a handwritten letter about someone in Derry who was interested in hiring him for a job.  
“Apparently someone in Derry wants to hire me” he said as Jerry raised his eyebrows “how much are they paying?” He Asked.  
“He’s not said...but a job is a job, hopefully I’ll get big bucks for this one” he muttered as he read over the letter.  
“Some guy named Vic Criss apparently” why did that name sound so familiar? Whoever it was, was now leaving an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

“Well I’ll leave you too it, if you find out anything interesting let me know” Said Jerry as he got up out the seat and went to leave, Jerry always loved a good gossip and Seb was his best source.  
“Will do Jer!”  
“Don’t call me that!” He snapped back as he left.

Seb threw the letter on the desk as he tried to remember. Vic Criss...Vic Criss....why did it sound so familiar to him? Well there was only one way to find out, he’s going to Derry.

.......

Hands clawing at him, the sharp sting of them dragging at his skin. The warm feeling of blood dripping down his body from the claws digging in. The darkness overtaking the room as he feels like he’s being pulled down. He tries to scream and cry out for help but no one listens, he even cries out for his mom but the shadow mimics him which makes him sob harder.

That’s when something went to jump and grab at him, he only saw it for a flicker of a second, before he threw himself forward. Marcus panted and gasped for air as he looked at his surroundings...he was in his room. He gasped and groaned as he placed his hands over his face and feeling the wetness of his cheeks. The same fucking dream for twenty seven years.

He wiped his eyes as he took a deep breath, god he could use a drink. He can’t....fifteen years he’s been sober for, he can’t break that now, maybe his other distraction will help. He looked over at his acoustic guitar in the corner of the bedroom as he looked at the nightlight plugged in next to it. The nightlight was a yellow crescent moon with white clouds below it, something about it meant a lot to him but he couldn’t remember what. Something about it kept him safe and made him feel like home even if he couldn’t explain the reason for it. He smiled at it, whatever the reason was for the nightlight he hopes it’s a happy memory. 

He climbed out of bed and with trembling hands grabbed for his guitar before sitting back on the bed. He breathed in before slowly breathing out and setting his fingers in place. He began to softly strum along on his guitar, strumming anything that came to mind as he tried to calm himself down. For twenty seven years he has suffered with these nightmares, these visions. They frustrate and anger him because they feel so real, almost like he has lived in it and he tries so hard to remover what it is. He turned to music as a distraction, he’s gotten around and is known in some places for his music, he’s not hugely famous but he has some sort of fame to his name. 

Marcus spent some time strumming his guitar and softly singing to himself, the urge to drink was now gone but the sickening, uneasy feeling was still there. He stopped what he was doing on the guitar and turned on the small radio at his bedside, maybe listening to the radio would help distract him.

“News just in two bodies have been found in what could only be described as an animalistic attack. Their bodies were found up washed up in Derry near the carnival taken place tonight” Marcus began to zone out of the rest of the news report as all these thoughts began to flood through his head. Why was Derry so familiar to him? And why did the place start to bring him amplified fear and dread? 

He pushed his guitar aside as he headed to the bathroom to splash his face with cold water. It didn’t help the feeling of dread inside him. As he closed his eyes again to splash more cold water on his face there he saw it...a clown, it was a clown. In that split second the hand of the clown went to reach out and grab him. He was sure he felt the hand for a split second, touch his arm and the sight and feel of it caused him to snap his eyes open and throw himself back away from the mirror, his back slamming into the wall. He clutched his bathroom door as he gasped and panted. Something happened to him in Derry, he doesn’t know what but something happened. He’s been living it for twenty seven years and he’s never going to find out the truth unless he goes there.

He headed back into his bedroom, grabbing a bag and began to pack some things together. He can’t continue to live like this, he needs to find out the truth, fill in the blank spaces of his life.


	6. Chapter Six - Welcome Back Pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bella and Ethan return to Derry.  
Possible trigger warning - Ethan’s part contains themes of emotional abuse/neglect

As Bella entered Derry she felt this sudden feeling of sickness wash over her. It was all too familiar for her and now she knew. She drove slowly as she scanned her surroundings feeling all of these memories start to come back to her, she grew up here, she grew up in Derry. How could she forget where she grew up? And why was it all suddenly coming back to her?

She recognised the old buildings and the odd atmosphere it always had. she remembers the school she went to and the movie theatre. The movie theatre.......as she slowly pulled up next to it she felt this sudden rush of sickness, fear and anxiety fill her. She remembers being dragged out of a closet in the movie theatre and she was screaming and crying but she couldn’t remember why, she just remembers feeling so scared. 

She also remembers how whoever grabbed her made her feel safe and protected but she couldn’t remember faces or names she just remembers him saying that she was okay and that he was here. She still couldn’t picture the face but she remembers being forced to look into a pair of brown eyes, something about his eyes were so comforting to her the moment she looked into them. 

The big black hole of her childhood always frustrated her and it’s still frustrating her now that she was struggling so hard to try and remember. It was coming back to her in small bits but she still felt very much in the dark about her childhood. She sat in her car as she looked at the movie theatre, something was telling her to go in but something else was giving her this really uneasy feeling. Her thumbs tapped the stirring wheel as she debated on what to do. 

She turned the engine off and climbed out of her car, it felt weird to have her feet on Derry ground after all of these years. In a way the whole situation felt odd and unnatural but at the same time she felt like she was back at home, it was strange. Slowly she made her way towards the movie theatre before opening the doors to go in. She remembers she used to go with someone but she can’t remember their name or their face but something about them she could feel had a closeness in her heart. 

She looked around at the familiar surroundings of the movie theatre, a place she remembers going too many times to count and the amount of candy she’d eat with whoever this person was. She has happy memories here, apart from that one incident but she knows she’s had good times at this movie theatre even if she can’t remember.

“Bella” whispered a voice causing this sudden sickness to fill her entire body. The whisper sent chills down her body and she knew it was something evil approaching her. She slowly turned to look at the door at the end of the movie theatre....she remembers that door, a balloon, a red balloon she remembers following.

“Welcome home Bella” the voice now whispered causing her to swallow the lump in her throat. She felt like something was compelling her to go to that door even if her mind was screaming at her to just turn around and walk away.

She slowly made her way to the door, a dark chuckle on the other side as she held her hand out towards the door handle. She slowly turned the door knob before opening the door to darkness. When she says darkness it was towards the end of the room, like a shadow of something. Something was there waiting for her.

She remembered....she remembers the clown, the door becoming so far away no matter how fast she ran, the walls closing in and god where they closing in. She remembers not being able to breathe because she was panicking so much and the walls felt like they were suffocating her as they closed in. She remembers the ball she curled herself up in and the pretty pink dress she wore. Bella felt sick.

“It’s been twenty seven years Bella” said the voice, it’s eyes glowing in the darkness at the end of the room. It was the clown, it’s gotta be the clown that scared her all those years. She remembers the orange hair and the bucked teeth, she remembers it’s glowing eyes.  
“Why don’t you come in” suggested the clown.  
“Go fuck yourself” hissed Bella, the words gritting through her teeth causing the clown to chuckle.   
She was terrified but she was angry too, the way that thing made her feel so scared all those years ago and now it’s back, it’s back trying to make her feel scared again. Is this why she’s back here? Did the clown find a way to draw her back to Derry? To finish what it had started all those years ago? 

“Better watch out for baby Morgan” it said causing Bella’s heart to stop and eyes to widen.  
“What do you mean? What the fuck do you mean?!” She yelled, it was coming after Molly? No it can’t? She’s back at home while the clown is here in Derry.   
“Talk to me you piece of shit what do you mean?!”

That’s when the clown emerged from the shadows, razor sharp teeth as it ran towards the door. It ran like it was about to rip to shreds and Bella was terrified. In a panic Bella screamed out as she slammed the door shut just as it was about to grab for her. She ran as fast as she could out of the movie theatre as she looked at her surroundings to see if the clown had followed her out.

She gasped for air as her wary eyes looked around, she probably got some funny looks in the movie theatre if anyone was around but she didn’t give a shit. She stood there for a while, feeling her heart pounding and the sound of it beating in her ears.

As she felt herself beginning to calm down and she was sure the clown as gone she looked around at her surrounding. There was some sort of parade going on and there were people holding balloons....red balloons, fuck balloons. 

As she looked at the commotion, she watched as she noticed someone covering their eyes as they made their way through the parade, speed walking as fast as they could alway from the crowd while wary looking at the balloons. The man stood there, next to Bella as he looked back.

“Not a fan of balloons either?” Asked Bella as she turned to look at him.  
“Definitely not, especially red ones, fuck red balloons” he said in response as he pointed at the balloons. That was before the guy turned to look at Bella, looking her up and down “sorry I hope I don’t sound rude but you look a little pale, you okay?” He asked.  
“Um yeah...I just....I just had a really bad trip down memory lane” she said before her eyes quickly looked back at the movie theatre before looking back at him.

She noticed how to guy looked at her, his eyes narrowing a little. If she was honest she thought he looked familiar, like she had seen his face before. She raised her eyebrows a little as the guy continued to stare “I’m sorry but you look really familiar...what’s your name?” He apologised as he realised he was staring for too long.  
“Um Bella...Bella Morgan” his eyes widened a little “oh my god! We never spoke but we were in some of the same classes together in school, I’m Sebastian...Sebastian Miller” he responded a little nervously. Ah so that’s why he looked familiar! Sebastian was in some of her classes, she remembers he used to hang out with the fucking Bowers gang....and someone else after that...but she couldn’t remember who.

“I remember you, I think it was math we were in? Sorry I’ve only come back here today and all these memories are coming back” explained Bella as Sebastian’s eyes widened a little.  
“Me too! Does it feel like...like your whole childhood was this emptiness....like you forgot everything?” He asked her, she could sense how uneasy he sounded, she thought there was something wrong with her but others were feeling like this too? What if the clown had dragged Sebastian here too, to come for him?  
“Yeah it’s weird, being back here feels like the memories are coming back faster and faster and it feels a little overpowering...strange” she responded as she looked back at him, the look in his eyes she knew he was feeling the exact same way.

“Um...maybe we could catch up? There’s a pretty empty coffee shop down there if you wanna grab a coffee” suggested Sebastian as he pointed towards the building.  
Bella looked back at the movie theatre before she sighed “you know what? I could do with a coffee...or something stronger after the shit I’ve just been through” 

.................

The moment Ethan entered Derry it was like everything became too much, all these memories he didn’t know he had flashing all at once in his mind. He grew up here, he grew up in Derry, he’s starting to remember it all and he remembered how miserable he was.

The taxi had pulled up outside the retirement home and Ethan had felt this lump in his throat. He was starting to remember things, he was starting to remember his dad and how cold he was towards him. He remembers how all his life his dad treated him like he didn’t exist and how lonely and heartbreaking it made him feel. He was feeling that pain all over again and now he had mixed emotions, he was feeling the pain of neglect all those years ago mixed with anger from him but also possibly a hint of happiness that he actually wants to see him. He shouldn’t get his hopes up, something tells him he’ll be leaving with that heartbreak all over again that he’s been used to feeling all his life.

He thanked the taxi driver and payed him before he stepped out the cab and stood outside the retirement home. He clenched his fist tightly as he felt anxious, taking a deep breath before unclenching as he exhaled. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he made his way to the entrance of the home.

Making his way to the desk to greet the person it was a man who looked around his age. If he was honest he felt like he had met him before, as he looked up at Ethan he felt like his eyes looked too familiar and he couldn’t put his finger on it. “Your father is this way Ethan” said the guy behind the desk as he moved away to guide Ethan to his father’s room.

Ethan paused as he looked at the guy “h-how did you know who I was?” Asked Ethan because he was now getting really creepy vibes.  
“Oh it’s just we’re not expecting any other guests today, I’m Paul the guy you spoke to last night” explained Paul as he held his hand out for Ethan to shake.  
“Pleased to meet you” he responded as he accepted the handshake but it didn’t get rid of the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach, maybe it was because he was about to see his father after all these years.

As they let go, Paul led him towards the room and Ethan felt like his heart was beginning to pound as he got closer to the door. “I’ll leave you to it” said Paul before walking away. Ethan’s hand trembled as he reached for the door handle before slowly opening the door.

The first thing he saw was his father now old and looking worn out in bed, an IV attached to his hand as Ethan stepped in. “Hello?” Groaned his father as he looked up, Ethan stood by the door, keeping his distance.  
“Hello Steven” he said as he looked at him, he remembers his last moments with his father. He remembers telling him that he was done and that he’d never see him again, look how that turned out.

Steven narrowed his eyes together as he got a better look at him “Ethan?” He questioned and Ethan felt his own pulse skip.  
“E-Ethan?...come closer, let me look at you” he said as he weakly held his hand out for Ethan. Ethan hesitantly stepped closer but didn’t accept his hand. He still felt angry and upset with his father after all these years, he felt like he should be the better person but years of emotional pain and just wanting his dad to notice him he couldn’t push that pain away.

“You’ve grown into such a handsome man” he said as Ethan scoffed.   
“You gonna cut to the chase?” Started Ethan as he crossed his arms and Steven looked at him confused.  
“You didn’t give a shit about me my whole life so what’s changed? Why am I here?” He said as Steven swallowed.

“I’m dying Ethan...I just wanted to know how my son was doing” something about this angered Ethan, like all this bottled rage he was holding onto was now being released and it was turning ugly. Was his father’s guilty conscience finally catching up with him? “I’m doing great” he started as he leaned forward, face closer to his father and clutched the bars on his bed.

“I have a good home, a great job...like I told you all those years ago, I’ve made something of myself when you didn’t give a shit while you...” He said as he looked his father up and down “spent your life rotting here” a smirk formed on Ethan’s face.  
“Ethan don’t be like that”   
“Like what? Cold? Mean? Bitter? Distant? Because that’s what you where, you where all those things growing up....look how the tables of turned” he almost spat, his words feeling like venom as they rolled off his tongue, tears were prickling his eyes and threatening to leave as his hands clenched on the bed handle, knuckles turning white at how hard he was clenching. 

As Steven looked up at him with no words Ethan scoffed “got nothing to say?” That’s when the look in Steven’s eyes changed, something about the look in his eyes made his blood run cold.  
“I was going to say don’t be so pathetic” spat his dad before grabbing Ethan’s wrist.  
“You were too much of a coward to tell me all those things when I was alive” he continued as Ethan furrowed his eyebrows together with confusion, what was he talking about.

He hand on Ethan’s wrist grew incredibly cold “can you feel it? I’ve been dead for two years boy” he said as Ethan felt panic rise in him. He tried to move back but his dad had a tight grip on his wrist.  
His dad rose from to bed, following Ethan who was now panicking and trying to pull away. The IV drip now dragging up his dad’s hand and up his arm, the needle dragging at his skin which was enough to make Ethan want to gag.

“You’ve always been such a pathetic little boy and you still are” hissed his father as his face grew closer to Ethan’s. His eyes were now looking rotted and Ethan felt a whimper in his throat as he panicked, this is not real, this is a nightmare.

In a panic he finally broke away, this was not real? He ran to the door but his “dad” followed him, his cold now rotting body was now pressed against him as Ethan tried to grab for the door handle “YOU’RE NOT REAL! YOU’RE NOT REAL!” He yelled out in fear as he turned to face the rotted corpse of his father. He had never felt so terrified in his whole life, he had never heard his own voice sound so scared or has he felt this fear before?

“You won’t get far Ethan! You’ll die a nobody here!” Chuckled his father as Ethan’s hand grabbed for the door handle and he threw himself out the room, slamming the door behind him. He panted and whimpered, hands on the door to stop whatever that was on the other side from following him as he tried to collect himself before going to confront Paul on what the fuck that was.

As he got to the main entrance he noticed how awfully abandoned it was. Looking he saw Paul sitting back in a chair, looking ahead at the fire place. “I’ve missed you Ethan, how long has it been? Twenty seven years?” He asked and Ethan felt like his body was trembling. 

Paul smirked “what? Don’t recognise me?” He said as he turned to look at Ethan, that’s when he flashed a toothy grin, his front teeth now looking bucked causing Ethan’s words to feel trapped in his throat. The clown...he remembers...the clown that summer. He remembers running away terrified all of those years as it tried to come for him, all the insults it said him his father’s voice. The clown set up a trap and he fell for it, it’s brought him back to Derry to kill him, finish off what he tried to do all of those years ago.

‘Paul’ laughed as he leaned back in the chair “well now it’s time to float Ethan” It said as Ethan gasped. “No!” He called out as he ran to the door, opening it and running as fast as he could out of the retirement home. 

He kept looking at the retirement home as he ran out the door and because he wasn’t looking where he was going he ended up slamming into someone. “Ow fuck!” She groaned, Ethan looked to see he had slammed into a blonde girl, younger than him now getting up off the floor.

“I-I’m really sorry” stuttered Ethan as he helped her up, now feeling guilt for hurdling into this random girl.  
“Yeah you should be...Hey you okay?” Her tone quickly changed as she most likely noticed how uneasy he probably looked and looked back at the retirement home, his heart was still pounding in his chest. “Um yeah just....stay away from there” he muttered as he pointed at the retirement home. The girl raised her eyebrow before giving a little nod “okaaayy” she said slowly as she looked at the retirement home.

“I mean some old people are pretty scary I don’t blame you” she joked as she looked back.  
“Actually while I’m speaking to something maybe you could help me? I’m looking for my sister, she’s probably around your age, a little smaller than you, brown hair and a pretty sharp jawline” she explained as Ethan raised his eyebrows with amusement.

“I can’t say I have, I’ve only just arrived here” he responded.  
“Same, maybe if I give you her name it could help? her names Isabella but she prefers Bella, Bella Morgan?”  
Bella Morgan,  
Bella Morgan,  
The name started coming back to him, her big brown eyes, her soft hair, the freckles across her nose, her sweet smile. Bella Morgan, that’s why he felt this feeling all those years...this feeling of love, the love he felt for Bella Morgan, god how could he forget her? But now she was here? Here in Derry? 

“Sorry did you say Bella Morgan?”  
“Yeah that’s my sister, you know her?” She asked as Ethan softly smiled.  
“I’ve known her since we were kids, once she moved out of Derry I never saw her again...sorry this is just a lot to take in right now um, wow, she’s here?!” He was probably doing a terrible job at keeping his excitement in but he couldn’t believe it! Bella Morgan was in Derry after all of these years! How could he forget her?! How could he forget the girl he’d do anything for?

“Yeah I kind of followed her down here, maybe if you’re not busy you could help me? I guess this could be some sort of reunion” she suggested.  
“Yeah I’ll help you look...sorry I didn’t catch your name?”   
“Molly” she said as she held her hand out for him to shake.  
“Ethan” he said as he took her hand.  
“Nice to meet you” She said as they pulled away from the handshake and began to walk.  
Now why was Molly Morgan familiar? Wait a minute...

“Are you Molly Morgan on the radio?”  
“Yep that’s me! Want a picture?”


	7. Chapter Seven - Welcome Back Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group now reunite and talk

When Seb entered Derry all of these memories started to come back to him. He grew up here, and he remembers he had a friend...Ethan? Ethan...something? He couldn’t remember his last name but he remembers it’s Ethan. A lot of it was still of a blur but he remembers the only friend he had, he remembers how sweet and kind he was and how he accepted him for his sexuality...he was the reason he’s so comfortable with who he is now. 

Arriving in Derry felt a little overwhelming and daunting especially when the first thing he sees is a parade going on filled with fucking balloons, red ones to be precise. He still wonders why Red balloons give him so much anxiety...is it something to do with this place? He was already feeling this worry and dread and he couldn’t even explain why. 

He tried to make his way trough the crowd at the parade which was a little bit of a challenge, especially while trying to avoid eye contact at those fucking balloons or even being near them. It took a bit of time as he tried to politely get past people before he was finally out of the big crowd of people. He stood back as he stared at the crowd of people, feeling relief to get out of it.

“Not a fan of balloons either?” Asked a woman next to him as she turned to look in his direction.  
“Definitely not, especially red ones, fuck red balloons” he said in response as he pointed at the balloons. Turing to look at the women next to him he noticed how sickly and pale she looked, almost like she had seen a ghost.

“sorry I hope I don’t sound rude but you look a little pale, you okay?” He asked.  
“Um yeah...I just....I just had a really bad trip down memory lane” she said before her eyes quickly looked at the movie theatre they where currently standing next to before she turned to look back at him. Now that Seb really looks at her, he noticed how familiar she looked, like he had seen her before but he couldn’t put his finger on who she was.

“I’m sorry but you look really familiar...what’s your name?” He apologised as he realised he was staring for too long and probably creeping her out.  
“Um Bella...Bella Morgan” the moment he heard the name leave her lips he remembered. She was in his class right? They never spoke from what he could remember, so why does the name stand out so much? As the memories slowly came back to him that’s when he remembered...Ethan, god that boy was head other heels for her, always looking at her like she was an angel sent from the heavens above, in a way how love sick he was for her made him want to throw up.

His eyes widened a little “oh my god! We never spoke but we were in some of the same classes together in school, I’m Sebastian...Sebastian Miller” he responded a little nervously and a smile came to Bella’s face.   
“I remember you, I think it was math we were in? Sorry I’ve only come back here today and all these memories are coming back” explained Bella as Sebastian’s eyes widened a little. She had just arrived here too? Bit of a strange coincidence that they have both arrived in Derry?

“Me too! Does it feel like...like your whole childhood was this emptiness....like you forgot everything?” He asked her.  
“Yeah it’s weird, being back here feels like the memories are coming back faster and faster and it feels a little overpowering...strange” she responded as she looked back at him. She knew exactly how he was feeling. 

“Um...maybe we could catch up? There’s a pretty empty coffee shop down there if you wanna grab a coffee” suggested Sebastian as he pointed towards the building.  
Bella looked back at the movie theatre before she sighed “you know what? I could do with a coffee...or something stronger after the shit I’ve just been through”.

.........

Like he said, it was pretty quiet when they entered the coffee shop, basically abandoned. Maybe because of the excitement of the parade that everyone was out there instead of sitting indoors. Bella and Seb both sat at a table at the back of the coffee shop, ordering their drinks as they looked through the window.

“Feels strange being back right?” Started Bella as she kept her eyes on the window.  
“Yeah it almost feels weird....like this place is separated from the rest of the world” Responded Seb as his eyes joined the window.  
Bella nervously swallowed “it’s like....I completely forgot about my childhood...all I remember is feeling scared...” she muttered and Seb began to feel it too, this fear but he can’t remember why he was feeling so scared back then and it was causing him to feel uneasy now.

“Anyway! Never mind this place what have you been up to?” Asked Bella as she quickly changed the subject, turning back to look at Seb.  
“Oh I’ve um...I’ve got my own business, I’m a PI” Explained Seb as his fingers tapped the mug in his hands.  
“Oh that’s cool! So what? You do undercover stuff?” She asked with a smirk as she took a sip of her drink.  
“I guess” shrugged Seb “mainly exposing cheaters, my last client didn’t take the news very well. It’s actually why I’m here! I received a letter from someone asking for my help” explained Seb and Bella’s eyes widened a little.  
“Are you sure?”   
Seb furrowed his eyebrows together “what do you mean?” He questioned.  
“It’s just...don’t you find it strange that we’re back here? To me it felt like I was drawn here...what if were not the only ones back?” Said Bella as her hands almost clutched her cup, almost like she was trying to stop them from shaking. 

“Is there something you’re not telling me? Because when I saw you, you look really pale and kept looking back at the movie theatre...did something happen?” He asked as Bella looked up at him again, her brown eyes almost widened at his question.  
“It’s....it’s hard to explain...I just remember last time I told someone about this they didn’t believe me...” she started, she remembers telling someone about the theatre incident and them laughing at her thinking it was a joke....like anyone would with something like this.

“Bella” started Seb as he leaned forward and placed his hand over her shaking ones.  
“I don’t remember much at the moment but I remember feeling terrified about something but I can’t remember what...maybe whatever it is you saw was the same thing?” Bella’s wide eyes looked up at him as she nervously swallowed “I s-“

Next minute Bella’s phone was ringing, as she looked at the caller ID she saw it was her sister.  
“Sorry...I’ve gotta take this” she said as she moved her hands away and answered the phone.  
“Finally you answer! This place is a bitch to get signal!” Exclaimed Molly the second Bella answered the phone.  
“W-where are you?”  
“Okay don’t be mad...but I kind of followed you...I’m in Derry” Bella felt like her heart stopped the second she heard those words.  
‘Baby Morgan is next’ echoed through her head and she started to panic.  
“No no no no no you can’t be here!” She said as her voice rose with panic.  
“Well I’m here now, Bella what’s going on? you’re scaring me” she said, her voice sounding concerned.  
“Where are you?”   
“There’s some sort of parade going on” she explained and Bella could hear all the commotion on Molly’s side of the phone.  
“Are you near a cafe?”   
“Yeah, oh I see you!” She said before she hung up the phone.

Bella put her phone down and buried her face with her hands.  
“You okay?” Asked Seb  
“My sister is here, she can’t be here, she’s in danger” Muttered Bella with panic in her voice.  
“What do you mean? Is this to do with what you saw?” 

That’s when the dell rang as someone came through the door. Molly quickly came walking over to the back of the room towards Bella “you going to tell me what’s going on? Or do you still not have an answer” she said, she had a look of anger and annoyance on her face as she looked at her sister.  
“It’s hard to explain, I couldn’t tell you back at home because I didn’t know why I had to be back here but not I’m started to remember things, Molly you can’t be here!”

Seb got up out of his seat as he gave the sisters space to argue with each other and that’s when he noticed someone by the door a guy. They both looked at each other as they scanned each other’s face. Suddenly it started to become clear as to why his face looked so familiar...Ethan?

“Ethan?”  
“Seb?” They both asked as their eyes widened and smiles began to form in their faces. His childhood friend...well his only friend but his best friend. Suddenly they were walking faster up to each other before they welcomed each other in a tight embrace “oh my god” breathed Seb as he clutched onto Ethan tightly. His best friend was here, oh my god his best friend.

As they pulled away they really looked at each others faces. Still the same faces but now older “holy shit Ethan?!”  
“It’s been a while right?” He said with a smile before Seb pulled him into another hug.   
“I can’t believe I couldn’t remember you...but the second I saw you I-“ muttered Ethan as they pulled away again.

“You forgot too?” Asked Seb as Ethan gave a sad smile.  
“I’m so sorry” as Seb shook his head.  
“It’s okay...oh speaking of...do you remember a certain someone?because look who I bumped into” Asked Seb with raised eyebrows as he turned towards the direction of the girls arguing with each other. 

Bella? Oh wow....she’s even more beautiful than Ethan remembers. Her face older but aged so gracefully, her big brown eyes and her long lashes, her long brown hair. Ethan felt like he couldn’t speak, his heart was pounding in his chest and all these feelings he felt for her all those years ago were now coming back but now it felt like these feelings were amplified, it almost made him feel weak and sick. God he never had just a crush on her did he? He was in love with her...still is.

“Look we need to all sit down and talk about whatever this is because you’re not talking a lot of sense...I also came in with someone, he says he knows you?” Sighed Molly as Bella looked confused.  
“Who?”  
“He said his name is Ethan?” Ethan? Ethan? As she looked over her eyes locked with those familiar brown eyes from all those years ago, the eyes of the boy who told her that she is safe and that he’ll protect her all those years ago. Ethan was the boy at the movie theatre “Ethan” she breathed.

Ethan watched as her mouth formed ‘Ethan’ too quiet for him to hear but he knows she said his name. She remembers him? She actually remembers him? Even though he was always that boy in the shadows? He nervously swallowed as Seb stepped aside as Bella walked over to him.

As she got closer to him he was able to get a better look at her face, her soft, big brown eyes that looked like honey in the sunlight, the adorable small freckles across her nose, her pink cheeks and her soft smile. “H-hi” whispered Ethan with a soft smile.  
“Hey” She Responded softly as she pulled him into a hug. Her soft hair, smelling like honey as it brushed a little across his face and the sweet smell of her perfume as he wrapped his arms around her smaller frame. He could stay in this moment forever if he could, her being in his arms like he always wanted, like he wanted all of those years ago but he can’t. 

But he was brought back to reality as Bella began to pull away from the hug. “It’s really nice to see you”  
Ethan said, somehow able to find the courage to be the first one to speak.  
“It’s really nice to see you too” she said with the most cutest smile he had ever seen, the way her eyes lit up as she smiled even if it was only a soft smile. 

.......

Marcus’ hands clutched the stirring wheel as he now entered Derry. Could this be his answer? Could this be the answers to all of his problems? Could this place be the reason why he has been haunted with nightmares and visions for twenty seven years? 

His breath felt shakey as the slowly drove through Derry. It had suddenly felt like all of these memories he had forgotten where slowly coming back to him. Derry was where he grew up, something must have happened to him in Derry...something must have happened here to make him such a fuck up.

He recognised the school he drove past and the movie theatre...Bella...Bells, his best friend. He began to remember Bells, they’d do everything together ‘Bells and Mucus’ was their team name. Remembering his best friend almost took away this fear and anxiety he was currently feeling right now, the thought of his best friend, she always made him feel safe.

He ended up driving up to a coffee shop, he needed a minute, he needed time to stop and process all the stuff that was slowly coming back to him. How did he forget it all? How did he forget his whole fucking childhood? That can’t be fucking normal? “Fuck I need a drink” he muttered to himself...maybe he should get a coffee, probably not the best for calming nerves but he needed something. 

He climbed out of his car before making his way in. He went over to the counter as he waited for the waitress behind the counter to come over. He ordered a normal coffee as she began to get to work. That’s when he noticed a girl walk up to him, obviously waiting to get a drink. He knows it’s rude to stare but he couldn’t help it, she looked so familiar. Those eyes, the face....

The girl seemed to be annoyed as she turned to look at him “Can I help you?” She said, her tone a little harsh. That’s when it clicked...he knew exactly why she looked so familiar.  
“Bells?” He muttered and her eyes widened at the nickname before she began to closely look at him.  
“I’m sorry?” She asked.  
“Do you remember me? Mucus?” He said as he pointed at himself hoping she remembered him and that this was Bells otherwise he just embarrassingly called himself Mucus in front of a stranger, although it seems she did as her eyes widened a little more “Marcus?” She breathed and a smile formed on his face.

“Oh my god” she whispered as she pulled him into a hug, an awfully tight hug. Marcus felt like he could cry, his best friend was here, she was here in Derry too. “It’s been so long!” He exclaimed as Bella laughed before pulling away.  
“Oh my god Marcus! After all of these years?!” She exclaimed. If she was honest he’s not how she expected him to look, Marcus was always a posh looking kid even though he didn’t behave it, with his slick back hair and stylish clothes and now he looks...casual, his hair was a little volumed and fluffed and he had a beard, he was pretty she must admit and she imagines he’s probably a hit with the girls.

“W-what are you doing here?” She asked and that’s when an uneasy look was on his face.  
“If I’m honest...I-I don’t know...it just felt like something brought me here, you?” He responded. Oh my god...what if the clown had brought them all here to finish what it had started back in that summer?

“I think you better sit down” she muttered as Marcus looked over at the table with three other people circling around it.  
“W-what’s going on?” He stuttered  
“The two guys at the table are Ethan Davis and Sebastian Miller...they were brought here too” she explained as Marcus looked over.  
“Who’s the girl?”  
“That’s...that’s my sister, she kind of followed me here” that’s when Marcus’ eyes lit up as he looked over at Molly.  
“You have a little sister?! Now I’ve gotta meet her” He exclaimed as he walked over to the table to join the others, Bella following behind.

“You guys remember Marcus?” Asked Bella as they sat down.  
“Ah yes, nice to see you again” Said Ethan as he brought his hand out for Marcus to shake.  
“You too Ethan” he said in response as he took his hand.

.......  
They all talked for a while, forgetting the main subject as to why they were gathered around in the first place as they all began to remember things about their childhood in Derry and Molly learning new things about Bella’s friends.

“I fucking knew you’d become a doctor or nurse or some shit like that, the amount of times you’d clean me up after falling off my bike” chuckled Marcus as he took a sip of his coffee.  
“So she’s always been like this?” Smirked Molly   
“Yes! The moment I hurt myself and cried like a bitch, out came Bells’ backpack with her bandaids and tissues” he said as Ethan smiled a little to himself. He remembered the time outside the store when Bella came running over to him to clean his knee...after he ran away from the clown. He remembers the adorable look of concentration on her face as she cleaned it up before putting a band aid on.

“I remember” started Ethan as they all turned to look at him “I just remember one time I fell and Bella found me outside the store and helped to clean my knee up” he explained with a little smile as he looked up at her. He saw the smile on Bella’s face as he talked about it, he’s guessing she remembers too “you were a great patient, didn’t whine or complain, not like Mucus over here” she said with a smirk as she playfully reached over to shove Marcus.

“Hey! It hurt I had every right to complain” he whined before rubbing his shoulder.  
“Anyway so what has quiet little Ethan Davis been doing in his life” exclaimed Seb as he finally spoke up.  
“Well I’m actually a elementary school teacher” he explained as his finger circled his cup.  
“Oh wow! It makes sense you where always incredibly kind and sweet from what I remembered, I bet the kids love you” Responded Seb because it was the truth, anyone could see back then how sweet Ethan was...well the people that actually took time to get to know Ethan.

“Yeah...I guess, I mean the kids always come in with smile on their faces and they seem to like my drawings” he explained as a smile formed on Bella’s face.  
“You draw?” She asked with surprise.  
“Y-Yeah for as long as I can remember...I guess it’s just a little hobby of mine” he explained as a wider smile formed on her face.  
“Do you think you could draw me a picture?” She asked with a little smirk which actually took Ethan by surprise causing Molly and Marcus to look at each other, was Bella flirting? Is this the guy Bella came to Derry for? 

Ethan smirked back and leaned forward a little “what would you like me to draw?” He said with confidence but Seb could clearly see the pink on his cheeks, Ethan was flirting with his crush and that boy couldn’t control the flustered look on his face. Marcus and Molly looked at each other with a smirk before looking back at the kind of flirty interaction between the two.

“Anything” She said with a smile, her pearly white teeth showing and her eyes almost lighting up with excitement which almost made Ethan’s heart do flips.   
“Well I’ll be sure to think of something for you” he said with a soft smile.  
“I look forward to it” 

As Marcus began to think the interaction almost caused some sort of memory trigger. He remembers the drawing he found under the tree of Bella, the red notebook. He also remembers Ethan in the bathroom crying in one of the cubicles after he found out she was dating Eddie Kaspbrak. It’s so obvious...the drawing was Ethan, in a way his heart felt for him..this boy was in love with her all those years ago and it seems the feelings never disappeared. 

“Anyway so what does this one you call Mucus do?” Said Molly as she put a pause on the flirty interaction between this guy and her sister as she pointed at Marcus.  
“Well blonde Morgan! I do music” he responded as he ruffled her hair a little causing her to scoff and fix it.  
“Oh wow really? Not a career I thought you’d end up in” Exclaimed Bella.  
“Yeah...it’s not something I thought I’d end up doing either if I’m honest...it just creeped up on me” he explained.  
“Wait a minute..what’s your full name?” Asked Molly as she looked deep in thought as if she was trying to remember something.  
“Marcus Hayes” he said as her eyes lit up.  
“Oh my god I love your music! You’re kind of like a little underground discovery of mine, I’ve actually played some of your stuff on my show!” She exclaimed, now probably sounding not as casual as she was before as her inner fangirl was coming out, almost excited as the time she almost had an interview with Richie Tozier.   
“You’re the radio host? Molly Morgan? Don’t know why it didn’t click before, well thanks to you I had a lot of new fans come my way” he said with a smile as Molly smirked.  
“Well you’re welcome” she said as she saluted before she grabbed her coffee cup.

“Now what about you Seb, what do you do?” Asked Ethan.  
“Well as I was telling Bella before you decided to enter my life again, I’m actually a PI” he explained as Ethan raised his eyebrows.  
“So come on then, what cases have you solved?” He said with a playful smirk as he leaned forward.  
“Well a lot of people that like to fuck others that are not their partners, I’ve built up quite a saucy collection of photos” he smirked causing Ethan to scoff and roll his eyes.  
“You dirty...” he muttered with a smirk.  
“Oh come on Ethan don’t act like you wouldn’t be into it” he teased.  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about” Ethan chuckled while his cheeks went a little pink also earning a little giggle from Bella at Ethan’s flustered face. 

“Come on! latest case Sebby boy, lets hear it!” Exclaimed Marcus, tapping the table a little.  
“Same thing really...some guy suspected his wife, wife was doing the dirty, guy didn’t take it very well. I basically had to threaten him with Jerry from next door” he explained.  
“Jerry from next door?” Asked Ethan.  
“Yeah big muscly guy from next door, he’s really nice, you’d probably like him” shrugged Seb before taking a sip from his coffee. 

It went quiet again as Molly looked around at the others “look...it’s nice that you’ve all met each other again and I’ve gotten to know you all but...you going to explain what’s going on?” Started Molly as she looked back at her sister.

Bella swallowed as her hands almost clenched her coffee cup.  
“We were all brought back here for a reason right?” She started as she looked at them all.  
“I saw on the news about a couple found dead here...they described it as an animalistic attack, something told me I had to come back...almost like I was drawn here” she explained.  
“I heard the same thing on the radio” joined in Marcus  
“I got a letter about a client...there was a red balloon attached to the letter” nervously swallowed Seb.  
“I got a call from the resident home about my dad” muttered Ethan as he let out a shakey breath, remembering what happened about an hour ago.

Bella swallowed as she looked around at the group.  
“Something has brought us all here...I saw it at the movie theatre all those years ago and I saw it now, it’s coming for us and I...I don’t know what I’m supposed to do” she explained and all eyes at the table widened.  
“What do you mean coming for us? What’s coming for us?” Asked Seb as panic started to fill his voice. Ethan was quiet, trying to clutch his own trembling hands, did she see what he saw back there? Did she see the clown?

“Bells? I’m still not remembering much so I need you to help me out here” Said Marcus with worry too, he needed answers. Something back here in Derry made him so scared that he struggled hard in life, Bella must know something, he remembers that him and Bella made an oath to protect each other. What was the oath for? Was it for whatever Bella had saw?

“Bells?” He said again as she looked at them all with fear in her eyes. “I saw....I saw...a c-clown” she said and it all started to come back to them all.  
“I’m sorry what?” Spoke up Molly, incredibly confused as she looked at the panicked reactions of them all. 

Seb remembers running through Derry screaming out for help but everyone looked at him like he was crazy, zombie hands...zombie hands grabbed at him. He remembers the feel of the peeling flesh against his skin as they grabbed for him, the red balloons...the clown had a red balloon...oh my god it all makes sense. 

It started coming back to Marcus too...that night, the way he cried and sobbed for his mom as he was basically pinned down and tortured by the clown. He pulled tighter on his sleeves as he felt his heart pounding in his chest, he remembers its face as it was getting ready to devour him. His whole life was a living hell because of it and he didn’t even know. His knee bounced a little and his fists clenched. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, what clown Bella?”   
Bella’s eyes snapped back at Molly  
“You call a cab and get the fuck out of here” she said, her voice almost sounding harsh but Molly could see the fear in her eyes.  
“No! None of this is making sense! I’m not leaving until you explain! Bella!” She barked back before Bella quickly stood up causing the others to jump a little.  
“I’m sorry I can’t do this” she muttered before quickly leaving the table and the cafe.

Ethan was the one to quickly get up and follow her out the shop. As Marcus looked back he remembers what he heard Ethan say all those years ago about how he’d always protect Bella. Seb knew it too, Ethan was still deeply in love with that girl and that still hasn’t changed, those feelings all those years ago are still there. Seb wonders if Ethan has been lonely all those years...like he was waiting for her. 

Marcus looked through the window as Ethan caught up to Bella and grabbed her shoulders to face him. He could see the soft look on his face like he was trying to calm her down, almost like he remembered that night at the movie theatre as he watched him comfort a screaming Bella. That comforting look was still there, even now. Eddie was a nice kid an all but...it should have been Ethan. Moving his eyes away from the window he placed his hand on Molly’s shoulder to try and calm her. 

“I think I remember everything...do you?” Started Seb as he looked back away from the window to Marcus and Molly.  
“Y-Yeah...I think so too...we’ll explain it to you” Responded Marcus as his hand gently squeezed Molly’s shoulder.

......

“Hey Bella!” Called out Ethan as he followed her out but she continued to walk, her feet speeding up a little.  
He caught up with her, turning to face her as he grabbed both of her shoulders to stop her from moving.  
“Hey, Hey it’s okay” he whispered with reassurance as he looked into her eyes.

“I can’t do this Ethan, you probably think I’m crazy but-“  
“-I don’t, I know exactly what you’re talking about because an hour ago I was attacked by it” He said causing her eyes to widen. He was attacked just then too?   
“Look this is terrifying and obviously it’s brought us all back but...why don’t we talk, just me and you if you want, we’ll just go somewhere and talk yeah?” He suggested as Bella looked up at him. 

Those soft eyes of his, making her feel safe all those years ago and she was feeling it again. “Just me and you” he whispered.  
Bella nervously swallowed as she nodded her head.  
“Okay” she whispered as Ethan gave her a soft smile.  
“Okay” he whispered back as he moved his hands from her shoulders and went to turn around to find somewhere to talk.

What Ethan wasn’t expecting was for Bella’s hand to reach for his. He looked back at her, giving a soft smile before he took her smaller, delicate hand in his and they started walking.


	8. Chapter Eight - Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bella and Ethan talk while Seb, Molly and Marcus run.

Bella and Ethan ended up at the kissing bridge while on their walk, a place that was incredibly familiar to everyone in Derry, Ethan remembers one time considering carving a certain thing on it but he never did. They both leaned against the fragile looking boards as they looked out at the lake, it was surprisingly peaceful given the circumstances.  
“What happened in the movie theatre?....all those years ago?” Asked Ethan as he turned to look at her. He watched as she nervously swallowed, hands clenching a little tighter on the board.

She exhaled before she quickly turned to look at him, his eyes always so soft and comforting. She turned back away to look out at the lake and woods “it started off with a balloon, a red one....it was floating across the movie screen during the movie and I-I don’t know I just...I just felt like I was being drawn to it” she started as Ethan kept silent, listening to every word she had to say because even then as a kid he wondered what happened back there, once he experienced his attack he wondered if it was linked with what happened to Bella.

“That’s how I ended up in that closest, I followed the balloon into there like the stupid kid I was...that’s when I saw it, the clown and something inside me was just screaming to run. As I did the door started to get further and further away and the walls started to close in and I felt like I couldn’t breathe so I just curled up in a ball and waited for my end...that was until you pulled me out” she explained before turning back to look at Ethan. He remembers her terrified screams as he ran to the door to pull her out, he remembers her clutching onto him as she cried her eyes out, in that moment he wanting nothing more to protect her from all dangers of the world so that she could never feel that scared again.  
“If it wasn’t for you I think I would have joined all the other missing children” she muttered as she kept her eyes on him.

“I remember Seb telling me about the clown...he said it felt like it was feeding off his fear” he explained causing Bella to scoff.  
“Explains the walls closing in” she said.  
“You said it came for you? The moment you came back?....has it come for you before?” She asked as Ethan nervously swallowed.

“Do you remember the strange, creepy looking house towards the back of Derry? That’s where it found me...I remember that summer standing in front of that house with my drawing book...suddenly all these words were appearing on the blank paper...insults freak, coward, loser, failure” he muttered, voice getting quieter as he listed the insults, Bella’s eyebrows furrowed together as she listened the the horrible words...is this how Ethan saw himself?

“Next thing I know there’s this clown in front of me and I just ran and I’m hearing my father’s voice in my head calling me a failure and a coward....last night I got a phone call telling me he was dying and that he wanted to see me” he continued and Bella noticed how his eyes started to glass over with tears.

“You see, my whole life he never cared about me...I was just a shadow, so when I came here I just...I didn’t know how to feel, in a way I felt happy? Because he wanted to see me, acknowledge my existence you know? But at the same time I just felt this anger...so I told him how he made me feel all those years ago...turns out he’s been dead for two years and it was the clown, continuing to tell me what a failure and a coward I am and that I’ll die alone” he explained before it grew silent again. The clown feeds off fears...this was Ethan’s fear? That everyone, especially his father sees him this way? It made Bella’s heart sink at that thought of Ethan feeling this way about himself.

“Those things it said...is that how you see yourself?” She whispered as Ethan sadly chuckled, hands clenching the board of the kissing bridge as he looked out at the lake.  
“Do you want the honest answer? Because the truth is....yeah” he confessed as this sadness began to fill Bella at the thought of Ethan feeling like this.  
“All my life I’ve been a shadow, even now...no one saw me then and no one sees me now”  
“I saw you” Said Bella before Ethan scoffed and shook his head.  
“No you didn’t...no one did” in a way it took Bella by surprise the sudden harshness from Ethan.  
“Because the truth is Bella no one cared about me back then and they still don’t, no one gave me a second thought about me and I bet you didn’t either” he spat before he closed his eyes, cringing at the harshness of his words, he shouldn’t let his emotions get to him.

“I’m sorry” he muttered, as he opened his eyes, Bella had shuffled closer to him before turning to face him “you’re wrong, don’t assume my feelings about you because you don’t know!” she snapped a little before she sighed.

“I’m sorry that it took me so long to see you, but the truth is after what happened at the movie theatre all I thought about was you!” She started.  
“Even when I came back here even though everything was still a blur I just remember someone pulling me out of the movie theatre and I felt safe. I remembered those brown eyes I’m looking at right now” she said with a soft smile as she tapped one his eyelids causing a sad chuckle to leave him.  
“So don’t assume that I didn’t see you or think about you because I did” Ethan didn’t know what to say, in a way he felt like the clown was probably playing tricks on him again.

“Do you...do you remember what I said all those years ago? Outside the store?” He asked causing a little smile of appear on Bella’s face.  
“That’s you’d protect me if I needed protecting?” She said with a smirk. She remembers it very clearly now, putting the pieces together he must have hurt his knee running from IT but when he said that he’d always protect her she just felt this warmth inside her, she couldn’t explain it. All those years ago Ethan made her feel a certain way, similar but different to how Eddie made her feel but she couldn’t explain it...she still can’t.

“I still stand by it...maybe we were brought back here to kill it before it kills us, stop it from coming after others you know? It’s tried to come after us twice but I promise you....I won’t let anything happen to you” He said as he placed his hand over hers. His hand big and warm compared to hers, she softly smiled as she placed her other hand on top of his, her thumb stroking across the back of his hand causing his heart to feel like it was fluttering. 

“We should head back, find the others” suggested Bella.  
“Y-yeah we should”

..........

“So this clown has been tormenting children? Feeding from them?”  
“You must think we’re crazy right?” Said Marcus.  
“Maybe if it was just one of you saying it but all of you panicked the second she mentioned a clown” Responded Molly.  
“Oh god” she muttered as she leaned forward, rubbing her hands over her face “and I’ve brought myself to this creepy ass town”

“Well, welcome to Derry!” Said Seb sarcastically as he finished the last of his coffee.  
“So does it turn up just as the clown or?”  
“It feeds off fear, seems it shapeshifts or torments us on our biggest fears before eventually from what I’m guessing, eats you” Explained Seb  
“Mine is zombies”  
“Mines the dark...what about you?” Asked Marcus and Molly felt like her heart was in her throat...they can’t know what she’s truly afraid of, they can’t know what she’s hiding.  
“I don’t know, I don’t think I have a main fear” she lied as her hands clenched her mug a little.

Seb took his phone out as he checked the time “Look it’s been nice meeting you guys but I’m supposed to be speaking to a client so I have to go” he said as he collected his things together.  
“Hey are you sure it’s a client? What if it’s the clown?” Asked Marcus causing Seb to pause in his tracks.  
“It has crossed my mind...like I’ll just be careful, I’ll be okay” he said before he made his way out the coffee shop.

It was quiet between the remaining two as they looked at the door “you don’t think it’s a client do you?” She said as she turned to look at Marcus.  
“Nope” that’s when Molly got up from her seat, collecting her things together “where you going?”  
“To follow him! We can’t let him go alone!”  
He watched as Molly got up, he was honestly terrified because he didn’t want to face this thing again but at the same time he can’t let blonde Morgan go out alone because Bells would kill him.

“Goddamn it” he muttered as he grabbed his things and followed behind. 

.......  
Seb has ended up wondering the streets as his client had left him a little clueless about where to find him to talk. It did make him feel on edge, the worry that it could be the clown here and using the whole client thing as bait.

The parade was still going on, if the clown was around it wouldn’t attack in front of all these people right? Fuck this place, fuck Derry, was this job even worth it? He was walking around for a while before he ended up in Neibolt street. That’s when his phone rang, as he looked at the caller ID he saw it was an unknown number, his client? 

He hesitantly answered the phone before putting it up to his ear “hello?”  
“Hey is this Seb, it’s Vic!” Said the voice that sounded so familiar...Vic? Cousin Vic?  
“Cousin Vic?” He asked  
“Hey it’s been a while” he chuckled  
“Yeah no shit it’s been a while, fuck! Where are you?” Asked Seb as he continued to walk down the street.  
“You’re nearly there” He Responded causing Seb to pause in his steps, as he looked forward he saw the house, the dark creepy ass house from all those years ago that everyone would talk about. He noticed how awfully nice Vic sounded on the phone, he was never this nice with him as kids. As a kid Vic found Seb incredibly annoying and hated the fact that Seb had to tag along with him, he remembers that time Seb stepped in the defend Stanley Uris from the Bowers gang and the look of disappointment on his cousin’s face.

“What’s the matter Seb?” Spoke a dark chuckle on the other side of the phone.  
“I thought you missed me? Don’t you want to float with me?” He Asked as suddenly he felt a cold hand grab his ankle. He couldn’t scream, he couldn’t speak as he looked down. Emerging now from the ground, Seb could be sick at the sight and now the hard hitting realisation of his past. Out came a rotting corpse of Vic, still grabbing onto his ankle, his throat was slit and he was covered in dirt and smelt like rotten flesh, the smell was almost enough to make him want to heave. Vic was murdered...Henry Bowers killed him...he remembers now and now he was back as his worst nightmare.

As Seb tried to get away, whimpering in fear he fell back, the decaying hand still clawing at him, holding tight into his ankle. Seb finally yelled out, kicking his leg to try and shake Vic’s decaying hand off him, feeling the peeling skin drag against his leg, crying out in fear and the crushing feeling of grief now for Vic.

“I’m so sorry!” He cried out as he kicked the rotted corpse of Vic causing it to push back and let go of Seb’s ankle. He scrambled onto his feet as he began to run as fast as he could. He was having serious deja vu as he ran down the streets yelling out for help and again everyone looking at him like he’s crazy.

As he ran he in a way felt relief as he saw both Marcus and Molly coming his way “IT’s here, IT’s fucking here, run!” He yelled out causing them both to go wide eyed and run as fast as they could, they didn’t know where they were going but they just needed to get away. But as they ran they ended up splitting off from each other.

Molly ended up in the direction of the parade while Marcus and Seb split off somewhere else. She tried to make her way through the crowd as it suddenly felt too overwhelming, people crushing up against her. She felt like the place was now spinning as she began to hear voices from the people in the parade speaking. She couldn’t make out what they were saying at first but the longer she stayed in the crowd the louder the chant started to grow, growing louder and louder.

_“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
Molly felt a whimper in her throat as she began to panic, people know? How do they know? She doesn’t know these people._

“You shouldn’t have come here Molly” chuckled a dark voice as the chanting suddenly grew quiet and it felt like time had froze. The chanting had stopped and everyone froze, turning to look at Molly. She panicked as she looked around everyone crowded around her, staring at her as if she was disgusting.

“Because now everyone knows your secret, you’re dirty little secret” as she looked ahead, her eyes went wide with fear and panic as she saw it, the clown. It’s bright orange hair and toothy grin while holding a red balloon, just like how Marcus and Seb had described it.  
“You’re not the only one here with a dirty little secret” it grinned as Molly shuffled back, bumping into people standing around her.

She panicked as she tried to get away, pushing her way through the crowd and the chanting began again.

_“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
Along side that she could hear the sound of the clown’s laugh causing her to whine in fear as she shoved her way through the crowd of people looking at her in disgust and shame. _

As she broke from the crowd she continued to run as fast as she could. She didn’t look back as she ran, she didn’t even have a plan of where she was going she just ran.  
She was terrified and now felt this sudden pain of humiliation and disgust with herself on top of the fear. Even though she was now far away from the crowd it didn’t stop the memories of the chant in her head. 

As she continued running there she saw Bella and Ethan, she screamed out as Bella turned to look, eyes wide with panic before both of them were now running towards her.  
“Molly?” She called out as Molly ran into her arms, forcefully shoving her a little at the impact.  
“I-I saw it! I saw the fucking clown! It knows who I am!” She explained, voice speaking fast with panic and fear as the two crowded around her.  
“Hey you’re okay now, we’re here” Said Ethan with reassurance as he put his hand on her shoulder. 

That’s when Seb came running over “thank god I found you guys, I saw IT, it tried to come after me” explained Seb as he leaned forward, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.  
“I saw it too” Muttered Molly in response  
“Oh shit” 

As Bella looked at the group that’s when he noticed that there was still no sign of Marcus. Worry began to fill her at the memories of that night all those years ago and how vulnerable he was back then, what if IT was coming after him next?  
“Where’s Marcus?”

.......

Marcus had ended up running into a random building, he doesn’t know why, it just seemed like a place in his mind to go. He didn’t think all he knew was he needed to get to some sort of safety away from the fucker, he couldn’t bare to experience what he did all those years ago again. What he learned was that entering that building was a big mistake.

What he had ran into was some abandoned building and the next minute the door was being slammed shut and all lights were out. Marcus now in complete darkness started to panic, he felt sick and suddenly the terror from all those years ago was coming back to him. His hand touched walls in search of some sort of light switch or an exit because he felt the desperate need to get out. 

“Miss me Marcus?” Called out a voice, an all too familiar voice, a voice that haunted his dreams most nights. He felt a whimper trapped in his throat as his heart now pounding in his chest, he’s not going to escape this time, there was no way he was going to escape.  
“Gonna cry for mommy again” it teased as Marcus swallowed, shaking his head without realising, his whole body was trembling. He could cry but he wasn’t going to let that thing get a bigger kick out of this.

That’s when he noticed the glowing eyes in the darkness, those familiar, terrifying eyes from all those years ago that still haunt him to this day. He began to shuffle backwards, trying to back away from the eyes that seemed to be getting closer and closer to him. Emerging in the darkness Marcus could see the clown now huge, glowing eyes and razor sharp teeth, crawling towards him, loud stomps filling the room.

Marcus whimpered and panicked, backing himself into a corner of the room as the only sound to be heard was the sound of growls and his own panicked cries. His trembling hands covered his face as he cried out in fear as he saw the huge hand, reaching out to grab at him. This was it, this was the end, his nightmares were bait and he took it...now the nightmares were back into his reality and this time it really was going to be the death of him, not the alcohol...not that incident...the actual nightmare was going to kill him.

Suddenly a brightness filled the room and multiple hands were dragging him. It felt like that night all over again, where all the hands pulled at him in the darkness.

Marcus yelled out as he tried to break free from the hands, he needed them off, he needed to get away “Marcus! Hey Marcus! You’re safe now you’re okay!” Called a familiar voice, as he opened his eyes he saw it was Bella and Ethan holding him while Seb and Molly also stood around, seems the group all found each other while running away from the Clown. Safe? He wasn’t safe? IT was coming for him and he knew there was no escaping it this time.

“Safe?! You think I’m fucking safe?!” He snapped back, tears forming in his eyes as he looked at Bella “this thing has ruined my life and now it’s going to be the death of me! It’s gone for now but it will be back!” He spat as he shoved the hands off him. His car was still outside the coffee shop, he can’t stay here, he needs to get out of Derry. 

He got up on his feet as he looked at everyone with tears in his eyes, he felt so weak and pathetic...like he did all those years ago. “I...I can’t do this” he whimpered as he shoved himself past the group and made his way to his car.

The group watched as Marcus walked away, making his way to the coffee shop. Bella looked at Marcus and back at the group “I’ll talk to him, there’s a hotel not far from here, everyone head there and I’ll catch up” she said before she rushed over to try and talk to Marcus. Something tells her that there is a lot he’s hiding from her.


	9. Chapter Nine - Marcus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter focuses on Marcus’ past fifteen years ago.   
Warning - Chapter contains some sexual themes (but nothing graphic) alcohol use and death.

Bella arrived at the coffee shop car park just in time to open Marcus’ passenger door and climb into his car before he could drive anywhere. Marcus stopped what he was doing as he turned to look at her, he doesn’t know why he’s surprised because Bells has always been stubborn, he should have known she wouldn’t have grown out of the stubbornness.  
“Get out the car Bells”  
“Not until you talk to me”   
“What is there to say? It’s back and it’s coming back for me I-“  
“Marcus we’re all here together, and we need to stop it-“  
“I CANT!” Yelled Marcus causing Bella to jump a little at his outburst. She watched as Marcus look at her apologetically before his head rested on the stirring wheel and he began to sob. 

Bella swallowed, feeling a lump in her throat at how pained and terrified Marcus was. Her hand reached out to gently rub his back in an attempt to comfort him “y-y-you see...” Started Marcus as he lifted his head back up, tears were still coming down but he tried his hardest to speak.  
“You all forgot about Derry..in-in a way I didn’t because it haunted me most nights for twenty seven years...I-I am waking up from these nightmares that feel so real, always feeling like memories...but now I know they are, I’d cry because I’ve got scars all over my body that I didn’t know how I got, no memory of them I just have them” he explained as Bella’s eyebrows furrowed together, scars? IT only tried to pull him under the bed right?

“Scars?” She said as Marcus’ trembling hands clutched the stirring wheel “Marcus?” She warned as he let out a shakey breath.  
“There was a lot I didn’t tell you about that night because I didn’t want to scare you...and I felt like I deserved it for not believing you, it felt like a punishment....you see the clown didn’t just try to drag me under the bed...I had multiple sharp hands hold me down and torture me, scratching down my body and arms and digging their claws in, it hurt so bad and I cried and begged for my mom but she never came, the clown lay above me and laughed and made fun of me before it dug it’s claws into me too....I thought I was going to die that night, Somehow, god, somehow I was able to break free from the hands grabbing me and I dragged myself across the floor crying for my mom while the Clown grabbed at my ankles, I was able to make it to my bedroom door and open it and that’s when it disappeared....I was covered in blood but I changed my clothes before you came because I didn’t want to scare you” he explained. Bella felt sick, Marcus went through absolute hell and kept it to himself for all those years all because he felt like he deserved it and because he didn’t want to scare her? Her eyes were tearing up as she looked at him.

She watched as his hands left the stirring wheel and slowly pulled up his sleeves to reveal the long, deep red scars on his arms, it looked like claws had scratched him. Tears were now falling down her face as she looked at the scars “I-is there anymore?” She whimpered before Marcus’ reached to the bottom of his shirt, slowly pulling it up to reveal more deep red scars on his body. A choked gasp left Bella as she put her hand over her mouth and sobs began to leave her. It did this to her best friend, tortured and terrified him and continued to haunt him for all these years.

Marcus looked up at her again as he let go of his shirt, choking on his own sobs before Bella quickly reached for him and pulled him to her. Wrapping her arms around him as he began to sob again, feeling the comfort Bella gave him that night all those years ago only this time now she knows the truth of what really happened. 

They stayed like that for a while, even when the tears had stopped from them both, only the sounds of their sniffles to be heard in the car. They both could fall asleep like this if they wanted to, they would have as kids but it felt too dangerous given the circumstances of what was currently going on in Derry.   
“The nightmares got too much for me...and I started drinking, in the end I ended up alone and losing someone I really care about”   
...........

15 years earlier

It was the same every night, Marcus would sit at the bar alone with a drink in his hand, minding his own business as he drank his sorrows away. He’s been feeling like the nightmares and visions have been getting worse and he just wanted to ignore them...he just wanted to forget. He had woken up from another bad dream and decided he’ll head to the bar to forget about it all.  
“Can I get you anything else?” Asked the woman behind the bar. Marcus must admit she’s very pretty, she had brown hair and had a styled scruffy look to it, it matched the alternative look she had going on.   
“Just the same, please” muttered Marcus as he pushed the glass towards her.

“Gotcha” she said with a wink and a smile as she turned back around to fill his glass again. Marcus had seen her a few times working here when he’s come to drink, she’s always got this confidence about her and this fire and most likely way out of his league. She passed the glass over as Marcus offered a quiet thanks before she went back to work.

Marcus was just feeling the warm buzz of the alcohol but not enough to actually feel drunk as of yet, people around him on the other hand was another story. One guy in particular had been eyeing the bartender up a lot of the night and now the drunken mess had finally opened his mouth.

“You’re hot” he started, voice slurred as the words rolled of his tongue.  
“Thanks for the compliment” she said before continuing on with her work.  
“When do you go on break”  
“Wouldn’t you like to know” she muttered, clearly uninterested.  
“Oh come on! Don’t you wanna go around the back with me?”   
“No thanks go find another pretty lady” she said.  
“What? Am I that ugly! It can be a quick one! You don’t even have to look at my face!” This guy was making Marcus annoyed, he knows it’s none of his business but the idea that he’s talking to her like she’s some sort of sex object angered him.

“I said no” she said, tone of voice now becoming harsh.  
As he leaned forward against the bar he went to reach for the woman’s arm and Marcus decided he had enough.  
“She said no” he spoke up causing both heads to turn  
“She’s serving your drinks so why don’t you be a bit more respectful hey?!” He said at the drunken man.  
The man leaned back in his seat before muttering a “fucking whore” under his breath. Marcus was about to step in and say something else before suddenly the women was grabbing the man by the shirt and pulling him close “wanna say that again?” She said as she looked him in the eyes.

“No?” She teased as the man looked at her in shock “get him out of here” she said as she shoved the man causing him to stumble back a little. One of the body guards of the venue took hold of the man and escorted him out the building.

“I didn’t need you to step in but thanks” she said as she turned to look at Marcus.  
“Yeah I can see that” he muttered as he raised an eyebrow before a drunk was being pushed towards him “on the house”  
“You don’t have to-“  
“No I insist” she said before smirking at him before cleaning the bar counter.

Once she was done cleaning the bar she came over to Marcus’ direction and leaned against the bar, facing him.  
“You got a name?” She asked which caused him to lift his head up with surprise.  
“Have you got a name?” He responded causing her to smirk.  
“You first, I always see you come in here and I’d like to know the name behind mystery guy” She said with almost a mischievous grin.  
“Marcus, do I get to know your name?” He Responded.  
“April” April...April is a nice name.

“Nice name for a beautiful lady” he said with a smirk causing her to raise her eyebrow.  
“Well aren’t you a charmer? You’re not gonna ask me to go around the back like the last guy are you?”  
“Of course not! I’m a classy guy!” he exclaimed   
“Course you are” she chuckled  
“What makes you think I’m not?”  
“Because you’re drinking in this shitty bar”  
“You work in this shitty bar”  
“True but it’s what helps me pay my bills So what do you do Marcus?” She asked as she leaned forward a little closer.  
“At the moment I just work in an office” he explained  
“You wear a suit?” She teased a little causing Marcus to shrug his shoulders “Yeah but it’s nothing special, I also do a little music on the side” he said causing her to raise her eyebrows with interest.  
“Oh? You sing?”   
“A little, play guitar too”  
“You think you could show me?” She asked as she tilted her head a little almost in a playful manner.  
“Oh I don’t have it with me-“  
“-I have one at my place”  
Oh......OH? The pin dropped, she was asking what he thinks she was asking right?

Marcus raised his eyebrows and eyes widened a little as he looked up at her with surprise. “I’ve just finished my shift if you wanna follow me” She whispered, her voice low before she moved away from him to grab her coat. As she put it on she looked back at Marcus with a smirk before she began to walk out the bar. Marcus smirked, downing the rest of his drink in one gulp before putting the glass down and following behind. 

........

“I don’t really know if this thing is in tune, I don’t really play guitar to be honest” she chuckled as she pulled it out of her closest for Marcus.  
“So why do you have one?”  
“I tried to learn but I didn’t have the time and patience apparently” she responded as she passed the guitar to him.  
He took it before strumming across the strings hearing the terrible sounding tune that followed behind “this is definitely not in tune” he laughed as he started working on tuning the guitar.

“It’s not everyday I invite a guy back to mine to tune my guitar” Said April as she sat down in front of him.  
“I’m just a special kind of guy huh?” Said Marcus with a smile as he gently strummed the strings, working out if they were in tune or not. 

“I think I have just about got it in tune...I think” he smirked before he put his fingers into position. He just began to strum a little tune, it was a little something he had be working on. It was a little nerve wracking he must admit, he’s played for small audiences before but something about playing in front of her sent his nerves in place. She was leaning back in her seat, a soft smile as she listened to him play.

That’s when he began to softly sing and her eyebrows raised up in surprise at what she was hearing. What he showed her was still a work in progress so it was definitely nerve wrecking for him to play original material. When he did finish she clapped her hands together with a smile on her face.  
“Nice to know that your weren’t bullshitting, you’ve got a nice voice” she said with a smile.

“You think so?” He asked, a smile on his face.   
“Yeah!” That’s when she got up and gently took the guitar from his hands and put it down somewhere on the floor next to the bed.  
Marcus felt himself getting a little flustered as April climbed into his lap before her fingers traveled into his hair. 

She looked down at Marcus, biting her lip a little “don’t be so shy” she whispered as she inched closer to his lips to pull him into a kiss. Before she could, Marcus was grabbing her hips and turning to push her onto the bed, causing her to yelp as he caught her by surprise and towered over her. A dark chuckle in her throat as Marcus inched his face closer to hers “who says I’m being shy?” He whispered to her lips before he pulled her into a kiss. 

.........

“Could I ask you something?” Asked April now sat up in bed while Marcus rested against the headboard.  
“How come you kept this on?” She asked as she pulled a little at the long sleeve shirt he was wearing. Marcus nervously swallowed “I um...I guess it’s a little personal but, I guess I have an insecurity?” He explained as she looked back at him.  
“Scars?” She asked and he nodded his head “Okay...that’s fine, if it makes you feel better I happen to find scars incredibly sexy” she smirked causing Marcus to start laughing.   
“Good to know”

As the laughter died down April was playing a little with the shirt she was currently wearing before she looked up at him “Can I be honest with you?...one night stands is not something I do...I mean if I’m honest you’ve kinda caught my eye for a while and even though we’ve only really met each other today...I like you” she confessed and Marcus was honestly surprised that a girl as beautiful as April and could probably get any guy she wanted had eyes for him? 

“I like you too”  
“Do you get what I’m trying to say?”  
“Yeah I do...and I’d like that” he said as he reached to take her hand, his thumb softly brushing across it as they softly smiled at each other.

........

Things seemed to be going well between the two, April and Marcus were now officially dating and for the first time in a while Marcus almost felt a little carefree.

They lay in bed, April was in her underwear while wearing one of Marcus’ buttoned up shirts that he uses for work. Music softly playing on the radio as she lay her head on his chest. “Okay who would be your free pass?” She asked causing Marcus to raise an eyebrow “free what?”  
“Free pass! If you could sleep with one other person apart from me who would it be?” She explained as she sat up a little, Marcus chuckled as he lay back in bed.  
“Theres this small comedian, he’s not hugely famous but something tells me he will be going places, heard of Richie Tozier?”   
“Richie who?”  
“Richie Tozier, that’s my free pass” he said causing April to chuckle.  
“Well if this Richie does get big and famous I’ll be sure to remember he’s your free pass...so you into guys too?” She asked as Marcus shrugged his shoulders “I don’t know, I just feel like I like who I like, doesn’t matter who they are you know?” He explained.  
“What about you? You have a free pass?” He Asked as April shrugged her shoulders.  
“I haven’t decided yet but I’ll be sure to let you know” she smirked as she gently slapped his arm.

As Marcus went to stretch, his shirt slid up a little to reveal some of his torso and that’s when April noticed the deep red scars. Marcus looked confused to what April was looking at but as he looked down to see his shirt had risen up a little his eyes widened before he quickly climbed out of bed and locked himself in the bathroom before April could call after him.

Marcus leaned against the bathroom door, clutching his body as he felt tears now burning up in his eyes. Letting out a shakey breath as he exhaled he attempted to blink them away. He heard the soft knock on the door before April’s voice “hey Marcus...I’m not going to judge you for what’s under the shirt, if you don’t want to talk about it or show me that’s okay...I’m not going to think of you any differently” she explained as Marcus could feel his lip trembling a little. 

“I know you’ve got scars because you told me, I just didn’t know what to expect that’s all....I’ve told you before but I happen to find scars hot” she said causing a sad chuckle to leave Marcus and he could sense her smile on the other side of the door. 

“You don’t have to be afraid to show me” She whispered as Marcus closed his eyes, taking a deep breath in before breathing out. Hesitantly he got up from the door and slowly unlocked it. As he opened the door there stood April with a comforting look in her eyes.

She watched as Marcus with shaking hands reached for the bottom of this shirt, slowly pulling it up before pulling the shirt over his head. He looked up at the sad look in April’s eyes as she scanned his body. Her eyes looking at the deep scars all over his torso and arms and now as she really looks there’s some on his ankles too, it had looked like something had clawed at him.

“Disgusting right?” He said as April shook her head.  
“Not at all....what happened? If you don’t mind me asking” She asked and that’s when Marcus broke down because he didn’t know how he got these scars, he doesn’t know where they came from.   
“I-I don’t know, I h-have no memory of it” he began to sob before April was rushing over to wrap her arms around him. His hands wrapped around her smaller frame as he pressed his head against her shoulder and sobbed. 

They kept hold of each other as April guided them both to sit on the floor. They sat there for a while as Marcus slowly calmed down “I keep having these dreams...terrifying dreams that almost feel like...memories and I feel like it’s linked to these but I...I can’t remember anything” he explained, voice sounding croaky and a little nasally from the crying.

He felt a shiver as April gently brushed her fingers across the scars on his arm before she was bringing his arm to her lips before pressing soft kisses across his arm causing his pulse to jump and his breath hitch. 

She leaned forward to press a kiss to his left cheek, then his right cheek and then the top of his head. Moving away she moved to look right into his eyes, the feeling of vulnerability as April was seeing a really sad and vulnerable side to him that she had never seen before. Her eyes so warm and comforting to him before she was taking Marcus by the hand and leading him back to bed.

For the first time in a very long time Marcus actually felt safe for once, the feeling of reassurance and protection.

...........

Most nights Marcus and April would head out either when she had a night off or he would hang out at the bar she worked at. He had made two friends, a guy named Brad and a woman named Tammy. They were loud, lively, obnoxious and April did not like either of them. 

April hated now much Marcus would drink around them and how they encouraged him. Brad looked like some drugged up biker and not that April would say it out loud but she thought Tammy looked like a skank. 

It came to a point where Marcus was meeting these people every night and coming home drunk out of his mind, leaving April to look after him and put him to bed. 

She spent most nights cleaning up his vomit and dragging him into bed before looking after him hungover the next day. He was an alcoholic, she should have known, now that she looks back it was so obvious, the signs were so there but because she was so in love with him she ignored it. He was always at the bar when she first met him and was always wanting a drink. She saw how he would take drink after drink after drink.

One night she couldn’t take anymore, there he was sitting on the couch and vomiting into the bucket before April broke down crying. Dropping to the floor, hands over her eyes as she began to sob  
“Why won’t you stop?” She sobbed and begged as Marcus groaned in response. 

He was now moving away from the bucket and leaning back on the couch as she continued to sob. She loved him and understood that this all probably links back to the scars on his body and the nightmares he stuffers but she didn’t know how much more she could take of this. 

Once she had calmed down she had gotten up and headed to bed, shutting the door behind her, she didn’t want to look at him or speak to him.

The next day Marcus was hungover, there was nothing new about that. Only this time April was done, she was tired of looking after him in this state. When she woke up straight away she got a glass of water on the kitchen and slammed it down on the table causing Marcus to jump a little with fright and groan at the pain.

“Sorry? You got a nasty headache?” She fake mocked.  
“What’s wrong? You’re angry” he groaned as he sat up, hand on his head.  
“You think? Because night after night after night I’m looking after your drunken ass, cleaning up your vomit and at your hands and knees taking care of you” she snapped.  
“I shouldn’t have to live like this, it’s not fair on me and I have never felt so weak and degraded in my life Marcus!” she continued as she felt herself tearing up.

She watched as Marcus lifted his head up a little to look at her “I’m sorry” he whispered, hand reaching out to take hers.  
“I’m so sorry, I love you so much and I don’t want you to feel that way” he said as he gently stroked her hand.  
“Then I need you to stop Marcus....please? For me? And most importantly for yourself” she begged, Marcus had never seen such a sad look in her eyes. Now that he looked at her he saw how miserable she looked and the dark circles under her eyes...he caused this.

“Okay...I’ll stop”

..........

That night April was working at the bar and in came Marcus coming through the doors with a bouquet of flowers. Now this was a first, April was never sure if she was even a flower kind of girl but the idea that Marcus was doing this to try and made amends made her feel happy.  
“For me?” She asked as he came over to the bar.  
“For the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on” he said with a smirk as he passed the flowers a smile forming on her face. 

He smiled as he watched her smell the flowers before putting them somewhere where they could stand up at the bar. In that moment it felt like how things used to be, before April really clicked on that he had a drinking problem. “I love you” He said as he took her hand and pressed a kiss to it.  
“Love you too” She whispered and just as she did Brad and Tammy came through the door, in that moment she felt her own heart sink because she knew nothing was going to come from it. Brad came over in his leather get up and Tammy in the ugliest leopard dress she had ever seen, making their way over to Marcus.  
“Hey Marcus!” Exclaimed Brad as he put his arms up in the air.  
“Hey guys!” He said as he pulled Brad into some sort of hug before doing to same to Tammy.

She hated them, she hated them so much, they stirred the pot of trouble that was already there. “Three shots of vodka please sweetheart” Asked Brad as April glared at him.  
“One for him?” She asked as she pointed at Marcus.  
“Yeah?”   
“I’m not serving Marcus” she said as the two raised their eyebrows in surprise.  
“Why not?” Asked Brad  
“Because he has a serious problem that’s why” she snapped back  
“It’s okay April, it’s just one drink” Said Marcus causing April’s eyes to widen. Why was she here? He’s never going to change is he?

“You’re never going to change” she whispered as she shook her head feeling the pain of the realisation sink in.  
“Marcus tell your girlfriend to stop being the boring bland bitch she is and give us a drink!” Spat Tammy and April was done. She grabbed a glass from under the table and poured a drink, looking directly at the girl that she calls a skank in her own head, next thing she knew she was throwing the contents of it all over Tammy.

Tammy gasped and backed away from the bar “now you just click your fingers if you want some more” she hissed, clicking her fingers before slamming the glass down on the bar and went to leave.  
“April!” Called out Marcus  
“No I’m done!” She spat before leaving the bar, slamming the door behind her, she will most likely be fired but she didn’t care.

As she got into her car and started to drive she started to think out all the moments between her and Marcus. She remembered when they first met and his passion for music, she remembered when she first saw his scars and how vulnerable and broken he looked. The drinking goes back to that, whatever happened to cause those scars, it resulted in him drinking, Marcus wants to forget.

Maybe she could talk to someone? Get advice from a help line, get him to go to meetings because she can’t let this go on. She loved Marcus and although she doesn’t think she can take anymore of this, something was telling her that she can’t bare the thought of leaving him to rot and drink to his death. 

She sighed, gripping the stirring wheel hoping that she wasn’t going to regret what she planned to do next as she turned her car around to go back.

...............

Marcus ended up joining Tammy and Brad for a drink, he’ll face the consequences of April in the morning. Shot after shot after shot with the duo before he was at a point where he felt tipsy and was a little off balance in his steps, feeling like the room was spinning. 

“I have an idea!” Started Brad before taking a big gulp of his drink shaking his head and letting out a little ‘whoo’ at how strong it was.   
“Why don’t us three head back to my place?!” He suggested causing Marcus to raise his eyebrows and Tammy to smirk.  
“Oh imagine all the fun we could have with Marcus joining us” smirked Tammy before taking her shot and slamming the glass on the table.  
Drunk Marcus in a way was completely oblivious to what they were suggesting as he weakly cradled his glass.  
“So what do you say handsome?” She asked as Marcus looked at the two. He shrugged he shoulders before taking his shot and slamming the glass down on the table.   
“Sure” he muttered before they all got out their seat to leave the bar.

Brad drove while Marcus sat in the passenger seat and Tammy in the back. Marcus didn’t know about the other two but he felt too weak and intoxicated from all the drinks to do anything as he sat in the car, feeling incredibly sick. Brad and Tammy seemed incredibly lively and not paying attention to the road as they drove.

In a way the drive helped him sober up a little as he looked at the road. They had the radio on while Brad and Tammy sang incredibly loud and badly out of tune to the music, Brad looking back at Tammy in the back and yelling out drunken words.  
Marcus looked at them and he felt like the car was swerving, as he looked back that the road that’s when he noticed a car coming straight for them.

“BRAD WATCH OUT!” He screamed out but it was too late as the car slammed into the other and flipped over. Marcus and Tammy screaming at the top of their lungs as the car toppled and tuned before landing upside down. Marcus sat in shock before spitting bits of broken glass that had fallen into his mouth as the smell of smoke hit him and his surroundings. He was covered in blood, he could feel it, warm against his face and he was now in agony.

As he turned to look at Brad there he sat in his seat, eyes open and lifeless. Marcus with shaking hands reached to check for a pulse as he felt himself sobering up a little, the shock of what had just happened knocking sense into him before a sob left his lips. Brad was dead, he was dead, he couldn’t feel a pulse and there he say in the chair, eyes wide, open and lifeless. That’s when he heard a loud blood curdling scream coming from the other side, in the direction of the car they hit. 

He squinted his eyes as he tried to focus on who was in the car, it was a girl with long brown hair...no it wasn’t just any girl...it was April. Marcus was now hysterical “APRIL!!” He screamed, trying to find his seatbelt to get out.  
“APRIL!” He screamed out again, hands yanking at the seatbelt before his trembling hands found the button to unbuckle the seatbelt.  
“APRIL I’M COMING!” He screamed as he fell out the seat and began to crawl to the window, lifting his feet to kick at the door, smashing the glass before crawling out, hands and arms now cut from glass but he didn’t care, he needed to get to April.

He got up onto his feet, still feeling tipsy as he made his way over to April’s car. She sat in her seat, cut on her head, nose bleeding as she was sobbing and panicking. “Baby I’m here, I’m here” he cried as he opened the car door and reached for her seatbelt.  
She sobbed and cried as her trembling hands found his jacket as he lifted her out of the car and moved her as far away from the crash.

As he put her down he felt himself grew weak “Marcus?” She whimpered before he dropped to the floor.  
“Marcus!” April’s panic was the last thing he heard and the look of her bloody face towering above him before he blacked out.

......

When Marcus woke up he was surrounded by bright light and the sound of machines beeping. His vision a little blurred as he adjusted before he saw someone standing at the end of the bed. As he vision adjusted he was it was April, a miserable look on her face along with a bandage at the top of her head and small cuts and grazes on her face.  
“A-April” he groaned, voice croaky as he reached his hand out for her but she didn’t take it.  
“Do you remember what happened?” She asked.

Marcus swallowed as he thought hard to try and remember what had happened “I...I was in the car, B-Brad was driving and Tammy in the b-back, he wasn’t looking” he explained as April’s hands clenched the backboard of the bed.  
“Brad is dead...they found high levels of alcohol in his system, they said he died on impact, Tammy is fine, in shock but again high levels of alcohol in her system...same with you” she explained, voice breaking at the last part.  
He did this, he killed Brad...he should have been responsible and stopped him from getting in the car and driving but he didn’t...he was to blame for all of this. 

He watched as her lip trembled and her eyes started to tear up “I turned around to head back to the bar to offer my help and support, get you help to stop....but you don’t want to stop do you?”   
“That’s not true, I want to stop, I do!”  
“Then why drink like you did tonight? Why get in the car with a clearly drunk driver?! Why put me through so much pain and misery?!” She begged and now Marcus was tearing up.  
“Because I don’t know how to stop....I’m scared that these nightmares and visions will come back” he explained as his lip began to tremble.

April titled her head a little, a look of empathy in her eyes “then I can get someone to talk to you here, get someone to point you in the right direction of professional help” she offered as Marcus nodded his head.  
“Please” he whispered  
“Okay....but I...I can’t be around for this, I need to focus on myself for once and you need time to help yourself get better, to get over this addiction” Marcus felt his heart sink at what he was hearing, his chest felt heavy.

“N-no April I love you, I love you”  
“I love you too...but we can’t be around each other it’s not healthy...for either of us” she said as tears where now coming down.  
“April please!”  
“I’m so sorry....goodbye Marcus” she whispered before biting her lip as an attempt to stop the tears from coming before turning away.  
“No, please April, April please come back!” He sobbed and cried out, heavy feeling in his chest as his body shook with sobs. 

........

He had time to calm down as he lay in bed, staring into space. Turning his head as he heard the door open only to see it was Tammy, body covered with cuts and still in that god awful leopard dress. “Hey handsome, how you feeling?”   
Marcus was silent, how was he feeling? Pain? Heartbroken? Guilt? Feeling like a killer?

Tammy had made her way over and sat on the bed at his side “she dumped you?”   
“Yeah” He said quietly, words barely coming out.  
“Guess it’s just me and you, how about once you get out we have some celebratory drinks to celebrate surviving and now being single” she suggested causing Marcus to sharply turn to look at her, eyes wide.  
“You serious? Brad is dead! We almost died! April almost died because we were all drunk! Because Brad was drunk behind the wheel!” He said as his voice grew louder.

Tammy sighed “look things happen but we need to move on”  
“Don’t you care that he’s dead?!”   
“Like I said, it’s sad but things happen we just need to move on-“  
“-are you not listening?! This happened because of the drinks! Because we were too fucking drunk! Brad is dead!”  
“Marcus-“  
“No I’m done! I’m done!”  
“You’re not thinking straight”  
“Oh I’m thinking straight...I’m thinking straight for the first time in my life!”   
“You need me Marcus”  
“Get out” He said, tone of voice low as he gave to order.  
“No M-“  
“GET OUT!” He yelled at the top of his lungs in anger, loud enough that probably most of the hospital would have turned to look in the direction of his room.

Tammy looked back at him, shaking her head before turning away and leaving his room. Marcus let out a shakey breath as he lay back in his bed in a way feeling relief wash over him that someone who was being such a bad influence has now gone from his life by his choice.

An hour later a woman came into the room who seemed to be some sort of Doctor. “Hello Mister Hayes, how are you feeling?” She asked as she moved to sit on the chair next to his bed.  
“Like crap” he scoffed.  
“I had a friend of yours, April Wesley come and speak to us about your difficulties with alcohol” she explained, hearing April be called a friend hurt more than anything.

Marcus swallowed as he could feel tears prickling his eyes as they threatened to leave.  
“I...I don’t know how to stop” he whispered.  
“Mister Hayes the treatment and guidance we offer will only benefit you if you want to stop-“  
“-I do” he whimpered as the tears now fell down.  
“I want to stop....I need help because I can’t live like this, please! Please help me” He sobbed as the doctor looked at him.  
“We can help, I’ve checked with the doctor and the earliest we can get you in for treatment and support is tomorrow” explained the doctor as Marcus nodded his head.  
“T-thank you” 

It was difficult years through his life, fighting this addiction he had, fighting the urge to take a drink when it grew tough. He learned to find other ways to distract himself when the urges came, in the end turning to music.

He would spend time writing lyrics down even if it was just random lines that came to mind and strumming a few notes on his guitar. It got to a point where he began performing these original songs to small venues and the next thing he knew he was signing onto a small record label and his name was getting out there.

When the radio host Molly Morgan discovered his music that’s when it really set off and more people were listening to his music. It was a long recovery but now he had been sober for all these years but it didn’t stop the nightmares and visions he suffered.

.................

“You’re not a killer Marcus”   
“Yeah I am....I could have stopped it, she begged me to stop drinking and I didn’t listen and that meant I was too drunk to stop a drunk man getting behind the wheel of a car” Responded Marcus as Bella sighed.  
“Still didn’t kill him, you feel guilt because you where there but you didn’t kill him” she said as Marcus bit his lip and looked down as his arms.

“I’m never going to be free am I?” said Marcus as he looked away from his arms and turned to Bella.  
“First of all you’re only fifteen years sober, that’s a great achievement! In regards to the nightmares and visions maybe confronting this clown is the only way we can be free, in a way it had haunted us for twenty seven years without us realising, and I wish you told me the truth about what happened that night because I would have been there no matter what” she explained as Marcus let out a shakey breath.

“We need you Marcus, we’re a team remember? Bells and Mucus?” She said with a smirk as Marcus let out a sad chuckle.   
“So what do you say? Are Bells and Mucus ready to kill a child eating clown?” 

Marcus sat there as he thought about it. Maybe she was right, maybe this is the only way he’ll be free from the demons of his past, maybe this is the only way he can battle and confront his fears.

He turned to look at Bella as he took a deep breath in before breathing out “Okay let’s do this”


	10. Chapter Ten - Final Showdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group finally confront their fears.  
Warning - Physical abuse, verbal abuse and violence

As they drove to the hotel, giving the circumstances she was actually surprised to hear Marcus laugh. “What?” She asked as she looked at him with a little amusement.  
Marcus chuckled as he shook his head “Sorry it’s just...I remembering things that we got up to...the time I broke your mom’s car” he said with a smirk as he looked at her for a second before bringing his eyes back to the front. As the memory began to clear up that’s when laughs began to erupt between the two “you mean the time y-you broke the window with your ass?!” She laughed, struggling to get the words out because of how hard she was laughing.  
“Yeah that’s the one!” giggled Marcus. Marcus Remembers it very clearly, he spotted Bella in the car while Mrs Morgan had gone back into the house get something she had forgotten. Marcus thought it would be funny to try and make Bella laugh in the car, it started off with stupid dances and then Marcus decided it would be funny to jump up and bounce his butt off the car window, only problem was his ass ended up breaking the window. Both stood in shock and Mrs Morgan was definitely not happy.

“We were grounded for two weeks and not allowed to see each other out of school during that time, who payed for the window?” giggled Bella.  
“My mom” Muttered Marcus as Bella darkly chuckled.  
“We did so much shit together, god our parents were so done with us!” Breathed Bella as she leaned back in her seat. It was quiet as Marcus began to think...Bella was his best friend, IS his best friend but for the first time he feels like he knows nothing about her...what has she been up to for all this time? It actually hurt him finding out she has a little sister because he wasn’t around for her arrival...they had drifted apart. Even now he would do anything for his Bells and Blonde Morgan too even though he had just met her.

“I know that we have reunited and stuff and we’re remembering things again....but now that I think of it we haven’t really talked about us, you know? Like what we’ve been up to since Derry” Started Marcus as he broke the silence.  
“I mean you know basically all my dark secrets but I still know nothing about you and what you’ve been up to” he continued as Bella looked away from the window to look at him.

“What do you wanna know?” She asked.  
“Well...did you and Eddie reunite and declare your love for each other?” He teased as Bella rolled her eyes.  
“No we did not! I have no idea where Eddie is or what he’s up to but no I’m not a part of his life” she chuckled.  
“Okay but hear me out, you gotta admit that you guys were just awkward” he said with a smirk.  
“We weren’t that bad! I guess I was just more distracted by his little cute face than actually trying to speak to him” she shrugged.  
“Oh tell me about it! Did I ever tell you that he helped me when I got into that fight with Bowers?” He asked causing Bella to look at him surprised.  
“No you did not”  
“Well his cute little face was all up in mine while he held a tissue over my nose, I mean I wouldn’t have minded if he kissed me better” he suggested as he shrugged his shoulders.  
“Really?!” Laughed Bella as she leaned forward.  
“Really! I mean Richie Tozier too, his jokes had my heart doing little flips back then and then I crushed on him when he was turning up on my tv screen, I even told April that he would be my free pass...I guess it’s just meant to be” he suggested and now Bella was laughing as she leaned back in her seat.

“Is that why you didn’t want me and Eddie together? Because you wanted him to sweep you off your feet?” She smirked  
“I think with his height I would have been sweeping him off his feet! But no...do you wanna know the real reason why I didn’t like you and Eddie together?” He Asked.  
“Go on then? Why?” She chuckled with an amused look on her face.  
“Because I think you should have been with Ethan” he said and suddenly the light atmosphere in the car grew quiet and a little tension began to grow.

“Ethan?” She asked, she was a little surprised to hear that was Marcus’ reason if she was honest. He thought her and Ethan should have been together?  
“It’s just...it’s just the way he was so protective over you that night at the movie theatre, you should have seen him Bells, he didn’t even think about what could have been on the other side of that door at the movie theatre, he just ran and pulled you out without even thinking....I just, I couldn’t have seen Eddie doing anything like that, he was a nice kid an all but I don’t think he would have been as protective of you as Ethan was” Explained Marcus and Bella started thinking about the safety and comfort she felt from him all those years ago. 

“Do you not feel that way about him?” Asked Marcus, eyes still on the road.  
“I...I don’t know, all those years ago I couldn’t stop thinking about him after it happened, I guess he made me feel safe. He was always so sweet and that time I helped him with his knee he told me that he’d always look out for me and I just...I just couldn’t help but smile and feel warm inside” she explained before she sighed.  
“If I’m honest back home I haven’t been able to keep a relationship, Molly makes fun of me for it but I don’t know I just...I just felt like they were never the right guy for me and when I came back here and saw Ethan I just felt all those warm and happy feelings like I did all those years ago” she continued before Marcus started to laugh.

“What’s so funny?” She snapped as he continued to laugh, shaking his head.  
“Do you hear yourself?! You have feelings for him, you did back then and you do now, you were just blinded by Eddie’s cute little face and freckles” explained Marcus as her eyes widened.  
“I don’t know how I feel about Ethan-“  
“Yeah you do! You were flirting with him back at the cafe, even your sister could see it with the looks she was giving me, I saw you going to grab for Ethan’s hand when you went on your walk. You’re so obvious” he laughed as Bella shook her head, biting her tongue as it poked her cheek.  
“It’s not that simple”   
“Yeah it is, look we may die tonight and this might be your only chance to be happy, even if it just for a second. All the things you’re describing about how Ethan makes you feel that’s how I felt about April, happy, safe and this sickening, warm, disgusting feeling inside me...just don’t ignore that feeling” 

Bella was silent, never did she think that Marcus would be giving her advice on her own love life. Maybe she is in love with Ethan, she doesn’t know, she knows she felt something back then as a kid but at the time she was crushing hard on Eddie so she ignored it and pushed it aside. She doesn’t know what love feels like so she can’t be certain that what she’s feeling for Ethan is love.

“Did you stop loving April?” She asked before Marcus scoffed, hands gripping the stirring wheel a little.  
“I never stopped”  
..............

The rest of the group had met up at the Derry Hotel while they waited for Bella to hopefully return with Marcus.  
“I can’t believe I forgot that my own cousin was killed...murdered by Henry fucking Bowers” Said Seb as he stared into space as the three sat around a table.  
“I’m so sorry Seb” Muttered Ethan in response as he put his hand on his friend’s shoulder as a way of comforting him. He remembers all those years ago when Seb turned up at his door sobbing and crying his eyes out because of what had happened. He remembers how they lay in bed and just talked that night about anything and everything while Ethan was there to comfort him. He can’t imagine how Seb must be feeling now that he’s experiencing this pain and grief again. 

He was remembering other things, he remembers how him and Seb would talk all the time about running away together because their lives were so shitty in Derry. Seb hated the memories it had brought him, the clown and the death of his cousin and Ethan hated his father, he hated how unwanted he made him feel. At the age of seventeen they had planned it, they both saved up money, even stole a little from their parents and both packed a bag. Seb met at Ethan’s house once it got to midnight and they left, the only made it as far as the kissing bridge before all of these doubts began to fill them both. He remembers the tearful heart to heart him and Seb both had as they leaned against the kissing bridge before an hour or two later they decided in the end to stay and finish their final year before heading off to college...because they couldn’t let their shitty lives destroy their future.

“How are you feeling? about your dad?” Asked Seb as he swallowed, Ethan scoffed, shaking his head. If he was honest he didn’t know...should he care? Should be not? “I...I don’t know, I feel like I shouldn’t care because he caused me so much emotional pain but I....I still feel this bit of grief for him...maybe because he was still my dad, he was still blood?” Explained Ethan as he nervously swallowed, he bit the inside of his cheek as the feelings were now filling him because he now felt Seb’s hand on his shoulder.

“Well if we make it out of this shithole, we’ll take the time to think things over, grieve together” Said Seb as he gave a sad smile, Ethan smiled back, placing his hand over Seb’s hand. As Ethan looked over at the table he noticed how awfully quiet Molly was. She was biting her nails and her knee was frantically bouncing. 

“You okay?” Asked Ethan and he moved to look in her direction.  
Molly jumped a little, being pulled out of her thoughts as she turned to face him “um yeah I...I guess I’m just trying to process what I just witnessed, the clown...I only came here to follow my sister because she was acting weird” she muttered before she went back to biting her nails.  
“Do you want to talk about what you saw?” Ethan asked next, she can’t tell them about what happened, what if she tells her secret and they think she’s disgusting and look at her like the crowd did.

“It’s nothing...it just stood in the crowd laughing at me, guess it just freaked me out because I now know what you’ve all been saying is real” she muttered as her knee continued to bounce.

That’s when the front door opened and in came Bella and Marcus. All three heads turned to look at the two as they quietly came into the hotel lobby and sat to join the others.  
“I...I guess we can all agree that it’s never going to leave us unless we confront it” Started Bella as the others looked at each other with anxious looks on their faces.

“It dragged us all back here and something tells me it will find a way to drag us back or stop us from leaving” she continued before holding her hands together.  
“So what? You’re saying that we should just go and try and kill this fucking child eating clown? That’s currently trying to eat us? It almost killed Marcus back there!” Argued Seb before pointing at Marcus who looked awfully on edge.

“What other choice do we have?!” Responded Bella as Seb got up and began to pace up and down the room.  
“I want to die an old age, not eaten by a man eating clown”  
“Bella this is crazy, whatever this is or whatever the fuck I’ve been dragged into I don’t think us trying to fight it is going to help” Explained Molly, voice quivering a little as she tried to talk Bella out of it.  
“You think this is crazy right Marcus?” Asked Seb before Marcus let out a shakey breath.

“I have been haunted by this fucker almost my whole life now...as much as I don’t want to do this...what if this is the only way? To finally be free?”  
“Oh we’ll be free alright, because we’ll all be buried six feet under!” Snapped Seb as Molly now got up from her seat in a panic.  
“Why did I come here? Fuck why did I come here?!” She whimpered.

“Maybe there is a way” Muttered Ethan but now Molly and Seb were in too much of a panic and Bella was now trying to talk sense into them. There was a few ‘it’s the only way’ s and ‘you’re fucking insane’s said across the room.  
“Could you just-“ Ethan tried to speak up but the others continued to speak over him. Marcus was quiet, he didn’t really want a say in the situation so he just watched it continue on between the three.

“Let me-“  
Again the voices were growing louder among the group and Ethan was now feeling this anger. All his life he experienced this, a shadow, someone in the background, someone that everyone walked and talked all over...not anymore.

“QUIET!” He yelled causing the whole group to go quiet and look at Ethan surprised and Marcus looking with surprised eyebrows raised, first time he’s ever seen quiet Ethan raise his voice and wow, how loud it was.

“Now if you let me speak for once in my life instead of talking over me I have an idea” He now said in a calm but harsh tone.  
“Every time IT’s come for us we’ve all been alone right? Then we find the clown and go after it together, it must feel strong, powerful when it targets someone alone so we find it and stick together and we fight whatever it throws at us because if we confront our fears and show that we’re no longer scared....it has no power over us....it grows weak because it starts to starve” Explained Ethan as the others now looked at each other.

“If this does work, which I doubt, no offence Ethan...then how do we find it? Because it’s always appeared when we’re alone” Asked Marcus.  
“Do you remember that creepy house on Niebolt street? That’s where I was attacked as a child, I remember the door to the house opening while it whispered my name...like it was trying to draw me into the house” he explained before Seb spoke up.  
“What’s where I was attacked too...that’s where I saw Vic” He Muttered as he swallowed the lump forming in his throat.  
“That must be where it lives” whispered Bella. 

“So what? We just head up to this creepy ass house or something?” Asked Molly.  
“Something like that yeah” Muttered Ethan.   
“Are you fucking insane Ethan?!” Whined Seb as he walked closer to him.  
“He’s right...what if this is the only way? Like Ethan said, everytime it’s come for us we’ve ran away...if we fight back, Show it that we’re not scared...” Explained Bella.  
“Then it no longer has power over us” finished Marcus.  
“Exactly” Muttered Ethan. 

They were all terrified and they knew it, but what if that all changed when together “we’ve never confronted this thing together and I don’t think it will let us leave Derry so our only way to be free is to stick together to take it down, to confront our fears” continued Ethan as Bella nervously swallowed.

“I’m in” she said before moving to stand next to Ethan. Molly rubbed her hands over her face before she exhaled “can’t believe I’m dragging myself into this but I can’t let you go alone so I guess I’m in too” she said as she went to join Bella and Ethan.

Ethan saw the fear and panic on Seb’s face, a whimper leaving his lips. Seb didn’t want to do this, but he didn’t want to abandon his best friend, that summer Ethan meant everything to him, he became his best friend and was accepting and there for him when he really needed it....he can’t leave him to face their childhood fear alone.

“Goddamn it Ethan” he whimpered before joining the group, Ethan putting his hand on Seb’s shoulder and gently squeezing as an attempt to calm him. They all turned to look at Marcus who rubbed his hands over his face and nervously bounced his knee. “What about you? Are Bells and Mucus going to be a team again?” Asked Bella with a sad smile.

He can’t go on with this constant pain and torture from his experience twenty seven years ago. Maybe Bella is right, confronting his demons is the only way he’ll really be free and him and Bella did make a promise all those years ago that they’d fight to defend each other from the clown. Moving his hands away from his face he looked up at the group “fuck it, I’m ready to end this fucker” 

......

It was completely dark in the area as they stood at the front porch of the house. This was it, they were at the house and god knows if they’ll be making it out alive, the tension was causing nerves to build inside them all. 

“So, do we knock on the door or?” Asked Seb obviously as an attempt to try and lighten the mood but it didn’t seem to be working.   
“I...I guess we just go in” Muttered Ethan as he slowly took a step forward, the rest of the group following alongside him. This was it, they were really entering its house.

As they did it was just dark, the place looking like a broken down, abandoned house. Torn up wallpaper and creaking floorboards, a broken mirror, pieces of it smashed all over the floor and missing children posters all over one wall...it was like some sort of sick and twisted trophy collection.  
Bella walked over to look at the posters before she recognised some of the faces, Georgie Denbrough, Betty Ripsom, Patrick Hockstetter and many more, all of them killed by this monster.

“IT definitely lives here” she whispered before turning away from the posters to face the group. Marcus walked over to the broken mirror, finding a huge shard of class on the floor. Crouching down, being as careful as possible, he found the biggest piece of broken glass among the pile and slipped it into his pocket.

That’s when they heard a deep grumble coming from below them causing everyone to look down at the floor. “Okay we need to get out of this room” Said Ethan as he grabbed for Bella’s arm and made his way out the front room and up the stairs with the others following behind them. 

The deep rumble got louder and louder “it must know we’re here” Said Marcus and Bella could feel Ethan holding her arm tighter. As they looked that’s when they noticed a single red balloon floating at the end of the corridor, same red blood that always appeared before terrorising them “shit” whispered Seb. In a panic they began to split off, Seb and Molly ran off into one room while Marcus ran into another while Ethan and Bella ran into one together. 

Molly and Seb stood close together as it grew silent, the rumbling had stopped. As she heard Bella screaming, sounding like it was coming from far away both Seb and Molly ran to to door to try and get it open. “It’s locked” whispered Seb, voice growing with panic  
“Bella!” Molly yelled as they both began to bang on the door in a failed attempt to get it open. They were trapped, the balloon wait bait and they fell for it.

“Molly’s got a secret, a dirty little secret” a chilling whisper filled the room causing both of them to turn back around to find the source of the voice.  
“Shall I tell him Molly?” the voice taunted as suddenly the ground was breaking apart, both of them grabbing onto each other as they backed up against the door. As they did a rotten decaying arm broke through the door, bits of wood being thrown across the room and grabbed onto Seb causing both of them to yell out in fear. 

Seb forced himself out of its grip before moving away from the door, both now standing in the centre of the room as rotted decaying hands began to emerge from the floor, breaking through and trying to grab at them. Bits and pieces of wood panels being thrown around the room as these hands broke through. All while this was happening the chant continued on  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret”  
“Molly has a secret, a dirty little secret” mixed with other voices filled the room mixed in with the chant “freak” “disgusting” “don’t touch me” “you’re no sister of mine” insults that scared her, insults that she feared would be said if anyone where to know.

Seb panicked as hands now brushed against his legs and tried to grab at him. It’s not real, it’s not real, this is just an attempt to scare him, to feed from his fear. He remembered what Ethan said back at the hotel about how they needed to fight back. 

But how could he? He was downright terrified, the rotted decaying hands now gripping tighter onto him and Molly causing them both to scream out in fear. This was it, this was how he was going to die...dragged down by zombie hands, completely forgetting about the door being broken apart by a zombie grabbing for him that’s when he saw the face of Vic, pushing himself through the now hole in the door. Vic’s skin getting caught on it and ripping apart from his body, he wanted to throw up, his mouth felt strange as he thought back the urge to start heaving. 

Next thing he knew the hands grabbing him pulled them both down on the floor and Vic was charging after him. He tried to wriggle his feet out the grip of the hands grabbing him as Vic launched forward towards him. Seb yelled out as his free hands reached up to stop the decaying corpse from falling on top of him. He could feel the rotten decaying flesh against his hands, blood around Vic’s throat slowly dripping onto him.

As Molly had her hands free, she quickly lifted herself up trying to ignore the chant and insults that seemed to be getting louder and louder and dug her nails into one of the hands, scratching at the skin causing it to screech before letting go. She tried to ignore the feel of blood and decaying flesh under her nails. As she quickly stood up a dark voice chuckled “should I tell them your secret Molly?” She recognised it was the voice of the clown.

She needed to stand strong, it was the only way that they would be getting out “GO AHEAD!” She yelled out before her boot slammed hard onto the hand that was grabbing her ankle seconds ago, the feel of bones breaking and blood pooling under her boot before she was grabbing for the zombie on top of Seb and throwing it off him. 

Seb gasped as he looked up at Molly before she was holding her hand out for him to take. Pulling him back up Seb saw zombie Vic pulling himself back up.   
“You want to tell everyone my secret? Go ahead!” She yelled out before stomping on another hand in the ground.

“Tell everyone my secret because I could give a flying fuck who knows anymore!” She yelled out and she leaned down to snap one of the arms and throwing it across the room. She was fighting back, she was confronting her fear and that’s what Seb needed to do.

As zombie Vic came charging towards him again he grabbed hold of the zombified figure and threw him just like Molly did moments ago. He needed to end this, as painful and heartbreaking it is because of who it is...it needed to end.

He made his way over to Vic, a hand reaching out from the ground to grab his ankle before Seb leaned down and pulled it away from his ankle, with force snapping the hand back as it broke apart, blood and flesh covering his fingers but he didn’t care anymore. He knew that this was just something that the clown had created to scare him, none of this was real.

As Vic went to get back up Seb shoved him down onto the floor again, the sound of fragile bones breaking in his ears. He swallowed as he stood over his rotted decaying cousin   
“I’m sorry Vic...but you’re not real” he muttered before he lifted his foot and brought it down on the zombies head. Lifting the shoe up before bringing it down again, again and again and again. He ignored the screeches and groans from the zombie and the feel of the flesh and bones under his shoe as he yelled out and slammed his foot down one final time before silence.

Seb was now panting as he felt this adrenaline wash over him, turning to look at Molly who had broken the last hand from the ground as she turned back to look at him. She was so focused of destroying the zombie hands threatening to drag them down that she didn’t realise that chanting and insults had stopped once she started shouting that she didn’t care anymore.

“You okay?” He asked as Molly nodded her head.  
“Yeah, you?”  
“I think s-“ that’s when he noticed a red balloon now floating in the room causing them both to pause...fuck red balloons, this must be a final attempt at trying to scare him, he’s not going to let that happen. Without thinking Seb grabbed a piece of bone off the floor and walked over to the balloon, bursting it.  
“Fuck red balloons”

............

When Bella and Ethan ran into a room it grew silent as they looked at each other with panic. Next thing they knew a force was splitting them away from each other causing them to go flying onto opposite sides, Bella being thrown into one room while Ethan got thrown into anyone.

Ethan slammed into the wall as he fell back, looking up he saw Bella in another room. “Bella” he muttered as he got up and ran towards her but as they got closer to each other the door slammed shut. He reached down to the door knob, twisting it to open but it was locked.   
“Ethan it’s locked!” She yelled out, voice filled with panic as Ethan tried banging on the door.

Next thing he heard was Bella screaming “Bella!”  
“ETHAN THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN!” She began to scream, voice sounding terrified and filled with panic.  
Ethan continued to bang on the door as he heard Bella’s terrified screams and now sobs.  
“Bella it’s not real! Listen to my voice and only my voice!”  
“Ethan!” She sobbed  
“Everything is going to be okay, I promise you, I’m not going to let anything happen to you!” He called out but she continued to scream and sob.

“So....you wanna be an artist when you grow up?” Ethan furrowed his eyebrows together as he paused what he was doing at the door at the sound of his father’s voice.  
Slowly as he turned around he was in his living room and his father was at the table, passing his red notebook back to his younger self.  
“Maybe, I don’t know yet...I mean I really like to draw, maybe I could sell my art and get us enough money to move out of Derry and get a big house”  
“Is that right?” Ethan knew what was coming next, the beer bottle.  
“Yeah the house would be hu-“ he watched as his younger self expanded his arms out and knocked the bottle over.

He watched in horror as his dad grew silent and now turned to face him, not his younger self but him.  
“Go to your room Ethan” he said a voice so neutral but so sinister. Ethan felt his heart pounding in his chest as his father’s eyes were on him “NOW ETHAN!” He bellowed as he now came charging towards him and Ethan yelled out in panic.

As his father went to swing for him Ethan dodged out the way but fell back against the wall in panic. “Dad! Dad it’s me! Stop!” He called out in panic as his dad made his way over to him, hands up in surrender. Eyes wide with panic as his dad grabbed his hair and slammed his head into the wall causing a weak cry to leave his lips at the pain.  
“You gonna cry and beg like the little coward you are?!” His dad hissed and that’s when Ethan realised his own body was shaking with sobs, tears coming down his face.

“You’re a pathetic little freak!” He hissed as loud sobs left Ethan, his lips trembling as he turned his head away from his dad. He could feel his dad so close to him, breath hot against his neck as Ethan sobbed and cried.  
“You’re gonna die alone down here Ethan!” He spat and that’s when Ethan could hear Bella’s screams and cries again.

“Bella!” He called out weakly and suddenly his dad’s hands were no longer in his hair but now around his throat. He gasped as his hands reached down as he tried to claw at the hands around him, the evil, devilish look in his father’s eyes, something he had never seen before and it terrified him.  
“B-Bella!” He choked out as he continued to hear her screams and sobs, if he was going to die then he needed to tell her how he felt before he did.

“B-BELLA I L-LOVE YOU!” He cried out and Bella felt like everything around her stopped for a moment as she heard the words.  
“S-Since I was t-Twelve! When you-when you g-gave me a p-pen when I-I forgot m-mine!” He choked out, she began to remember, the look of the quiet little boy in her class, rummaging through his bag for a pen, he remembers him frantically looking in his bag because the teacher always gave detentions to people who didn’t have a pen. She remembers she got up from her table and gave him one and he had this look in his eyes, a surprised look and almost something that should could only describe as a little twinkle in his eyes...that was Ethan...it was so obvious now that she thinks about it.  
“I’D D-DO ANY-ANYTHING FOR Y-YOU!” He continued to choke out.

Bella began to work on kicking the door down, feeling the walls getting closer and closer to her as she panicked, she needed Ethan, she need to see him, she needed Ethan with her. She could feel the walls and ceiling getting closer and closer to her and she felt like she couldn’t breathe “ETHAN!” She screamed and sobbed as she curled herself into a ball on the floor like all those years ago. This was it, Ethan was in love with her, someone so worthy of her time and she was never going to experience it.

Ethan could hear her banging on the door as she screamed and cried out his name...she heard him, she heard him and now she’s trying to get to him. He could feel his airways closing up as his dad’s hands squeezed tighter and tighter around his neck, he can’t die like this Bella needs him...she must feel something back right? For her to frantically start screaming his name and trying to kick the door down right? He’s not going to die alone, he won’t allow it.

“You’ve always been alone Ethan, no one cares about you” He darkly chuckled as Ethan tried to claw at his hands while gasping out, trying to get as much oxygen as he could. IT was wrong, he had Seb his best friend, he had Marcus and Molly and he had Bella.

With all the energy he had he raised his foot up and kicked as hard as he could causing his dad to break his grip from him, hands releasing from his throat as he fell back. Ethan coughed and gasped, hunching forward as he felt the air coming back into him. “You’re wrong!” He groaned, getting up before he swung his fist up and punched his dad.   
“I have people that care about me and love me, you were so bitter and angry about mom that you blamed it on me!” he continued as he punched him again.  
“I would have gave you everything but you couldn’t give a shit about me...but now I don’t care anymore” he spat.

“That’s what you think? You will always feel the pain...the loneliness and isolation” his dad darkly chuckled, eyes now glowing amber.  
“NOT ANYMORE!” Yelled Ethan as he ran to the dining room table, remembering the glass bottle he knocked over all those years ago as his dad came charging after him.

As Ethan grabbed the bottle, smashing it over the table his father grabbed him again, turning him around and slamming him into the table before his hands were at his throat again. “Bye Ethan” He darkly chuckled.  
“FUCK YOU!” Ethan yelled out before he swung the broken bottle up and stabbed it right into his father’s eye. His father yelled out, letting go of Ethan again before stumbling back, Ethan stood up, making his way over to his father’s body as it dropped to the floor, blood profusely pouring out. He stood there watching him, breathing heavily.

“Now who’s alone” he whispered before the embodiment of his father crumbled to dust and was gone. He placed his hand over his throat as he felt the pain of the hands that were around him moments ago as he groaned.  
“ETHAN!” Bella sobbed and that’s when Ethan remembered, the walls were closing in.

“BELLA! BELLA!” He screamed as he ran back to the door, kicking as hard as he could to break the door down. Yelling out as he slammed his foot into it, his yells and cries getting louder and louder each time as he hit the door harder and harder, feeling the frustration of it showing no signs of opening. As he cried out one more time and hit the door as hard as he could, it broke open and there was Bella curled up in a ball, boxed in by the walls and ceiling getting closer and closer to her, almost about to squash her.

Like all those years ago, Bella felt an arm grab her and yank her out of the room before she was enveloped by a warm body holding her as she collapsed forward into it. “Hey it’s me, it’s me, you’re okay, I’ve got you” the same words she remembers all those years ago back at the movie theatre, the same hands on each side of her cheek moving her head to look at him, the same soft, comforting brown eyes from all those years ago. “You’re okay, you’re okay” he whispered, his hands trembling against her face, the same face that she couldn’t stop thinking about all those years ago, the only difference was he was older but he was still the same caring person...the one that’s always been there. He loved her...he loves her, he told her, since he was twelve. That’s when it began to click, god why didn’t she realise sooner?

“The drawing...all those years ago under the tree....it was you” She whispered as a shaking hand reached out for his face. His eyes wide with realisation about what she was talking about “it was you” she whispered again.

Before anything else could happen Seb and Molly came running through the door. “Hey you guys okay?!” Panted Seb as Ethan and Bella turned to look at the two covered in some sort of blood.  
“Bella!” Said Molly as she ran over to her sister as Seb ran over to Ethan.

“Jesus Ethan what happened? Your neck is fucking bruised” he said, eyes wide as his hands went to gently touch his neck.  
“Daddy issues...I’m okay” he muttered with a sad smirk as an attempt of a joke as he stood up to face Seb.   
“You?” He asked next.  
“Zombies and cousin issues” he responded causing Ethan to chuckle a little.

“Bella...I...the entire time I’ve been here I’ve been tortured and tormented by this fucking thing because of something I’ve been hiding about myself” Started Molly as she pulled Bella up.  
“But I feel like I need to tell you because this torment will never leave me if I don’t, I had to put on a brave face and act like I don’t care if people knew in order for me to get out and maybe it’s something I need to continue on in my life” she continued as Bella gripped her arms, looking at her with concern.

“Molly?”  
“Bella I’m....i’m gay...I’ve always known I have been but I’ve been too scared of what people would think of me, that clown was calling it my dirty little secret” she whimpered, voice breaking as she felt close to tears...she’s told her sister and now there’s no going back.  
Bella tilted her head a little and gave a soft smile “it’s okay, I always knew....I’ve just been waiting to hear it from you” She whispered as Molly looked at her eyes wide with surprise.

“You don’t think I’m disgusting do you?” She whispered, scared that if she speaks up any louder her voice will embarrassingly break. Bella shook her head “no, of course not” she said before pulling Molly into a hug and for the first time in her life Molly just felt this sense of relief wash over her. She gripped Bella tight as she rested her head on her sisters shoulders, close to tearing up at the relief she now felt.

Ethan looked back at the sisters holding each other tightly “reminds me of when I told you about Stan” Said Seb as he gave a little smile.  
“I became confident about who I was and that was because of you” he continued as he placed a hand on his shoulder.  
“You’re my best friend, I’d never judge you” Ethan whispered with reassurance as he placed his hand on top of Seb’s. As Seb looked at Ethan, that’s when he noticed the look he was giving Bella.  
“Ethan?”   
“I’ve told her....I thought I was going to die and I told her” he whispered as Seb raised his eyebrows with surprise.  
“So what happens now?” He asked as Ethan shrugged his shoulders.  
“I guess we have to make it out of here first” 

As the sisters pulled away from each other that’s when Bella noticed that Marcus was not here and there was still no sign of Marcus entering the room.  
“W-where’s Marcus?!”

.........

When Marcus entered the room as he split off from everyone, straight away the door he came through now slammed shut and darkness filled the room. “Fuck” he muttered as he tried to open the door that was now locked. Whatever was waiting for him, there was no escape.

He felt his breath caught in his throat as he was filled with the darkness all over again. “Marcus.....Marcus” a voice whispered as he felt his heart now pounding his his chest. All over again, the same voice that filled his ears that night in his bedroom. 

“Missed me Marcus?” He voice taunted before the next second a sharp claw grabbed his ankle and pulled him onto the floor causing him to scream out. Trying to find something to grip onto but it was too dark to see.  
“Come and float with us Marcus, we all float down here” Said the voice as more claws appeared to grab at him. 

The claws began to dig in his scars causing him to scream and cry out in pain, body shaking in an attempt to get the claws off him as he slammed his head back against the floor as he cried out. It was like that night all over again, the fear and how weak and vulnerable he felt.  
“Gonna cry for mommy Marcus?” The all too familiar voice teased...the clown was teasing him again, making him too scared to fight back. This is what IT wants, It wants to feed from his fear...if he allows it he may never be free or this will be how his miserable life ends. That’s when he remembered the glass from the broken mirror he put in his pocket.

“No!” He said as his hands quickly rushed to his pocket.  
“And why is that?” He voice chuckled  
“Because I can defend myself!” He called out before he brought the glass down onto one of the clawed hands grabbing for him. Blood pooled out and screeches were heard as he pulled the glass out and stabbed it into the other hand grabbing him.

His hand was in agony and profusely bleeding as the glass in his hand cut at him but he needed to ignore the pain, because the only thing that mattered right now was surviving this hell hole. The hands let go of his ankles as Marcus quickly got up.

The hands were now gone but he knew that he wasn’t alone in the room, he knew he hasn’t got away that easily. He can only hear his own breathing as he held the glass in his hand, the feel of warmth and wetness from his blood that was dripping down his hand and onto the floor.

“Come on” he muttered, gritting his teeth as he waited for its next move. He grew impatient as he waited, silence filling the room before he was yelling at the top of his lungs “COME ON!”   
He heard the clown’s laugh and he clenched his free fist tighter before taking a step forward.  
“Feeling brave Marcus?” Asked a voice hidden in the shadows.  
“Maybe” he muttered in response as he took another step.   
The clown voice let out a dark chuckle, Marcus could hear the tap of its claws touching the walls of the room. 

As Marcus took another step that’s when he paused, emerging from the dark was him? His younger self...his pj’s covered in blood from where he was grabbed and clawed at that night, tears down his face and the sound of little sniffles. Looking at his younger self he could see how vulnerable he really looked all those years ago. “It hurts” his younger self whimpered, clutching onto his arm.  
“W-why didn’t mom help us?” He cried as he stepped closer to Marcus, He felt this pain...like his own heart had been ripped out at the sight of his younger self, all of those memories coming back to him. In a way he knows his mom probably never heard him, the clown making his mom deaf to the sounds of his bedroom and what was going on...in a way he never forgave his mom for it, for not running to help him, to protect him.

“It’s our fault isn’t it?...because we didn’t believe Bells” he whispered as Marcus shook his head.  
“No...no it’s not” he whispered when suddenly his younger self grew, transforming.  
“What about this?” Voice grew deeper, to how it is now.

There stood himself, blood at the side of his head, cuts all over his face and bits of broken glass. He was wearing the outfit he wore the night he-  
“Was this our fault?” His other self said.  
“We killed Brad...we’re murders” he continued as Marcus shook his head.

“No” he breathed before taking a step closer to his other self.  
“We killed Brad because we wanted to indulge, we wanted to forget because we are cowards!” He spat as Marcus clenched his fist.  
“Maybe we were cowards because we wanted forget but not anymore” he said causing his other self to chuckle.

“Try telling April that, she almost died because of us, we almost killed her”   
“No we didn’t....we weren’t the ones driving, we can’t continue to blame ourselves for that crash anymore” Marcus whispered, voice breaking a little at the last part.  
“We’re cowards and Murders Marcus”   
Marcus shook his head again, hand clenching tighter.  
“Brad died because he was stupid enough to drink drive, what we did all those years ago was stupid and selfish too but we didn’t kill him” Said Marcus, his voice breaking a little...he needed to accept that it wasn’t him that caused this, Marcus was not behind the wheel, Brad was.

“People like us deserve to float, accept it and float with us Marcus” his other self said, voice so monotone, to hear it from himself, his own voice was actually terrifying. His hand now clenched around the glass, wincing at the sharp pain and more blood beginning to pool down onto the floor as he watched his other self turn into some sort of dark shadow.

As the dark shadow reached to grab him Marcus yelled out, raising his hand up and plunging the big piece of glass into the monster. There was a pause as the monster groaned.  
“I’m done” Started Marcus   
“The nightmares, the terror, the pain and guilt I have lived with for all these years, I’m done” he continued as he watched the dark, shadowed monster beginning to crumble a little, glass still wedged into its chest.  
“You have no power over me anymore” he lifted his foot up and kicked it over, a loud, pain filled moan from the monster as it fell over and turned into dust.

Was it over? He thought to himself.  
“Marcus!” He heard Bella call out as he looked at the door that was still in the darkness, making his way over to the door that was still locked he began to kick it down. Raising his foot up and hitting the door as hard as he could. 

It took three or four attempts before the door broke open and he was collapsing into Bella’s arms. He was most likely getting his blood all over her as he gripped onto her but it didn’t matter. “Hey you’re okay” she whispered as Marcus gasped before his hand was reaching towards the back on her head and his lips were touching her cheek. As he pulled away it was returned by Bella’s lips on his cheek whispering a “I think we did it” to his cheek as she pulled away.

Everyone else was crowded around, Molly’s hand on Bella’s shoulder, Seb and Ethan hugging in relief, gripping tight of each other while Marcus stayed in Bella’s arms.  
“Bells and Mucus did it” Muttered Marcus with a tired smirk.  
“Bells and Mucus did it” repeated Bella, laughing a little, voice breathless. 

All the relief and feeling of freedom washed away as a deep rumble filled the house, it wasn’t just a rumble....the place was coming down.


	11. Chapter Eleven - Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the group run out of the house another six come following out after, they all talk about what’s happened and their plans.
> 
> Warning - Chapter contains themes of abuse in Ethan’s parts and it gets a little smutty towards the end (nothing explicit)

“The place is coming down” Said Ethan, panic in his voice as they felt the place now shaking, parts falling down from the ceiling. “Shit!” Yelled out Seb as they all got up in a panic and began to run for the door, down the corridor and down the stairs. In a panic everyone was yelling out as they ran as fast as they could down the stairs and out the house, a lot of ‘shits’ yelled out by the group as they ran as fast as they could, avoiding parts that’s were breaking apart and coming down until they were far away from the house, on the other side of the road. 

Ethan held onto Bella tightly, keeping her close and the others panted and gasped for breath, standing close by together as they watched the house now beginning to crumble apart. Seb had his hands on his knees, catching his breath as the others stood around.

As Marcus took a step forward he noticed something, eyes narrowing as he tried to make out something, he was sure he could hear other voices shouting out mixed with the sound of the loud rumble, it was hard to tell because the rumbling and crashing of the house was so loud.   
“Is there other people in there?” He muttered.  
“What?” Said Bella as they all looked up towards the direction of the house. As they did out came six people running out the house and out the yard, joining them on the road the group were currently standing on.  
“Eddie!” One of them yelled out as he grabbed some guy’s arm who must be Eddie as they ran out the house, standing next to them. All of them now watching as the house came crashing down.

All panting for breath and a few ‘holy shits’ spoken between both groups before both groups turned to look at each other with confusion on their faces. Something about this felt awkward, who were these guys?

“I’m sorry but were you guys just in there?” Asked the girl of the group, covered in what looked like blood as she looked at how roughed up they looked too.  
“Um yeah...” breathed Bella in response as the other group looked at each other, eyes wide with surprise. Who where these guys?and where they hell were they in the house?

As Molly looked at the group that’s when she noticed a familiar face...no fucking way.  
“Is this why you cancelled on me? To kill a fucking child eating clown?!” Spoke up Molly causing all heads to turn to look at her with surprise “that’s fucking Richie Tozier!” She exclaimed as she stepped forward and pointed at Richie who was looking incredibly confused.  
“Oh I’m Molly Morgan, the radio host you cancelled on!” She said as she took a step forward, holding her hand out for Richie to shake.

“Yeah Hi...um, sorry about that” he muttered with a nervous chuckle as he accepted her handshake.  
“I’m sorry I hope we don’t sound rude but who are you guys? And why were you here?” Asked the girl.

“Sorry um...I’m Bella...Bella Morgan I was actually in some of Richie’s classes now that I remember” started Bella.  
“Bella?” Said another voice standing next to Richie and that’s when she recognised the face, a very familiar face of her childhood “Eddie?!” So her first boyfriend was here.  
“Yeah um...it’s been a while” he breathed as he placed his hands on his hips.  
“Wow Eddie your play date is here”  
“Shut up Richie!” He snapped back.  
“I’m Ethan Davis”  
“Sebastian Miller”  
“Marcus Hayes”   
“I remember you guys! Yeah that’s right we helped Marcus when he got into that fight with Bowers!” Exclaimed Eddie as he looked at Bev and Richie who were also there.

“Oh shit sorry yeah I’m Beverly, that’s Richie and Eddie”  
“I’m Ben Hanscom”  
“Mike Hanlon”  
“Bill Denbrough”   
They all gave awkward hellos and I remember yous before Richie spoke up again “as nice as this trip down memory lane is, how about we get the fuck out of here?” He suggested as everyone looked back at the now big pile of rubble before nodding in agreement.

............

The Losers had headed to the Quarry while the others headed back to the hotel to clean up and change into something else. If there were actually any staff working in this hotel they imagine there would be some disapproving looks as they entered covered in blood, dirt and what other shit was in that house. They all split off as they went to change out of their clothes into something clean.

Seb spent an awful long amount of time in the shower, cleaning the blood and bits of flesh off his body as he tried to shake away the disgusting feeling he felt. Molly was the same as she cleaned up and changed into new clothes. Bella had Marcus’ blood on her so she thought it was best to clean up and change into something else, dumbass got his blood in her hair but she didn’t care, all that mattered to her was that they all made it out alive. Marcus washed and changed and sat with the first aid box, butterfly stitching his hand up, it had stopped bleeding but the cut looked really fucking deep.

“Shit” he muttered to himself, Bells is a nurse right? Maybe she could take a look. He decided to get up and head to her room, knocking on the door with his uninjured hand.  
“Bells! Could you look at my hand please?!” He called out before he heard the sound of her soft footsteps heading to the door.  
As she opened the door he smiled, holding his hand out as her eyes widened.  
“Jesus!” She muttered before stepping aside for him to come in.

“Sit on the bed” she muttered before going to find the first aid box in the room and opening it up. “Did you seriously try to butterfly stitch that?” She said as she looked back at the failed attempt on his hand as she put some rubber gloves on and reached for the needle and thread in the box. 

“Will this hurt?” He asked  
“You want the truth?” She said with a smirk as she thread the thread through the hole of the needle.  
“Yeah but not as much as whatever happened to cause that” she said before grabbing a chair to pull up in front of him.

“So what did you do back there?” She asked as the brought the needle to his hand.  
“I, Ah! Stabbed the thing with a huge piece of broken glass” he explained, yelling a little at the pain as he watched the needle enter his hand.  
“Look up at me, it will hurt more if you watch it dumbass...you clenched your hand around it?” She asked as Marcus moved his eyes to look at Bella’s concentrated face instead.  
“Something like that” He gritted through his teeth  
“I can tell, your fingers are cut too but lucky for you it’s only the palm of your hand that needs stitching, I’ll wrap your hand up when I’m done” she explained before it went quiet again as she continued on with her work.

He watched as she opened her mouth to say something before closing it again.  
“What?” He said as he raised his eyebrows up.  
“Ethan....back in the house he told me he loves me....that he has since he was twelve” she explained as Marcus smirked.  
“Well that was fucking obvious, do you want me to pretend I’m surprised?” Teased Marcus before Bella pressed the needle a little harder into his hand causing him to yell out.  
“Ah! Okay, okay I’m sorry! So what happens now?” He asked as Bella sighed.  
“I...I don’t know, the feelings for him have always been there too but...I was too stupid to realise what those feelings where” she said as she continued on with the last stitch on his hand.

“You spoken to him since being back here?” He asked as Bella cut the remaining thread away, shaking her head. That’s when she got up to pull out the bandages to wrap his hand up.  
“You could....you could ask him to spend the night in your room” suggested Marcus with a smirk causing Bella to look up at him eyes wide.  
“Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?” She asked as Marcus’ smirk widened.  
“Stop it” she muttered as she slapped his arm.  
“What? He may take you by surprise! For all you know Ethan could be some sort of Sex God!” He teased as Bella slapped his arm again.  
“Enough! That’s one thing I have not missed about you, your teasing!” She said as Marcus now raised his hands up in surrender.  
“Sorry! Maybe invite him up anyway, even if it’s just to talk. Most likely everyone will be leaving Derry tomorrow...make your decision tonight, it’s obvious what Ethan’s choice is”

..............

Ethan didn’t notice how bad the bruises on his neck where until he caught sight of it in the mirror as he got dressed after his shower. 

It was his “dad” that did this, his dad never hurt him as a child...well not physically anyway but it really began to hit him...his dad was dead, had been for two years and made no attempt to reach out to him, no attempt to make amends...no attempt to be his dad when he was already so lonely in the word. 

His hands clenched the sink as his lip began to tremble. Whimpers and gasps left him as his body now shook with sobs, head bowing down as his hands clenched the sink tighter as he cried. 

He didn’t realise Seb and Molly had entered his room until he felt two pair of hands and two bodies press against him. As Ethan opened his eyes, through tear filled vision he saw them both through the mirror, holding him with comforting and reassuring looks on their faces. 

“Sorry...I don’t know what came over me” he groaned as he eventually pulled away, rubbing the dried tears on his face.  
“It’s okay” Said Molly  
“Everything you’ve been feeling and locked up has come to the surface right?” Said Seb as Ethan nodded his head.  
“Yeah something like that” he muttered as he wiped his eyes again.

“You’re not alone, not back then and now now...I always saw you and honestly Ethan, I really struggled to find friends until you came along and even now...I think people I met just didn’t live up to my standard because of you” Explained Seb with a smirk at the end causing Ethan to chuckle a little.

“You mean everything to me Ethan, I’m not gonna lose that again, you hear me?!” He exclaimed, putting his hand on Ethan’s shoulder as Ethan nodded his head.  
“Loud and clear” whispered Ethan as he put his hand on top of Seb’s.  
“Well aren’t you two cute” cooed Molly as she looked at the two with a smile.

That’s when Seb paused for a moment before his eyebrows raised and he tilted his head a little with surprise. “No way...do you remember?” Whispered Seb as Ethan narrowed his eyes at him.  
“Remember what?”  
“A certain smooch between us” he said causing Ethan’s eyes to widen with surprise and Molly too.  
“Wait a minute are you?” Asked Molly, question drifting off as she pointed at Ethan who’s cheeks were now pink.

“No! I’m not! He is though” chuckled Ethan as he pointed at Seb.  
“So what’s this about a smooch?”   
“Well back then when we were seventeen I didn’t want Ethan to feel like no one cared about him...so me being the best friend I am! Offered to be his first kiss” Explained Seb causing Molly to grin with amusement.

“Well aren’t you sweet” she chuckled as she looked at Ethan who looked a little flustered.  
“Yeah...I forgot that happened” he nervously chuckled, now rubbing the back of his head.

They spent a while talking, Seb and Ethan telling Molly about the things they got up to as kids before Molly told them a few things about her and Bella growing up. For the first time in a long time Ethan felt this relief, this happiness where he did not feel like a shadow, a background to people’s conversations. Seeing Seb again felt like they never drifted apart.

All three heads looked up as there was a knock on the door, the door opening to reveal Marcus as he peaked his head through the door “oh hey, there you are! Me and Bella have seen the others out the front so we’re going to head down to the lobby” Explained Marcus.  
“Okay, we’ll be down” Said Seb before giving a smile as Marcus left, shutting the door behind him.

“Take your time” Said Seb, patting Ethan’s back before leaving the room. As Seb left Molly turned to face him “before what happened just now in the bathroom and Seb following me in I was hoping to speak to you?” She said causing Ethan’s nerves to flare up, he thinks he has an idea of what she wants to speak to him about.

“I don’t know what was said between you and Bella back there but I think I have an idea...I mean is obvious the way you where when I told you I’m related to her and the entire time here, how protective you’ve been over my sister...I just...what I’m saying is Bella has dated a lot of guys and they’ve never worked out...but they way she has been with you...I’ve never seen her like that with any guy, at first when I saw you both at the cafe I thought she came to Derry for you and not the child killing clown” she explained before chuckling at the last part. 

“What I’m saying is that I think there’s something special about you Ethan and something tells me that I’ll be seeing a lot more of you” she smirked causing Ethan’s heart to beat a little faster at what she was hinting at.   
“I’ll see you around Ethan”  
“You too Molly”

........

Now clean from what had happened a few hours ago back at the house, they all sat in the lobby in silence. What was there to say? What could they say? There was tension in the room, especially between Ethan and Bella but right now just didn’t feel like the right time to talk about it, they needed to be alone.

All heads looked up as they saw the Losers enter the hotel, clothes looking damp and hair looking wet, again they could imagine the disapproval of the staff if they were to see them walk in like this “There’s a lot we need to talk about, we’ll be with you in a sec” said Mike as all of them headed up the stairs to their rooms to get changed into something else.

About twenty minutes later they all came down the stairs in new clothes before they all found somewhere to sit. “Were you all still living in Derry or did you just come back here?” Asked Bill, breaking the tension in the room.  
“No they can’t have stayed because I remember Bella moving away” said Eddie as he pointed at her.  
“I did move away but..I saw on the news about the couple that were found dead and I just...had this weird urge to come back here and then my sister followed me” Explained Bella before pointing at Molly.  
“Same with the rest of you?” Asked Bill  
“Not entirely...I got a phone call from the residents home telling me my dad was dying and that he wanted to see me, turns out it was a trap to get me here” Explained Ethan as leaned forward and rubbed his hands together.  
“I got a letter, I’m a PI so I was made to believe that the letter was from a client in Derry just like Ethan, it was bait” joined in Seb before Marcus was the last to speak.  
“I heard about the same couple but on the radio and like Bella I...I just had this feeling telling me to go back there” he muttered as he looked down.

“Mike called all of us because he stayed behind while we all left...but I don’t understand, Pennywise brought you all back here?” Asked Ben as he had a confused look on his face.  
“Ah so the fucker has a name?!” Scoffed Seb as Richie looked at everyone in the room that’s when something began to click in his mind.  
“Wait a minute...was this fucker planning a buffet with us all or some shit?! There’s eleven of us here!” Exclaimed Richie as he quickly counted everyone in the room.  
“So who was the starter and who was the main?”  
“Beep Beep Richie” Muttered Bev.

“So what were you guys doing in the house?” Asked Eddie  
“Confronting our fears, we hoped wherever Pennywise was that we gave it some sort of weakness...we don’t know what went down with you guys but we hope that we never have to see it again” Muttered Marcus as he looked at the others.  
“IT’s dead...we killed IT...for definite this time” Responded Mike.  
“You sure?” Asked Marcus  
“We pulled out its heart and that’s when the place came crashing down” joined in Bill.

Marcus let out a sigh of relief, it’s over, it’s really over. It may not stop the nightmares but now he knew the cause of it, he battled against the cause of it...he’s finally free.

Once the atmosphere had settled down and they were all sure it was over, they all shared a drink to celebrate, Marcus sticking with an orange juice while the rest all had a drink of something a lot stronger because they all needed it. Clinking their glasses together with a “fuck clowns” before drinking to celebrate their freedom 

They all split off at one point, some heading to their rooms while some stayed in the lobby. Bella was currently out on the back porch of the hotel, staring out at the night sky, a little lost in her thoughts. 

“Hi” Muttered as voice, as she looked up she saw Eddie at the door with a soft smile on his face.   
“Hey” She said with a smile as he joined her at the small table on the porch, sitting down on the empty chair.  
“Do I ask what happened to your cheek?” She asked as she looked at the bandage stuck on the side of his face.  
“Bowers” He responded with a sigh, she remembers that psycho, last she heard about him he was arrested for the murder of his dad and the missing children of Derry along with his other friends...it was probably best not to ask anymore questions about the topic.

“We’re not gonna have more awkward silences are we?” She teased.  
“Please don’t make the awkward” smirked Eddie causing Bella to chuckle.  
“God do you remember those play dates?!” She exclaimed.  
“Very clearly” he sighed as he leaned back in his chair “I remember my mom would make me wear all these stupid, fancy clothes” he chuckled as Bella remembered his little colourful outfits “I remember the little colourful bow ties” she chuckled before leaning forward and gently tapping his chest.  
“Ugh don’t remind me!” He Exclaimed as he rolled his eyes.   
“How is your mom?”   
“Um...she passed a few years ago”   
“Oh god I’m so sorry” she muttered as Eddie shook his head “it’s okay...how’s your family?” He asked.

“They’re okay I guess, mom and dad are still together and I have a little sister”  
“She looks like you” he said with a smirk.  
“She’s a bit more talk than me though” she said as she crossed her arms.  
“I know, I’ve heard her on the radio and she’s been giving Richie an earful about how she wants to reschedule their interview he cancelled” he chuckled, she remembers how clearly pissed Molly was about Richie cancelling on her. As the laughter died down they both looked out at dark view or Derry, the lights of the carnival in the distance, it was silent between the two but it didn’t feel like the uncomfortable silences from all those years ago.

“So...what do you do?” Started Bella as she broke the silence.  
“I’m a risk analyst” he said as Bella nodded her head.  
“I know...Richie has already told me how boring my job is” he muttered before Bella shook her head.  
“No it’s not that I just...I just thought you would have went into a medical profession like me that’s all” she said.  
“You’re a Doctor?”  
“A nurse but I’m about to start training soon to go up a little higher in the medical profession” she explained.  
“I thought about it at one point but...I don’t know, well it’s too late to change now”  
“No it’s not....you could come to the hospital I work at if you want, we take on people all the time to train” she suggested as Eddie raised his eyebrows at her.  
“You serious?”  
“Yeah, why not? We’re always happy to take on new people and you already have a lot of medical knowledge, we can help educate and train you” explained Bella as Eddie now looked a little uneasy.  
“I..I don’t know, I thought about it but I...I guess I kind of developed this fear for hospitals because my mom would always take me there, always saying that I was sick or that I had an illness, I guess always dreaded it you know?” Explained Eddie as Bella gave a sad look as she nodded her head. She remembered how Sonia used to be, the amount of times she was putting Eddie in the car to take him to hospital because he was “sick”.

“I’m sorry Eddie I didn’t think I-“  
“No don’t be sorry! I...I have thought about it, I have it’s just...I don’t know if I could do it because of my experiences” he sighed as Bella gave a sad smile.  
“What if I gave you my details anyway? So then the option is always there if you want to take it” she suggested as Eddie nodded his head and gave a quiet okay.

That’s when Bella noticed the ring around Eddie’s finger as he played with it a little.  
“You married?” She asked   
“Yeah I...I don’t know, since coming back here I’ve been feeling all these things again...all these doubts” He Responded   
“Same here, I started feeling all these feeling that I felt all those years ago but I didn’t realise what they were until tonight...I guess me almost getting squashed to death opened my eyes to the one who’s always been there for me but I was too blind to see” she explained as she looked down at her hands.

“Ethan?” He asked causing her to look up with surprise.  
“H-how?”   
“I saw how he was holding you outside the house and the way he’s been looking at you all night...now that I think about it he’s always been as obvious as Ben was with Bev” he asked as Bella sighed.  
“You gonna act on it?” He asked.

“I don’t know I...he cared about me for all those years and I was completely oblivious to it...in a way I feel like I don’t deserve him”  
“Don’t be like that, look we almost died and now...maybe now is our chance to change things in our lives that we’re not happy with” Explained Eddie as he looked back down at the ring, in a way it got him thinking about Richie, about all these feeling he had...Richie pushing him out the way of Pennywise back there...the feelings between the two were now so clear, it was so obvious.  
He sighed before sliding the ring off his finger.

“There’s something I need to do” he said before he got up from his seat and turned to look at Bella.  
“Just think about it” he said as he indicated towards Ethan as Bella nodded her head “okay” she whispered.  
“Nice seeing you again” he said as he gave a soft smile  
“You too Eddie” 

..................

Richie was sitting on the front porch of the hotel as he looked out at the front, it was finally over and all he could think about was Eddie and what he saw in the deadlights, he thought he was going to lose him, he thought he was dead. He couldn’t bare to sit back in the lobby with everyone else, looking at Eddie’s smile and laugh knowing that he might not see him again. Tomorrow they’ll all be going their separate ways and it hurt, sure they will all keep in touch but he won’t be with Eddie. 

“Mind if I join you?” Asked Marcus as he appeared next to him, pulling him out of his thoughts.  
“Be my guest” He responded as Marcus went to sit down next to him, glass of juice in his hand.  
“What a night” Sighed Marcus  
“You got that right”   
“I didn’t think after all these years that I’d finally feel the relief that I do now” Said Marcus as Richie Scoffed 

“Any plans once we leave this shithole?” Asked Marcus as Richie shrugged his shoulders.  
“Maybe start writing some new material, reschedule with Molly because she was pretty pissed about me cancelling...nothing else really, you?” he said as he sighed.  
Marcus shrugged his shoulders “I don’t really know if I’m honest, I keep thinking about all the things in Derry I didn’t know I was a part of, i’m a little stuck about where I go from here” He responed as Richie nodded his head.

“All of these memories keep coming back to me, do you remember the whole thing with me and Bowers?!”   
“Yeah how could I forget? The first idiot to fight Henry fucking Bowers”  
“Yeah that’s the one! If I’m honest I think I developed a little crush on you back then” said Marcus causing Richie to look back at him with surprised and amused look on his face “really?!”  
“Oh totally, your face all up in mine as you put that ice over my eye and then a few years down the line I said to my girlfriend at the time that you’d be my free pass” he explained, chuckling as Richie’s eyes widened, muttering a little “Jesus” with amusement.  
“You made me swoon Richie Tozier” he smirked  
“Look I’m flattered an all but I-“  
“You have feelings for someone else?” Asked Marcus causing Richie to furrow his eyebrows together.

“Correct me if I’m wrong but...do you remember when Bella and Eddie were dating?”  
“How could I forget” he muttered before taking a sip of the beer in his hand.  
“I remember you had this look of jealousy and almost heartbreak on your face, you even wanted to team up with me to break them up I...l guess the only way I could compare it was the same look of heartbreak Ethan had about them....I guess what I’m trying to say is...you have feelings for Eddie?” Suggested Marcus and Richie’s eyes widened as Marcus said it.

“If that’s the case it’s okay” he said as Richie remained silent. He sighed , putting the beer bottle down on the step before he buried his face in his hands “I thought he was going to die tonight...I thought he was dead” he started as he lifted his head back up.  
“I guess I saw some sort of vision it’s a little hard to explain but it felt so real and I just wanted to die down there with him and the moment I snapped out of it I didn’t even let him speak I just pushed him out the way because I knew what was coming next if I didn’t” explained Richie, a lump forming in his throat as he felt himself tearing up. Eddie nearly died, he had experienced it first hand, my god, the pain and heart break it had given him in that moment...now there’s a possibility he won’t see him again. 

“From my experience....if you love someone, like really love someone...you take them with both of your hands, hold them tightly and never let go...I know how painful it is to have someone you love walk away, believe me....take the chance with him Richie because if you don’t you’ll regret it” Said Marcus as Richie turned to look at him with a sad look in his eyes. 

In a way he’s terrified of Eddie not feeling the same way because Eddie not wanting to even be his friend anymore because of this would hurt just as bad. There was a moment in the cave, after he pushed him out the way of the claw there was a moment...it felt like nothing else was going on around him as they looked into each other’s eyes, he was almost sure that Eddie was about to reach his hand up to his cheek before they had been snapped back to reality of what was going on around them. 

He was stuck in a dilemma “well what about you? Maybe it’s not too late to fix whatever happened between you and this person” suggested Richie as he turned to look at Marcus. Marcus looked at him with surprise before looking down at his hands “Yeah...maybe” he muttered. He missed April, he really did...but what if she had moved on, what if she had no interest in him, he can’t say he’d blame her for feeling that way, he put her through hell. It broke his heart seeing her walking away and he could see the pain in her eyes as she did too...but he never stopped loving her.

.........

Ethan had made his way behind the bar, fixing himself as drink before he felt the presence of someone behind him, climbing onto one of the stools. “Any chance you could pour me one?” Asked a voice, as Ethan turned around he saw that it was Ben sitting at the bar. He was honestly surprised when he saw Ben, he looked so....different from what he remembered, he could see it was still the same face but god he looked different, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t think he was attractive. 

“Sure” He said as he grabbed another glass and poured Ben a drink, gently pushing it over to him.  
Both taking their drinks and swallowing it down in one gulp.  
“How’s your neck?” He asked as his eyes scanned the bruises. Ethan gritted his teeth at the strength of the drink as he swallowed it down before shrugging his shoulders “it hurts a little but I’ll be okay” he said before going to pour another glass, offering Ben another refill.

“Feels strange being here right?” Asked Ben as he tipped his glass towards Ethan as he filled the glass up again.  
“Yeah” he breathed before they both gulped their drinks down again.  
“Any plans for tomorrow?” Asked Ethan.  
“I um...me and Bev are talking things out...a lot of things went down back there” he muttered nervously as his hands cradled the glass.   
“Yeah...Same” Responded Ethan as he looked down at his drink.  
“Bella?” Asked Ben causing Ethan to look up with surprise.  
“The drawing” he smirked as he looked at Ethan’s surprised face, that’s right, Ben was the one to try and comfort Ethan when Bowers destroyed all of his drawings, he remembers Ben instead of questioning why there was a drawing of Bella Morgan in his notebook he complimented how much it looked like her instead, of course he put two and two together about his feelings for Bella. He was going through the exact same thing that Ethan did all these years, anyone could see that he is deeply in love with Beverly Marsh, just like he is with Bella.

“You confess your feelings in a life and death situation too?” Asked Ben with an amused tone causing Ethan to smirk.  
“Something like that” he said as they both chuckled.

“Room for one more?!” Called out Seb as he came over to the bar and sat down next to Ben.  
“You look great by the way, new kid” exclaimed Seb as he looked at Ben.  
“Thanks” nervously chuckled Ben in response also remembering the nickname he got from everyone in school.

Ethan grabbed another glass, pouring a drink and passing it to Seb. “Have you spoke to her?” Asked Ben as Ethan shook his head “not since coming back here” he responded as he poured himself another glass.

“Let me guess, Bella?” Asked Seb as Ben nodded his head.  
“Go and talk to her, you’ve done the hard part” suggested Ben as Seb pointed at Ben in agreement.  
“He’s right, she knows how you feel and if she’s not interested in the kind caring person you are then I’ll sweep you up myself!” Exclaimed Seb as they all began to laugh, Ethan rolling his eyes, he’s always appreciated how Seb has always hyped him up, even as kids.

Once the laughter had died down that’s when he noticed someone enter the room...Bella.  
“Hey” She said softly as they all turned to look at her.  
“H-hi” breathed Ethan in response as Bella stayed by the door.  
“I was just wondering, is there anyway you could sleep in my room tonight? I um...I don’t want to be alone” she said and Ethan felt like his heart was beating out of his chest.

“Y-Yeah! Yeah I can stay” he breathed, most likely nerves coming through in his voice as Bella softly smiled.  
“I’ll be in my room” she said softly before leaving the room. Ben and Seb turning to look at Ethan with eyebrows raised and smirks on their faces.  
“I’ve got some things to do, see ya around Ethan” said Ben with a smirk as he climbed off the bar stool and left the room leaving just Ethan and Seb in the room.

“What?” Said Ethan as the grin widened on Seb’s face.  
“My best buddy is finally getting laid, how do you feel?”   
“What?! Who’s to say we’re going to have sex” said Ethan, whispering the last part in fear that Bella might hear.  
“Dude! She just asked you to spend the night in her room! She is hinting that something is going to go down!” He continued, the grin never leaving his face.

“I mean yeah she’s asked me to stay in her room but it could be just to talk and because she doesn’t want to be alone after what happened” suggested Ethan as Seb shrugged his shoulders.  
“Maybe but I doubt it, the way she’s been looking at you since we’ve come back here, what? Are you that innocent Ethan?” He teased as Ethan scoffed, shaking his head. 

“Mark my words Ethan, it’s happening!” 

.........

When Ethan made his way upstairs to Bella’s room he didn’t really know what to expect, she wanted him to spent the night and something told him it was going to be a long night about them talking about things and what had happened back at the house. What Seb had been saying had been playing in his mind too and with the look on Ben’s face he was thinking the same as Seb, goddamn it. 

As he got closer to her door he felt like his heart was now pounding in his chest, he wasn’t this nervous before with her...maybe it’s because she finally knows how he feels about her and Seb before now making him even more nervous.

Hesitantly he knocked on her door, he nervously swallowed as listened to the sound of soft footsteps making their way to the door. As she answered the door Bella looked up at him with a nervous smile “hey” she whispered.  
“Hi” he whispered back as she stepped aside for him to come in.   
The room was dark with nothing but a lamp at the bedside illuminating the room, giving it a soft glow as he entered the room, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

Bella shut the door, locking it before making her way over to her bed, Ethan didn’t notice until now but she was wearing nothing but a shirt and a pair of panties causing Ethan to nervously swallow. Mentally shaking the thoughts out of his head Ethan walked over as he joined her to sit down on the bed. “You okay?” He asked her as she looked up at him.  
“Yeah it’s just...what happened back there is a lot to take in” she said as she let out a nervous laugh.  
“I guess it is” he whispered, they almost died back there, he was almost choked to death by his ‘dad’ and Bella almost died too...he confessed his love for her but now he’s stuck as to where that leaves them both. Does she feel the same? Or is she going to try and let him down gently?

“What happened back there?” She asked as her fingers gently reached to touch the bruises on his neck. Ethan nervously swallowed as he felt her fingers delicately touch his skin “Pennywise transformed into my dad and attacked me...all while I could hear you screaming in the other room” he explained, the name of the clown sounding strange on his tongue as he said it.  
He watched as Bella went to open her mouth to say something before closing it again. Her eyes scanned the bruises on his neck again before she swallowed “d-did he ever hurt you? Your dad?” She asked, voice breaking a little as she asked.

Ethan nervously licked his lips “not physically...but mentally and emotionally...I guess he did” he whispered at the last part as he turned away from her eyes that now filled with sadness. He turned away from his eyes as he looked down at his lap, hands clenching a little as they rested on his knees. He didn’t want to talk about all that shit that happened, he just wanted to forget.

As he turned back to look at her he noticed how tired she looked. Her eyes closing a little as she was close to resting her head on his shoulder if she wanted to. His fingers gently reached out to brush some strands of hair out of her face “let’s get some sleep” he whispered.  
“You’re staying right?”  
“If you want me to” he said in response  
“Please”  
“Okay” he whispered as he softly smiled at her before he got off the bed so that she could get under the covers. He leaned over her, tucking her smaller frame into the covers before he sat down at her side. He reached down to brush his fingers through her hair again as she looked up at him. What he wasn’t expecting was for Bella to reach her hand up to caress his face, almost jumping at little at the touch, her soft delicate hand against the stubble of his jaw and side of his face as his heart now pounded in his chest.

“It’s always been you, it should have always been you” She whispered, her thumb gently brushing across his cheek as he felt like his heart was now in his throat.  
“You where always there to protect me” she whispered. Ethan couldn’t explain it but he felt like he could feel himself tearing up, his vision blurring a little as tears threatened to leave. 

He ignored the tears that were building up in his eyes as he leaned down to press his lips softly to her head. The kiss soft before he moved to pull away, Bella’s head pushed up a little, following him as her face was inches close to his. Her soft brown eyes looking into his teary ones, a soft gasp leaving him as her lips touched his.

The kiss soft and lingering as Bella gently pulled away before nervously looking up at him. Ethan nervously licked his lips as he looked into her eyes. Bella kissed him? She kissed him, he wasn’t dreaming right? His hand no trembling a little as he reached up to caress her soft face before he pulled her in for another kiss. 

He was kissing Bella, Bella was kissing him. It felt like the feeling and the realisation of what was happening was overwhelming him, almost felt like he was drowning. The kiss deepened and Ethan’s fingers traveled into Bella’s soft brown hair, fingers gripping a little causing a soft gasp from Bella against his lips, he caused that sound from her. Her hands began to clutch Ethan’s shirt, beginning to pull at it.

Pulling away from the kiss and Ethan’s fingers leaving her hair, Bella gripped his shirt and pulled it off over his head, dropping it to the floor before Bella’s lips were on his neck. Her lips so soft and delicate against the bruised skin causing a shuddering breath to leave his lips.  
Her fingers so delicate as they traveled up his arms, before one hand traveled up to his cheek before her lips were back on his again. Ethan’s hand reaching up to her cheek again as the other hand now snaked around her waist and pulled her close. The touch he has been so deprived of his whole life and it was Bella, the girl he has been in love with his whole life, even if he forgot about her for almost twenty seven years he knew she was out there. 

As they pulled away from the kiss, Bella leaned back into the bed before Ethan followed, towering over her. She scanned his body as she was too in the moment when she removed his shirt that she didn’t notice...Ethan has abs, he was looking back at her, lips red from the kissing and soft breaths leaving his lips. Bella could feel her cheeks burning up as her eyes scanned the body of the man above her, she wasn’t expecting to see abs underneath sweet Ethan Davis.

He nervously licked his lips as he could see her eyes scanning his body before he was leaning down to kiss her again, body pressing against her and one hand now gripping her thigh causing Bella to softly gasp at the feel of him pressing against her and his fingers pressing into the soft skin of her thigh. She was liking this over side to Ethan, it was still sweet, gentle Ethan but there was this passion in him as he kissed her, as he gripped her thigh, as he pressed against her. 

Her fingers reaching into his hair and gripping it a little as the kiss deepened before Ethan was pulling away to look into her eyes. “Is...is this okay?” He asked as he looked into her eyes. A smile appeared on her face, of course Ethan would ask her if she was comfortable and if it was okay to touch her. She pulled his closer again before whispering against his lips.

“Yes”


	12. Epilogue Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bella, Ethan and Seb’s epilogue. This chapter is about what they have been up to and a few indications for the future.
> 
> Warning - Mentions Of Attempted suicide (Stan is alive in this chapter)

When Bella woke up the next day, she was welcomed by the shining bright light coming through the curtains. Groaning a little as she wasn’t in the mood to wake up, she wanted to fall back asleep, realising she’s not going to fall back asleep and the tiredness has already left her body, she opened her eyes to see Ethan sat up on the bed, knees up with a notebook on his lap and a pencil in his hand, sketching away.

“Whatya drawing” grumbled Bella causing Ethan to look at her with surprise.   
“Oh um...you wanted a drawing right?” He said as he held his notebook, oh that’s right, Bella had asked Ethan back at the cafe if he could draw something for her. It was really sweet that Ethan didn’t forget.

“You wanna see?” He asked as Bella smiled before sitting up, pulling the blankets up with her to cover her naked chest as she looked at the drawing. Oh wow, he’s talented that’s for sure. It was a drawing of her, fast asleep with the blankets wrapped around her body, hugging the pillow that she lay on. Her hair on the pillow and there were flowers also scattered around the drawing, she can imagine how beautiful it would look with colour added to it.

“I just...I just drew what I saw when I woke up” he muttered with a soft smile as Bella looked at the drawing with amusement “this is amazing Ethan...it’s special too” she said as she looked away from the drawing and turned to look at Ethan. The picture is a reminder of what happened between them, in Ethan’s case it’s a reminder of what he hopes to see everyday when he wakes up. 

“I love you Ethan” she said softly as a smile spread across his face “I love you too” he whispered as he took one of her hands and pressed a kiss to it. This was a new start to the rest of their lives.

Little did they know that Ethan and Bella were actually living it the same city all this time without even realising. Bella moved in with Ethan because his place was much bigger but now the place seemed so full. A place that was so empty and lonely for Ethan had now become this place so full of life now that he had someone to share it with. Although it wasn’t just anyone, it was Bella, Bella Morgan, the girl he fell head over heels for all those years ago. 

She was now here, in his home, no! their home! and they had the rest of their lives together.

The feeling of waking up every morning to her eyes looking back at him. This morning he woke up to an empty bed but he could hear movement in the kitchen, Bella must have an early shift today. As he climbed out of bed and went to the living room there was Bella moving around, in search for things.

“Hey! I let you sleep in because I know you have the day off today” She called out as she continued to look around for things, turning her back to him. Ethan smiled as he walked towards her before wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close, the sounds of her giggles music to his ears as he pressed a kiss to her cheek before his lips began to travel down her neck.

“Ethan” She warned, leaning back a little into his touch.  
“I have work” she breathed, half moan leaving her lips as Ethan smirked against her neck.  
“It’s just work” he whispered as he turned her around to face him.  
“It’s just work” he whispered again to her lips before he was lifting her up, a deep growl in his throat causing Bella to giggle as she wrapped her legs around his waist.

“Okay ten minutes!” She called out in her giggles as Ethan carried her back to the bedroom.

Bella got funny looks that day from her co workers when she arrived late, mostly because Bella is very punctual when it comes to work. It’s not like her to arrive late, a certain Ethan Davis was to blame for that but does she have any regrets?.....definitely not.

During her day at work Bella saw Mrs Flowers again when she entered the hospital for a pain in her hip. The elderly woman that had told her that she would be meeting Mr Right some time soon, how right she was.

“So my dear, has Mr Right entered your life yet?” She asked as she settled into the bed she sat on.  
“He most certainly has Mrs Flowers!” She said with a smirk as she put her rubber gloves on.  
“See I told you I’m right about these things Harold!” Mrs Flowers said as she pointed at her husband.  
“What’s his name?”  
“Ethan, he’s a teacher” she explained.  
“He handsome?”  
“Very Mrs Flowers, he’s actually coming in this afternoon to see me” she explained as she went to inspect the old lady’s hip.  
“Well I’ll be sure to keep an eye out”  
“I’m sure you will Mrs Flowers”

When Ethan did arrive at the hospital, Bella had noticed most of her co workers peeking out from the staff room window watching. Poor Ethan had met with Val at the reception desk, the incredibly flirtatious older woman and she could see his cheeks a little pink and him nervously laughing.

“That’s enough Val you’re making him blush!” Called out Bella as she made her way over to the desk with a smile.  
“So this is mystery man you smile at your phone over?” Smirked Val as Bella held Ethan by the arm and pulled him away.  
“We’ll be on our way” she said as they walked away, arms linking around Ethan’s.

“Sorry about that” she apologised as Ethan nervously laughed.  
“I’m pretty sure she said she wants to get in my pants?” He said causing Bella’s eyes to widen.  
“Well that won’t be happening anytime soon!” She scoffed as she took him around on a tour of the hospital. 

They got a lot of looks from her co coworkers as they finally found out who Bella’s mystery man was, she even came across Mrs Flowers who gave a thumbs up approval in the distance. It was nice experience to have Ethan in the workplace but it was a little of a awkward experience from her co workers although they gave her their approval when she saw them the next day.

............

Bella must admit she was surprised to see a very familiar face from Derry arrive at her work a few days later, alking to Val at reception asking to speak to her. There was Eddie Kaspbrak, standing at the front desk, looking a little awkward which could be for two reasons. One, because he’s talking to incredibly flirtatious Val or two because of his fear of hospitals, most likely a mix of both.

“Eddie? Didn’t expect to see you here!” She said with surprise as she walked over to the desk.  
“Yeah I...I didn’t think I’d be here either” he nervously chuckled before they gave a quick hello.

“Wanna talk somewhere in private?”  
“Yeah, sure” Responded Eddie as he nervously looked around.

Bella and Eddie ended up sitting on a bench outside the hospital, both with a coffee in their hands as they looked out at the car park.  
“So how is everything? Since?” Started Eddie.  
“Yeah I...I decided to give things a go with Ethan, it’s going really well” she explained as Eddie softly smiled.

“Glad to hear it” He Responded.  
“I actually had him here a few days ago for a little tour, Val at the front desk told him she wants to get in his pants” she explained as Eddie started to laugh.  
“She was getting a little touchy with my hands back there” nervously chuckled Eddie. Yeah, sounds like Val alright.

As Bella looked at Eddie nervously clutching his hands around the coffee cup that when she noticed the wedding ring no longer on his finger, she remembers him taking it off back in Derry.  
“What about you?” She asked as Eddie hummed in response.  
“How are things with you?”  
Eddie sighed “I’m divorced” he explained.  
“I’m so sorry” she said before Eddie shook his head.  
“No it’s fine...it just wasn’t right...never has been but it took me so long to realise....but I’m happy, I’m now with someone that makes me happy.........Richie” he confessed and Bella’s eyes widened. Eddie and Richie? Eddie and Richie are together? Actually now that she thinks about it all the daggers that Richie used to give her all those years ago makes sense now.

“What?”  
“Nothing it’s just...I guess it’s obvious now that I think about it, especially the way Richie would give me daggers whenever I was around you...pretty sure he wanted to run me over with his bike” she explained as Eddie chuckled.  
“I’ll be sure to get an apology from him” he said  
“You better” she smirked as her foot playfully tapped his.

That’s when a smile began to form on Eddie’s face.  
“Now that I think about it...this is the most we have even spoken to each other, even as kids we never spoke this much” he explained as Bella scoffed.  
“Even when were were ‘dating’ we hardly said a word to each other” chuckled Bella as they both started to laugh. Oh how they wish they could erase those awkward memories again.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?” She asked as the laughter died down, watching Eddie nervously clutch his coffee cup again, looking back down at it.  
“I never thought I’d ever say this but...you still taking on?” He asked as he turned to look at her.

“I just...I thought about it ever since you mentioned it and I’ve spoken to Richie about it too, I can’t be sure that it’s gonna be easy for me and that it’s the career for me or that I will just forget all the things with my mom or my ex wife the moment I step in there but...maybe I can help people you know? Maybe....it’s something I’m meant to do” Explained Eddie as Bella nodded her head. 

“What if I can see about setting up a trial, we do some introduction things, if it’s not for you then that’s okay but then at least the trial will hopefully help you decide what you want” she explained, shuffling closer as Eddie tapped his cup, thinking about what to do.

He sighed before biting his lip “Okay...okay I can do a trial” he breathed a small smile appearing on his face before Bella smiled back.  
“Let’s go inside and talk”

........

For the first time in a long time Ethan was happy. He no longer thought about his dad and how he made him feel all those years ago, he no longer felt this loneliness inside himself. He was with the girl he loved since he was twelve and everything about it felt like it was meant to be, he knows it’s probably too early to plan ahead but he knows that is the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

He won’t lie and deny that he doesn’t think about Derry, he’s had a few nightmares, Bella too. The only difference is they know it’s over and they have each other to talk about it with because no one else would understand, no one outside their small group and no one outside the losers. All twelve of them have each other to talk about this with, no longer alone in this world. For the first time in his life Ethan has never felt so loved.

Ethan has tried to keep close contact with them all, he’s got close contact with Molly due to her being Bella’s sister and he’s close with Seb again, in a way feeling like that close bond they had all those years ago. He hasn’t heard much of Marcus but he knows that Bella has been talking with him, he’s also been working on finding himself again after everything and he’s been working on new music, he has yet to say it but he’s proud of him.

As he lay in bed one night he couldn’t sleep, he watched Bella peacefully asleep next to him, her features so calm and relaxed as she slept. His fingers gently reached out to brush some strands of her out of her face before he climbed out of bed. 

He’s been thinking about it for some time, was it too soon? He wasn’t sure, all he knows is he’s been feeling these feelings for almost his whole life. Why should he wait longer? He headed to the living room and opened up the laptop at the table as he began to look around online.

Bella had a strange dream, she doesn’t really know if it was a dream because she doesn’t remember any scene playing out but she heard a voice, Marcus’ voice.

“BELLS!” his voice yelled out before Bella was throwing herself forward as she bolted awake, gasping for air. She looked around and noticed Ethan’s side was empty but she could see the light of the living room through the gap of the door.

She groaned as she sat at the end of her bed and reached for her phone. Her phone hovering over Marcus’ contact number, she felt like her heart was pounding in her chest. It was a dream but something felt like he was down her ear, calling out for her. Is he okay? Was her conscious telling her something was wrong?

She pressed call and put the phone by her ear as she waited for him to answer.  
“Bells?” In a way she felt this relief wash over her as she heard his voice.  
“Hey! I haven’t woke you have I?” She asked nervously.  
“No, not at all” he responded.  
“I know it sounds strange but I had some kind of dream...I...I heard your voice, it kind of felt like you were right next to me calling out for me, it probably sounds ridiculous but I just wanted to check up, make sure that everything was fine” she explained and Marcus was silent on the other side of the phone.

“You okay?” She asked as the silence made her anxious.  
“Yeah it’s just...I actually woke up from a bad dream and in my dream I actually called out for you at one point” he explained  
“Weird coincidence right?” She said  
“Yeah! Yeah definitely a weird coincidence!” He said but the way he was talking it sounded like he was hiding something.  
“You sure you’re okay?” She asked.  
“Yeah it’s just...recently I’ve been discovering a lot about my self that I never knew I guess...it’s hard to explain, I could maybe explain it to you at some point next time we meet?”

Ethan must have been at the laptop for a while as hours went by before he found the perfect ring. He looked through others but he kept going back to this pacific ring. He kept imagining it on Bella’s finger and it made his heart swell. He wrote down the details he needed on a piece of paper before he quickly closed down the laptop.

He was really going to ask her? To the start of the rest of their lives

.........................

Seb doesn’t know why he was still in Derry that morning, he should have left the moment he woke up after all the shit he went through. Fuck this place, fuck it all the way to hell he thought as he wondered around town, he doesn’t know why but he just felt this need to take a walk, observe all the places of his childhood. 

He walked past the movie theatre, he never went to start with but then it because a common thing for him and Ethan to go. He remembers one time it being just them two in there, he’s pretty sure it was the day they decided to skip school after Ethan’s heartbreak and his own pain of not being ready after what happened to his cousin that summer. They were alone as the movie played and they decided to throw popcorn at each other in failed attempts to catch it with their mouths, they left that day with bits of popcorn in their hair and a big mess for the cleaners. 

He walked past the kissing bridge at one point during his walk as he remembers the night him and Ethan almost ran away together. They sat at the kissing bridge for a few hours and had a tearful and emotional talk because they just couldn’t bring themselves to leave. He now wonders what life might have been like if him and Ethan did leave that night, would they have still forgotten everything about Derry? 

Speaking of him and Ethan that’s when Seb came across the comic book store, they place that helped him and Ethan break the ice between them. It wasn’t just that with the comic book store, Seb used to go there a lot as a kid. It was just him and his mom so she really wasn’t earning much money, he couldn’t afford luxuries like this unless his mom saved for his birthday or Christmas. 

Although there was this man that owned the store, Mr Blake he remembers the name. Well Mr Blake used to talk to him whenever he entered the store and he would even give Seb comics free of charge because there’s “a rip in the comic so he can’t sell it wink, wink” Seb used to enjoy those moments, it was actually really nice to see that the store was still open.

As he entered the store it was still the same as it looked all those years ago, maybe a slight update to it but no dramatic change. He decided to look around the store and as he did he felt like he could see so clearly the memories of him in here. The image of little Seb wondering around and looking at all his favourite heroes, ‘Daredevil’ was his favourite, just something about a blind guy being able to fight like a badass ninja was so cool to him. 

As he looked around a loud voice called out causing him to jump “is that little Sebastian Miller all grown up in my store?!” Seb turned around and no way...he thought this guy would be dead or some shit, there was Mr Blake right behind the desk.  
“Nice to see you too!” He called out as he made his way over to Mr Blake’s desk.  
“So what brings you here my boy?!”  
Seb shrugged his shoulders “I guess I just felt like going down memory lane” he said with a smirk.  
“You staying in Derry long?” Asked Mr Blake.  
“Oh no! I’m actually leaving this afternoon” he explained as Mr Blake nodded his head.  
“Can’t day I blame ya kid, here before you leave” muttered Mr Blake as he grabbed a cardboard box and placed it down on the desk.

Seb looked at the box hesitantly   
“Well it’s not made out of glass kid open it!” He scoffed as Seb hesitantly opened one of the flaps of the box as he did there lay multiple comics, a lot of them including many issues of Matt Murdock’s story continuing on.  
“W-What’s this?” He asked as Mr Blake smiled.  
“I kind of hoped that you would return one day kid so everytime a new issue came out there would always be one comic that just has ‘a rip in one of the pages’ and you know what people are like with their comics! So I thought I’d put it away” he explained and Seb was speechless, he continued to collect these comics for him?

“I-I can’t take this?”  
“Of course you can!”  
“But I have money to pay for this, I’m earning quite a few bucks for myself you know” smirked Seb  
“Take the damn box before I change my mind” ordered the old man as Seb raised his hands up in surrender.  
“Okay, Okay, jeez I don’t remember you being so demanding” Exclaimed Seb as he picked up the box.  
“And I don’t remember you ever turning down a comic!” Scoffed Mr Blake.

He had said his goodbyes as he left the store before he continued on with his walk, he should really cut it short because fuck, this box is heavy. As he walked past the diner he stopped in his tracks, he remembers running like an idiot face first into the glass door and being scared for his life as he ran away from Pennywise. He remembers his hands shaking as he embarrassingly ordered a glass or water but he remembers the face of someone that would also set his nerves off but keep him calm...Stanley....Stanley Uris.

Seb wasn’t ready to go home, not just yet. Ever since he saw the others, the Losers club as they called themselves Seb had realised someone was missing. The moment he saw the diner he remembered Stan, he remembered him coming in and sliding in the booth with him as they shared an ice cream, He remembers the confusing thoughts filling his head. 

As he returned and grabbed his stuff together as he went to leave he had overheard a conversation Mike was having on the phone in regards to Stan.

How could he forget Stan, his first crush, the fist guy to make him realise his sexuality? Mike knew he was listening and Seb had asked about Stan. It turns out he had attempted suicide after Mike had rang him about coming to Derry, his wife had found him in the bathtub, blood everywhere. Seb wanted to be sick at what he heard, Stan hurt himself? He couldn’t get his head around it.

Seb had begged Mike for the address of the hospital he was at as Stan’s wife Patty had called to give Mike an update on Stan...they all thought he was dead. When Seb had gotten an address from Mike he had threw his stuff in the back and climbed into his car before breaking down in tears. This was Stan, sweet Stan, he didn’t deserve pain or suffering, he didn’t deserve to feel those feelings that drove him to hurt himself and try to end his life. He deserved nothing but happiness and love.

Once he had calmed down he drove to that hospital, he didn’t even stop back at his own place to put his things away or give himself a minute, although the hospital was actually not that far from where he lived now that he thinks about it. He was awkward as hell when he arrived, he didn’t know what he was going to say or even if he would be allowed in. He had bumped into who he assumed was Patty as she asked who he was. It seems Mike must have called her again because as soon as he said his name Patty had given him a sweet smile before allowing him to visit Stan. 

His heart was pounding in his chest, what if Stan doesn’t remember him? It’s not like they talked a lot, What if this was awkward as hell? As he entered the room the first thing he decides to call out is “Stanley Uris you have a visitor!” In a stupid automated voice that he will probably cringe about in a couple of hours time. 

There lay Stan in the hospital bed and all these feelings he felt all those years ago were now rushing to the surface, most likely embarrassment too at his dramatic entrance. Stan turned his head towards the door as he looked at Seb and studied his face.

“I’m-I’m sorry who are you?” He asked and Seb felt like a dagger was being stabbed into his heart. He nervously stepped forward to reveal himself “um...I don’t know if you remember but I saved you from the Bowers gang? We shared an ice cream in the diner? Back in Derry?” He watched as Stan quietly looked at him, god is this is ackward and heartbreaking not just because Stan is in hospital but because he doesn’t remember him, why should he? They only interacted a few times.

Stan narrowed his eyes together as he studied his face “Sebastian?” He asked and Seb’s eyes widened, he knows who he is, oh my god he knows who he is!

“Y-Yeah!”   
“Um, Hi! Do you want to sit or?”  
“Y-Yeah I’ll sit” Said Seb as he moved to the side of Stan’s bed were the chairs were set up, god why is he such an awkward mess right now?  
“How did you know I was here?” He asked next and he looked happy, considering the circumstances so it was nice to see.  
“Mike...I’ve been in Derry” Said Seb and Stan’s smile dropped.

“Y-you were in Derry? IT-“  
“-ITs dead” said Seb and Stan’s eyes widened.  
“You know?” He muttered as Seb nodded his head.  
“It’s um...it’s a long story but yeah...yeah I know” he said softly as he looked at Stan who was currently studying his face.   
“You saw it all those years ago didn’t you?” He asked as Seb nodded his head.

“Look let’s forget about the clown and all that shit! H-how are you?” Said Seb as Stan awkwardly looked around.  
“I’m okay...I guess” he watched as Stan’s eyes began to tear up a little and his lip began to tremble. Oh god, Seb is the worst person to be around when someone is sad, he just doesn’t know how to comfort people, that’s Ethan’s speciality but this is Stan and he needs to do something to make him happy.

“Hey, Hey, Hey um...it’s okay” he said as he put his hand on Stan’s shoulder as a whimper left Stan’s throat. Now that Seb can have a good look at Stan he noticed the bandages wrapped around his arms, seeing that was heartbreaking.   
“We’re all here, the others I’m sure they’ll be coming to see you and me? If you have me I’ll be there too! Like fuck, I haven’t even been home yet I drove all the way from Derry the moment Mike told me!” Exclaimed Seb as Stan sadly smiled.

“You came all this way to see me?”   
“Of course I did!” He said as a smile formed on Stan’s face, watching as he wiped his tears away.  
“Well aren’t you sweet” he said softly as Seb felt like his heart was doing flips. 

They sat for a while talking, it didn’t stop the nerves Seb was feeling the moment he heard about Stan. Now that he looks at Stan he looks exactly the same but probably taller, he couldn’t tell because he was lying down but he probably is. His face was more mature but...when he was younger he was cute but now he’s cute and hot. It made this visit more nerve wrecking if he was honest. 

He wasn’t sure how long he had been in the room until Patty entered the room with a cup of water for Stan.  
“Can I get you anything Sebastian?” She asked sweetly as Seb smiled and shook his head.  
“No but thank you, I should probably get going I haven’t even been home yet!” He exclaimed as he got of the chair.   
“Lovely meeting you Patty and nice to see you again Stan” he said as he grabbed his things.

“You’ll be back right?” Asked Stan as Seb stopped in his steps, now he was surprised. He turned back around to look at Stan   
“If-If you want me to” He stuttered as Stan smiled, relaxing into the bed.  
“Yeah I’d like that” he said softly as Seb smiled.  
“Then yeah! Yeah I’ll be back!” He said probably a little too loud as Patty looked amused.

“I’m sure you’ll let me know when you’re here right?” Smirked Stan as Seb suddenly realised the stupid thing he did when he first came into the room, goddamn it. Seb closed his eyes as he felt the embarrassment and Stan darkly chuckled, fuck! it was the hottest chuckle he ever heard. Yeah...he’s in deep.

...........

He drank when he finally came back to his apartment that night, he wanted to celebrate. He concurred his fears back in Derry and the clown is gone and now he’s got the hots for a certain Stanley Uris again. So it was a mix between ‘I’m happy I’m finally free’ and ‘I still have a crush on Stan, fuck me and change my name to Ethan Davis because I’m still pining for him!’ 

He’s not sure how many drinks he got through in his fridge but they kept coming. At one point he was dancing around singing a tune while adding that he loves Stanley Uris into his little song. Spinning and swaying around the apartment.

“Fuck! I love Stanley Uris....I LOVE STANLEY URIS!” He yelled out at one point, voice a little slurred before he heard one neighbour yelling for him to ‘shut the fuck up’ in their own words.

...........

Seb was pretty hungover the next day as he groaned and slowly walked around his apartment, as the door knocked he winced at the sound but what he wasn’t expecting to see was Ethan at his door. 

“Ethan! Hey?” He called out with confusion, still wondering why Ethan was here.  
“What? What are you doing here?”  
“What? Can’t I come and visit you?” He teased as Seb shrugged his shoulders.  
“Come on in, hope you don’t mind I’m babysitting and hungover” he explained as he stepped aside for Ethan to enter.  
“Babysitting?” Said Ethan as he raised an eyebrow at him.  
“Yeah I...I have a little brother, little fucker is fifteen and a pain in my ass” 

“If he’s a pain in the ass why do you babysit him?”  
“To make my mom happy”  
“Aw is Sebastian a mommas boy?” Teased Ethan with a smirk.  
“Okay I love my mom! So what?!” Responded Seb as he held his arms out, two glasses in his hands before turning the tap on and filling both glasses with water and making his way over, putting them down on the desk.

“So! How are things with you and Bella?” He asked as Ethan softly smiled.  
“She’s moved in with me” he responded.  
“Well aren’t you two cute” he said weakly as he still felt his hangover, fuck his head hurts.

“So what about you? I hear you visited a certain someone in the hospital” started Ethan as Seb’s eyes widened, of course Ethan remembers Seb’s little crush on Stan.

“Yeah! Yeah I’ve been visiting Stan but don’t worry, I no longer have a crush on Stanley Uris” he coughed.  
“No, you don’t have a crush on Stanley Uris!” Called out Lucas, Seb’s little bother as he entered the room causing Seb to jump a little...oh god did he?  
“Because you’re in love with him, your words not mine” he said as he leaned against the wall.

“No I’m not!” Seb Scoffed in denial.  
“You were drunk last night, dancing around and yelling about how much you love him, everyone knows dumbass!” Responded Lucas as Seb furrowed his eyebrows together.

“So lame” Whispered Lucas teasingly.  
“Well Stan has asked me to visit him again, hows that for lame?!”   
“Still lame” scoffed Lucas, shaking his head as he left to go back to the spare bedroom.  
“You’re the lame one!...you’re S-such a little shit...Fuck!” Seb embarrassingly called out as Ethan began to laugh.  
“He’s made you look like a dumbass”

Seb turned to Ethan, shock on his face at his friends response “you’re supposed to take my side!” he complained.  
“I’m only stating the truth, a fifteen year old has just made you look like a dumbass” smirked Ethan as Seb fell back into the couch he was currently sitting on. That’s when there was a knock on the door.  
“Ugh could you get that?” Groaned Seb as Ethan stood up to answer the door.

As Ethan did a man entered with a pile of magazines and letters in his hands before he slammed them on the table causing Seb to jump.  
“Oh sorry, you hungover?” Teased the man.  
“I thought you loved me Jerry” whined Seb.  
“Not when you’re yelling at 3am about how much you love Stanley”

Jerry turned to look at Ethan “this him?!” Called out Jerry, pointing at Ethan, telling off Seb like he was a naughty child.  
“Oh no! I’m Ethan, friend of Seb’s... I’m guessing you’re Jerry from next door?” Responded Ethan as Jerry narrowed his eyes and huffed as he slowly turned to look at Seb.

“Do you actually know my last name?”  
“It’s not ‘from next door’?” Muttered Seb as he raised an eyebrow. Jerry shook his head before slapping the back of his head with one of the magazines.  
“Ow!” Yelled Seb as he rubbed the back of his head causing Ethan to shake his head at the scene going on in front of him.

.........

“I can’t remember the last time I read a comic” Muttered Stan as he looked through the pages.  
“Same” Responded Seb as he sat on the chair next to him. Seb has been visiting him more often, Patty welcoming him with smiles and keeping him up to date on Stan before he goes in.

“Did Patty tell you I’m getting out tomorrow?” Said Stan causing Seb to look at him with surprise.  
“N-no, that’s great news” he responded.  
“When are you going?”  
“Some time in the morning” he explained before he was looking right into Seb’s eyes, almost like he was trying to read what was going through his head.

“I just want to say thank you for coming to visit me, I know we weren’t close as kids but it’s been nice having you here” He said before his hand held Seb’s and Seb now felt like his heart was pounding in his chest....Fuck...he doesn’t know how much he can take of this.

“I-I should probably go, I have a client to see, t-this afternoon” stuttered Seb before Stan whispered an okay. In a way Seb worried that this would be the last time he sees Stan and in a way it really hurts to think about.

As he left the room there was Patty “Hey Seb?” She started as Seb stopped in his tracks. He watched as she walked over to him, opening her mouth hesitant and closing it again as she tried to find the right words.  
“Stan likes you....like really likes you....what I’m trying to say is....I hope this is not the last time we see you” She said as she gave him a soft smile.  
“I hope so too...nice seeing you again Patty” he said as he gave a sad smile before leaving the hospital. 

.............

The day that Stan was being released from hospital Seb stayed back at his apartment with this down feeling in his gut about the fact that he will most likely not see Stan again, even if Patty has told him that Stan likes him. 

Although now that he thinks about it, Patty’s wording was strange “Stan really likes you” why would she say likes you? It’s not really something you say about a friend, almost sounds like Stan has a crush on him and Patty has gone to tell him because he’s too shy to tell him himself. Seb shook his head, he’s ridiculous for even thinking that, of course he doesn’t think of him that way, he has a wife for god sake! Who is also a lovely woman!

Lucas was back at his moms which he was glad about if he was honest because as much as he loves his little bother, the fucker would be in here teasing him about how he’s behaving like a lovesick puppy right now. 

Seb groaned as he lay on his couch, on his stomach, face pressed against the cushions, feeling sorry for himself as he stared at the wall in boredom at currently 2am. Fuck crushes! Maybe he should get drunk again, although now that he thinks about it he’d rather not face the wrath of Jerry from next door again if he were to act up.

What he wasn’t expecting the hear was a knock on his door. Seb had a confused look on his face as he looked at the time on his phone, it was definitely 2am and this was not client hours. Who would be knocking at this time? He groaned as he heard another knock on his door.

“Coming!” Called out Seb as he climbed off the couch and made his way to the door. What he wasn’t expecting to see was Stan at his door.  
“Stan?! Um hi!” He said as he nervously laughed.  
He noticed how Stan almost a little nervous as he hugged himself in the cutest black, button up coat.  
“You hungry?...there’s a diner around the corner if you wanted to come with” Asked Stan which caught Seb by surprise.

“Um yeah, sure! I’ll um...just get my coat” he said as quickly stepped back to grab his coat before locking the door behind him.

It was definitely a trip down memory lane because here Seb was, sitting in a diner and sharing an ice cream with Stan. It was bringing back memories of when they first properly spoke and Seb’s confusion about himself because the way that Stan was making him feel.

“Can’t remember the last time I’ve had ice cream” Muttered Stan with a mouthful before going to get another spoonful.  
“I think it was last week for me, my little brother basically decided to buy my silence with ice cream” Said Seb causing Stan to chuckle a little.  
“Buy your silence?”  
“Yeah he did some embarrassing shit and basically gave me ice cream in a promise I won’t tell” Explained Seb.  
“How old is he?”  
“Fifteen” Said Seb and Stan started to laugh.  
“You’re blackmailing a fifteen year old?” He laughed as Seb put his hands up in surrender.  
“Sometimes you gonna do what you gotta do to survive”   
“And you’re surviving on ice cream?”   
“Hey! You’re the one that came to my place at 2am for Ice cream!”  
“That is true” chuckled Stan and Seb couldn’t get over how cute his laugh and smile was. 

They sat there for a while until it was 4:30am before they decided to leave. Seb ended up walking Stan home like he did all those years ago back in Derry.   
“I forgot to ask! How did you know where I lived?” Asked Seb as they walked alongside each other.  
“Well you’re a PI right? I may have found your social media and got your address there” Explained Stan as Seb nodded his head.

“I actually came across one of your neighbours when trying to find your apartment, big muscular guy walking his Corgi? He seemed to know who I was” Explained Stan and Seb felt the panic and flashbacks to his drunk night.  
“Ah Jerry from next door? Whatever he told you is a lie!” Responded Seb as he tried to save himself of any embarrassment.

“Oh...so you don’t like me?” Said Stan with disappointment in his voice and Seb panicked.  
“No! NO! I like you! Like really like you!” Fuck....Stan started to smirk as he looked at Seb.

“He...he didn’t say that did he?” Stan’s smile grew wider.  
“I’m teasing with you although I’m now curious to what Jerry from next door has on you that you don’t want me to know” smirked Stan as he gently slapped Seb’s arm before they stopped outside Stan’s home.  
“So...this is my place, thank you again...for coming to visit me. It’s been nice seeing you after all these years, we didn’t really talk much as kids so it’s nice to know you thought about me” Said Stan as Seb softly smiled at him.  
“Of course I thought about you”

“I hope I’ll be seeing you again?” He asked   
“Of course” whispered Seb before he kept his eyes on Stan. He didn’t really know what was going through his head or even if he was thinking clearly but the next thing he knows, he’s leaning forward and softly pressing a kiss to Stan’s cheek. He kept his lips on his cheek for a moment and he could feel Stan’s cheek heat up under his touch before he pulled away.

“Goodnight Seb” he said with a soft smile and his cheeks now looking a little flustered.  
“Goodnight Stan” he whispered back before he watched Stan walk over to his door, unlocking it before entering. He looked back at Seb again, softly smiling before the door closed.

Something tells him that he will be seeing Stan a lot more.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, it would honestly mean a lot if you could leave a comment letting me know what you think so far! I have honestly spent so much time and effort on this and the characters in this story so it would mean a lot if you could leave a comment.


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